Inno, a great descriptive tale with some nice wording
the sound & the feels, action & reaction, the internal workings..
the good & the bad, the heat & the cold its all quite extravagant
your stint in the poetry league brought its share of advantages
also its window pane...not pains, regardless I liked the usage.
you dont focus on wild multis & let your simplicity remain obtrusive.
aside from a few errors you craft a delectable tale when you show
hopefully you will stay in the league until the end....ya know?
Winery, this was an interesting twist on the topic.
I read it a few times to understand the vibe you flaunted.
the idea of death as a cab driver is brought together nicely
but the idea of a Frenchmen & the use of *mate* is unlikely
the throw up your arm sequence seemed club songesque.
also the idea of ET & mars could be interpreted in the wrong sense.
aside from that I feel your approach was cool & quite original
if you focused more you would be a dangerous individual...
v/this is a toughie due to both writers using differing styles
I like the way Inno took the descriptive approach an extra mile.
while Adonis took a more original approach while delving deep
Adonis could have cut the ET portion & acted more selfishly...
less is more when it comes to the type of approach that you took
its interesting watching two poetic minds bringing the topical a new look.
I think Im going to have to give this one to Adonis though..
this could go either way because both did work with their topic yo....
but I have Adonis taking this one, nice work young thugs
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