MMLp - flow was real sick, the second stanza had sick imagery, but the first, i was really confused aside from a few lines. I think you could've cut this down by 12 lines or so. the ending was pretty funny. you know it had a personality, i didn't really connect to the story emotionally though. the imagery was fresh but i didn't care about the character once i realized she was a chicken.
pent - woah this was fresh. the message was very clear and each line constructed a new idea or developed an existing one in a different way, although the ending was so obvious it was unneccessary. i guess this is a credit to your clarity in this verse but i think you couldve went without it. the flow was the best this round. do you ever get rusty?
v/ pent - connected to it more and the mechanics were fresh. the pieces progression was top notch too
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Originally Posted by asylum
? subtly? what the fuck is a subtly? i dont know what that is. can someone help me out?
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