Razah- aspiring master counseling the beginner?? This was very well written from a technical pov. I liked the Rhymes and transitions a lot. This is no amateur work, though it is not perfect. I read this a few times throughout the week and never really got around to voting on it, but every read made the verse a little better to me. Good job bro.
Nyc- dope drop. I'm a fan of narratives and even more a fan of seemless rhyming in narratives. My problem is some of the awkward lines in here:
When a cultural abomination occured - dissing the elderly...
so Oshin disabled its maker. etc
This was a cool Kung fu classic style story, but the ending feels incomplete and it doesn't come off as final as what I would have expected from this topic. But maybe this was intentional. Good job either way :)
I enjoyed Razah's for the technical rhyming and concise crafting and I liked NYC's story, even though the story didn't quite end right for me. MVGT RAZAH for what I believe was the overall slightly better verse with less flaws. Thanks for showing guys.
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Ahem.
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