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Old 05-07-2015, 06:52 AM   #8
Split Eight
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- Haiku Writers Challenge

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How can we avoid the lies? Most lessons question all
breaking down necessity when it’s really obsessions’ call
you had a vision but was it what taught you to see?

I thought this was dope. The middle line was a little shaky for me because the act of 'breaking down necessity' doesn't hold much meaning in and of itself, and the clarifying detail 'when it's really obsessions call' doesn't give that phrase any more meaning or weight. It seams like a throwaway line.
But the two lines it was sandwiched between both spoke volumes.


tuning out bad vibes doesn’t speak volumes of me
being wrong comes with a fee, the price of intellect
most answers come from experience despite the internet

Interesting, like this. Can't quite figure out the first line, I get the wordplay but I'm not understanding it's meaning.


Cool tho. Write more
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PancakeBrah View Post
I'm going to start off on a tangent.

when I write, lately, I feel as if I begin by stringing together ambient ideas and concepts, then i realize I'm just typing the words coffee, tawdry, and autumn over and over and over, again, then I pass out dru-
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