I've got to say that this is impressive.
Structurally I admire the way you choose to break up your lines, helping the flow. Something I'm currently working
on.
This part entertained me the most and was dope:
they say environment picks up for where genetics are careless
meaning "you" are just a mixture of your friends and your parents
any sense of awareness boasted is illogical strides
life's a stage of nurtured monologues and genomic asides
^The ending metaphor ties together the first couplet succinctly and cleverly. Plus the rhymes are very good.
|