Fenix; Endless onslaught. A forward march of malay. Very unrelenting piece. Every stanza was a demonstrative display of will power. With so many continuous themes in one piece; it becomes very difficult to bring any seriousness to it. You did somehow.
Just Write; ''Endless vision goggles that glisten; red dots in iraq' Dope line. Good aggressive flow for such a sad piece. If there was a 12 line limit - you'd win. I look forward to reading the rest of this piece in the open mic forum.
V/ Osiris
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