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Old 07-23-2014, 12:04 PM   #6
Amen
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@ribbit - please work on your structure as well as end rhymes, bro. I mean, you hardly rhymed anything. Not sure what type of accent you have, but...

Pop shit/Coffin - Do not rhyme
Locksmith/Dog shit - The smith/shit's a near rhyme but comes off awkward

Quote:
tough love k but why thug when u get no love..plus
u cant c rib through his smoke bombs
and guess wat? noone wants u to get there vote
like blacks who are running for office
Not sure what ^ is, tbh. Is it 2 bars/4lines or 1 bar/2lines in a weird stretched format?

And your closer really didn't make much sense to me, tbr. With that being said, I'm not trying to come off as a dick but this verses was pretty terrible, IMO. Work on structuring your bars/lines in a better format because it caused issues while reading, from a readers perspective. I had a hard time trying to follow a flow not to mention, your end rhymes were off as well so I couldn't find any type of flow. Concepts were weak/not effective, just an overall pretty bad verse.

vs

Hunts had an OK'ish verse. Nothing really WOW'd me but you had a few attempts. I liked the concepts on your name flip attempts but feel the executions could have been worded in more of a harsher manner.

Quote:
You ain't deadly with shit...homie go rethink ya thesis
I could revolutionize butchery the way I chop bits to pieces
Thinkin about gettin a hot start on the board ?..nah kid
I'm like a vegan the way we'll never get a chance to see a prime rib
IMO, were your best bars/PUNS. The rest was blahhh'ish to me. I see you have the basics down just work on structuring your punches with fresher and more effective concepts with harsh executions and you'll be straight, bro...

Overall: IMO, this battle was pretty one sided as ribbit had nothing vs the 2 quotes I got from HUNTS which were his best bars out of the entire verse. So with that being said...

v/K Huntsman