Flo -- lmfao@the end....that shit made me crack a smile. I was struggling to read some of this because of grammar, spelling and wording. Also some of your end rhymes were a little off putting. I liked the idea of a weird "land" or "area" like this - shit like this is cool and gives the writer a lot of creative room to breathe - but I dont feel like you really painted the landscape. I feel like you just put a bunch of animals on a blank canvass and it felt boring.
Topical -- for such a short verse it was had a lot of impact. Very simple idea attacked very specifically. I appreciated how you approached the topic. The writers voice felt very mature - observing and describing this woman's trek through singledom. I really dont have much to say...possibly the best verse of this week.
vote - topical
Last edited by Pent uP; 07-27-2013 at 07:11 PM.
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