MOTERHFUCKING WISE WAYS ROAST THREAD
 

http://i.imgur.com/Ahw7r6v.jpg

LOL @ this dude.

"mom can you take a picture of me?"

-- " no honey I'm busy fucking the landlord."

"mooooooooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!!"

lol dude took a picture of himself. Look like dull boy circa 2004. (jokes funnier if youve seen dull boy circa 2004)

lol leaned back to take a picture of himself. Take ninety three. Sweating. Doing a little kissy pose. "I hope this doesnt accentuate my muffin top" "I guess I can crop it out" "Wait FUCK MY hoodies closed" he says. Unzips his hoody a bit. "Gotta have them see the logo" he says. "Cool shirt I picked up from Old Navy"

lol @ your haircut. Goes to the salon his mom works at. "I want Jess to cut it. She does it the way I like it mom" Asks for square sideburns. Thinks its cool. Think it's opposite to the pointy sideburns. "Makes me look wise......wise ways...yeah that's what I'll call myself" Nerd. Crunches his forehead so it seems smaller to cover up the atrocity a haircut. Look like you eat toothpaste. Lol @ your throat/chin. Look like a mature rooster. Cockledoodledoo motherfucker. Wanna rhyme roast you, almost. Look like Joaquin Phoenix that eats Kleenex. Look like an extra in a movie where the extra has to invoke a white urban youth aura. Wearing blush. Blush on your eyebrows. Look like you're flirting with me through the camera. Picture for an online dating site. Taking a selfie.

"Look at my shirt, I'm so fucking wicked I smoke weed bro" lol. Pulled his baggy shirt up to cover his throat. Lowered the camera angle. Been on the news before for murdering kittens. Kitten murderer. Write wise in kitten blood.

Wise ways. Wise weighs 249 pounds. lol @ your jewish nose. Look like the cashier at gamestop. Posts this on his facebook. Captions the picture "umad bro?" next picture on his feed is a excerpt from the new Battlefield 4 game. "totes going hard in b4 dudez" picture of him blowing up a tank. No likes. His grandmother likes his fat smurf hoody picture. Currently in awe at the size of your sideburns. "use the brush to wipe the hair inbetween my chins, Jess" Mother rolls her eyes.

lol

this nigga looks like dolph lundgren went on a strict diet of milkshakes and brown hair dye

this nigga got his momma's eyelashes talkin' like "respect me as a man"

The insides of his eyelids glow in the dark.

Looks like the fat kid from Matilda that eats the cake, but a grown up version. http://24.media.tumblr.com/wj9Eqnxmg...EgXco1_500.png

Thinks his shirt will get him laid.

He weighs as much as his three best friends combined, which is not to call him fat, really.

Usually if you take an outline of someones head you can tell it's a human. If you take a silhouette outline from Wise's head you can't differentiate between a pictogram of Jupiter or a tonka truck. Big ass head. Don't even know where it starts/ends. I'm thinking under his shirt somewhere.

this nigga bought a hoody while looking for fat shoe laces.



this nigga bought a "flirty girl fitness" dvd to achieve a stronger kiss.



this nigga bought his shirt using his mom's lan line telephone when the nick at nite channel had an auction at 4 am.

Has tried committing suicide with his hoody shoe laces. Chews on them to savor the chicken he had before to keep him riding until his next meal. Collects his neck sweat in plastic bags.

lol @ when he tried to commit suicide his hoody laces slipped from the grease on his neck. "Wise ways get yourself together" he murmurs as he realizes his failed suicide attempt.

this nigga got a square head but a round-about way of thinking

this nigga fell dick first into everything homosexual

this nigga kissed his dad on the lips after finding out he was the only boy his parents ever had

Bats his eyebrows to work out. Practices kissing in the mirror. Takes pictures of himself kissing to achieve perfect kissing gesticulation. Memorized the words to Cry Me a River. Looks like Joba Chamberlain from the Yankees. http://image.cdnllnwnl.xosnetwork.co...0127201948.jpg

has a jersey with the initials W.W on it. Thinks he's walter white. Quotes one of his raps. Reenacts the scene with Hank. He's hank though cause he's fat.

this nigga bleeds other people's dicks

this nigga goes to dance recitals....


....to learn

this nigga only got two hands...that's 10 whole friends he can count on

This is the face he gives his mother when he wants bananas diced into his cheerios and she says 'you've had enough bananas ji-" he interrupts her to say "CALL ME WISE!!!!!!!!!"

You can't give puppy dog faces if you look like you eat puppy dogs. Has a journal. Doubts himself.

Likes scary movies.

http://i.imgur.com/8RwameR.jpg

favourite hip hop CD is by CunninLynguists:

Will Rap For Food.