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Old 10-07-2015, 03:59 AM   #1
Dearg
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Default Dullahan (CLOSED. DON'T POST HERE FAGGOT)

Quote:
Dullahan, a name that can be translated to “dark man.”

Often portrayed in contemporary fantasy fiction and video games, this foreteller of death is the Irish version of the headless horseman.

The Dullahan rides a headless black horse with flaming eyes, carrying his head under one arm. When he stops riding, a human dies.

Some versions of this legend say that the Dullahan throws buckets of blood at people he passes, while other say he simply calls out the name of the mortal that will soon die.

As with most evil forces, the Dullahan has a weakness – gold.

The creature is scared of the substance, so any lonely travelers this Halloween night would be wise to have some on him in case they have a run-in with this headless horror!
Riding into the night, spending an eternity reminded of life,
a horse black as the plague, eyes burning, a violent sublime.
His head under one arm, but the horseman swings a bucket,
painting everyone in blood, remorseless, he reaps injustice.
For days and nights, trotting from city to city, idol dedication,
when he halts, somebody will quit breathing, final destination.
The children of Ireland fear the sound of hooves on the gravel,
praying for the silence, their bound by books of his travels.
If he comes around, hope he never mentions your name,
otherwise look out... somebody's already digging your grave.
He's immortal, but if you've got gold make sure to wear it,
because nothing touches the soul like the worth they cherished.
Maybe he used to be a king, or maybe a poor rover,
or maybe wedding rings remind him of a warm shoulder.
Reminds him of life and how it was before the possession,
before the ride became his source of aggression.
He's not a figment of Halloween, he's a limitless demon,
collecting hollow screams from spiritless regions.
Searching the land for something beautiful,
but if you see him, plan a touching funeral.
He's a rider of the storm, the devil's favorite pet,
everyone is warned by being painted red.
If you see him, make sure to show him vast riches,
or else the demon will become your last witness
.
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Old 10-07-2015, 05:45 AM   #2
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I will get to this in the am bruh
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Old 10-07-2015, 04:40 PM   #3
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Old 10-08-2015, 03:17 AM   #4
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dope.. very nice syllabic structure/flow/&rhymes

personally i disliked the violent sublime phrase... seemed like a force for a rhyme, unless i'm missing some meaning of that phrase. Even if it means what i think it means-- don't like it there... everything else I'm a big fan of.. especially liked how you speculated on what he used to be / why gold is his achilles heal..

Maybe he used to be a king, or maybe a poor rover,
or maybe wedding rings remind him of a warm shoulder.
Reminds him of life and how it was before the possession,
before the ride became his source of aggression.

nice. first two lines here "speculation", 2nd two lines a "rhythmic summary", so to speak.

He's not a figment of Halloween, he's a limitless demon,
collecting hollow screams from spiritless regions.

dope couplet

Searching the land for something beautiful,
but if you see him, plan a touching funeral.

straightforward and (to me) funny. i like that rhyme a lot lmao kind of an example where a simple adjective works well...

if "not liking" violent sublime but "liking" touching funeral makes it seem like i'm sending mixed messages, sorry, it's just the way i see it. Guess I would say(in my view),in one instance it didn't work, but in another it worked well.
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Old 10-08-2015, 04:17 AM   #5
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Glad you liked it man. Releasing a series of these. One will be with Witty, another will be with Godcomplex. Who knows about the rest. Hit me up if you're interested.
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