Elite 8 Magazine

[Paradigm]

The Summer Classic

Welcome to round 3! The Elite 8 Magazine. Last round we had a few #1 seeds exit the tourney. I told everyone this is the tournament where people elevate into the spotlight and make a name for themselves. This round has shaped up to be entertaining with some old beefs and lols matchups. I would like to particularly spotlight the matchup between Destroyer and Bags. Can the student become the master? Can ill nik-A move into the final four and set himself up for that tourney win to get into the Hall of Fame? Will BROKE LESNAR have an opponent to battle this whole tournament? Can Aero prove his self proclaimed status? Can Tic Tac save Rap Battles? All valid questions. I'll let all of you Sea Critics out there decide.

[Paradigm]

Reviews

Alvin Karpis [VS] murda sho [murda sho wins 7-3]
Alvin had to be the favorite to win this years classic after winning the NBL. I felt like this should've been closer than it was and people sort of hated on Alvin's verse, to be honest. I thought he was more consistent here but the voters have spoken and didn't like the clever bars this round. Murda sho came with two dope bars and was enough to defeat this years favorite. Good battle.

Aero the Apex [VS] Tettris [Aero the Apex wins by No Show]
Tettris no showed here. Aero psyched him out. Mind control. Sun Tzu like.

BROKE LESNAR [VS] Defiant [BROKE LESNAR wins by No Show]
Broke Lesnar brought them BARS. Defiant lives on desert aboriginie time or was too busy digging a tunnel out of Gaza to show. Who knows. Irony that Broke had that no show personal.

Tic Tac [VS] Lyfza Gamble [Tic Tac wins 5-0]
Last round I gave Gamble props for being creative but lacking the execution. I wasn't lying, however this round? LOL C'mon mannnnn.

Originally Posted by Lyfza Gamble

This guy is just a mess. You need fixing with your dream visions
U wanna hear a Secret Tic? You're life expectancy in the oceans compared to a fish. I heard this from a Sea Critic.
This fucking dweebs done. still wanting a bunch of stuff he doesn't need done
But fuck it, he's trash... So watch me hand him ass... U could call it a liposuction refund.

Sea critic? What did this sea critic tell you. I'm pretty sure he would've told you to delete this bar, IMMEDIATELY.
You are going to hand him ass? Pause. I don't know what to say Lyfza Gamble. It seems like you rushed your verse and just said fuck it maybe no one will notice. No hate. Just saying. Tic Tac came with generic RB style and did just enough to win here. He will need to bring his best, and from what i've read on RB he has the ability to, to beat Broke Lesnar next round who has been beasting the no show circuit.

LOTB:
Ya girl loves my Sex game, she sings when I’m fillin her mate
She says Lyfe’s too Short. & getting in bed w/ you is a Gamble she’s not willing to take

Allen Knight [VS] Destroyer [Destroyer wins by No Show]
The build up to this match was huge. The hype was real. Allen Knight decided not to show.

Swerve [VS] Bags [Bags wins 8-3]
Swerve had to leave for real life responsibility's and it showed in his verse. His bars were stretched and lacked execution. Bags came with a way better verse than last round, this time around he had a personal touch and brought the humor he's known for.

LOTB:
Para got me facin a baboon. Im the favorite u wack fool
& u aint gon change the tide....even if ur back IS shaped like a half moon

ill nik-A [VS] Sharp Nine [ill nik-A wins 5-0]
This was a pretty even match. ill nik-A does what he does best and came with consistency. Sharp had 1-2 dope concepts that barely missed. ill nik-A also had the lotb that edged out sharps best. Good battle.

LOTB:
hiding ur passion is wrong, find my car in the garage when smashin ur mom…
I wont panic nor run, besides, u crash on the same couch I’ve had many pull-out accidents on

Orc [VS] Greed [Orc wins 5-0]
Greed didn't execute concepts very well here. The emoG line was kinda clever and funny though. Orc didn't come with anything really good or amazing here but every at the same time he didn't have any real complete misses here unlike Greed.

LOTB:
I'm who u try to be don't deny it Greed it's there for the eye to see
It's ironic saying you not a big O fan when ur necks a fucking shrine to me

Top Punches

murda sho:
Heard u & ur redskin broke up cause she's a whore & likes to screw
She said u were the worst date for an Indian since 1492

murda sho:
At bars chicks call u "fuckin clown", he gets denied by the bunches
He couldn't get chicks to write numbers down with Defiant's top punches

Alvin Karpis:
I pull dimes w/ ease, they always fall in love son
I’m intelligent & never had a dumb THOT, and well you can’t even fuck one

Tic Tac:
Ya girl loves my Sex game, she sings when I’m fillin her mate
She says Lyfe’s too Short. & getting in bed w/ you is a Gamble she’s not willing to take

Bags:
I send haymakers. Ur old ass flips r dead weight player...
Cuz all ur complex structures come w/ section 8 & lead paint waivers

Bags (EVEN THOUGH FOOL/MOON DON'T RHYME)
Para got me facin a baboon. Im the favorite u wack fool
& u aint gon change the tide....even if ur back IS shaped like a half moon

Sharp Nine:
The bitch forgot how to fuck. said you never pound it, mac
We had to start from scratch... n ended with claw marks down my back

ill nik-A:
hiding ur passion is wrong, find my car in the garage when smashin ur mom…
I wont panic nor run, besides, u crash on the same couch I’ve had many pull-out accidents on

Destroyer:
des will leave u stranded in locks, after i slam u with shots
until Al is in chains screaming 'I'm the man in the box'

Broke Lesnar:
u got that eligible bachelor swag but it's certainly fake
cuz any hag u dip ur wiccan would beg to be tied down...to a post and burned at the stake

[Paradigm]

NO SHOW SHINE

Aero the Apex:

2009 Username swept you, that's the last time you had relevance
For perspective
It's also the year MJ died and Barack became the first black president
This is a no show verse, it's sad you heartless
On the plus side I'll have dope lines for Murda Sho or Alvin Karpis
My plan worked, hype the battle & make you so afraid you couldn't cope
Then I'd drop a late night key style knowing you wouldn't show
You're a fag, I'll have beams pointed at this red head for the torture
So many red dots on your face that have nothing to do with your genetic disorder
Voters don't get that? All red heads freckles, you're a gay writer
Tet's such a panzee Mike Wrecka wants to put him in the ring with an MMA fighter
I get pussy, I could get 50 girls to score with
Last time I could name even 6 to sextet was a musical performance

Destroyer:

how the fuck u even get let back into the summer classic scene tho?
when u shit all over the first take like u were making 'suck my cockuccino'
listen chico, I'm old and losing hair, but it's u who needs to quit
so please forgive my New York lisp when I say that alopecia shit
i fire off space jam weapons to defeat a challenge
so u can call me Marvin the Martian when I bring the Heat Ray Allen
des will leave u stranded in locks, after i slam u with shots
until Al is in chains screaming 'I'm the man in the box'
I'm gonna find u, & run u over in a truck or range rover
scrape u off the street & make Allen stew, like it's the fucking Hangover
u ain't clever bitch & this is as far as u will ever get
anyone saying Allen & 'round three' is talking bout how many organs I left u with

BROKE LESNAR:

ur a pathetic loser and never been called a boyfriend
cuz whenever u vent ur sob stories, ur dates would rather crawl through one to avoid them
n' if u DO have a girl, bruh? I'm fucking with the mood
have ur bitch Naked and Afraid......u'll come home while I'm in the bush rummaging for food
u got that eligible bachelor swag but it's certainly fake
cuz any hag u dip ur wiccan would beg to be tied down...to a post and burned at the stake
pretty ur broad up b4 I get caught in some penal thing
ur bitch too cheap to get me off, but I'm still going to slammer....Rawn MacDon's legal team
ur most creative "BROKE" lines too obvious n' way soft
while those np's Defuse bomb,I hope u fail at that too n' blow ur disgusting fucking face off
back when I left NC u were BARELY considered mid-tier
3 yrs later n' u've still yet to Evolve, ironic isn't it? since it took him NS'ing for u to get here
15 total wins: 11 of those were NS's and only 4 legit, this some important shit..

Originally Posted by important shit

Defiant [VS] Evolve [Defiant wins by NS]
Defiant (2-3) vs texcellence (2-1)-Def wins via NS
Cymbicort (1-2) vs Defiant (1-3) - DEFIANT WINS BY NS
Defiant vs. Blanco Bishop - DEFIANT WINS BY NS
RD1: God of War vs. Defiant. - {Defiant. wins by NS}
John Hensley vs. Defiant {Defiant wins by NS}
Defiant vs. Ctrl Alt Elite {Defiant wins by NS}
non azn Bob vs Defiant {Defiant wins by NS}
Hollywood vs. Defiant {Defiant wins by NS}
Defiant vs. Arch. {Defiant wins by NS}
Defiant vs. NaymikZ. {Defiant wins by NS}

..cuz if ur 4-15 since NC force-closed, close the thread..this faggot should be forced to quit
ur concepts BEEN stale n'them garbage flips are a waste
trust me Defile fucking murder u......then do that and draw little sharpie dicks all over ur face

Predictions

murda sho [VS] Aero the Apex
murda sho is coming off a victory vs the NBL Champion so he has to be the favorite to win here. Aero already used his scare tactic once this tournament. He's fooling no one here this round. If both show this should be a good battle.

Winner: murda sho 60/40

BROKE LESNAR [VS] Tic Tac
BROKE LESNAR has been beasting his opponents into submission. So much so they refuse to show. Tic Tac has the ability to come pretty nice but hasn't really shown it this tournament. Hopefully both put up there best and make this interesting.

Winner: BROKE LESNAR 75/25

Destroyer [VS] Bags
LOOOOOOOOOOL. It's sort of hilarious how this ended up happening. Bags coming out of his hiatus to be a reserve and being placed into the same bracket as Allen Knight and Destroyer. Either way that battle ended this round would've been interesting. I expect a plethora of personals and funny lines. Do not disappoint Netcees. @BROKE LESNAR must vote on this battle.

Winner: Bags 100/0

ill nik-A [VS] Orc
ill nik-A aka Mr. Consistency versus an Orc most people have kind of disappointed with looking at the votes. Orc hasn't really been tested yet this tournament and has written down to his competition. I think ill nik-A is going to drop more than a few hay makers here so hopefully Orc matches ill nik-A here and makes this battle a dope one.

Winner: ill nik-A 60/40

[Paradigm]

SHEEP

What is a sheep? Someone who follows the crowd and can't make his own decisions. Someone who can't vote based on their own opinion. Someone who reads everyone's votes before formulating their own conclusion. Someone who can't vote on a battle because they are scared of what people might think. If you reference another vote from someone else or others in your vote you're a sheep. Formulate your own opinions. Your dick riding faggotry will be exposed. All lame ass members boarding will be exposed.
No show verses. Do not post a "No Show Verse". This is not acceptable. If you post a "No Show" verse and Your opponent shows up I will open votes right there. Numbers and Random words joined together is also not acceptable. That just shows me you did not take the 3-4days you had to write and disrespected everyone else who signed up for the tourney. Type your goddamn verses and send them to me if you don't want to post early or "waste" bars. - The Shepherd

2009 Username swept you, that's the last time you had relevance
For perspective
It's also the year MJ died and Barack became the first black president
This is a no show verse, it's sad you heartless
On the plus side I'll have dope lines for Murda Sho or Alvin Karpis
My plan worked, hype the battle & make you so afraid you couldn't cope
Then I'd drop a late night key style knowing you wouldn't show
You're a fag, I'll have beams pointed at this red head for the torture
So many red dots on your face that have nothing to do with your genetic disorder
Voters don't get that? All red heads freckles, you're a gay writer
Tet's such a panzee Mike Wrecka wants to put him in the ring with an MMA fighter
I get pussy, I could get 50 girls to score with
Last time I could name even 6 to sextet was a musical performance

Originally Posted by BROKE LESNAR

I'm not allowed to vote for Bags so I figured I would write up a draw vote and just vote for him next round. Consider this more of a feed than a judgment. Bags had the lotb with the half-moon line. It had the impact MS' 1492 line had. His top turnbuckle line was great, too. Along with the rest of his verse ( I had to omit portions so as to not look biased, which I'm obviously not). Swerves personals involving me and Des were funny. I liked them alot. The Try-Force line was my favorite from Swerve with an honorable mention for the Tag Team battle line.

Originally Posted by Destroyer

opener and defiant line
vs
thot and almost the closer

pretty much have to echo the mutual feelings here
seems like karp slacked and murda brought that fire

v/sho

Outro

The tournament so far has been been a success. Dope bars. Votes coming in a timely fashion. Limited no shows. Limited sheepness. Keep it up everyone. Don't be a sheep and keep the activity up. Battles this round look to keep the name true. Summer Classic.

[Orc]

Good read. First time I've been underdog in a text battle for at least 2 years.

[BROKE LESNAR]

lmao great mag

[Destroyer]

everybody reads votes you weirdo
sometimes, votes explain lines that may have gone over someone's head
why is that a bad thing to you? It's literally being more informed before casting a vote. Reading votes doesn't make people sheep, bro. Sheep would be reading the votes to make sure that you don't vote for someone that nobody else is voting for. Certainly people do that, but to simply point at everyone who reads votes, and calling them sheep is insulting and quite invalid.

[Destroyer]

also, 100/0? really?
suck a dick
dude calls out "dick riding faggotry" specifically and then puts up 100/0 odds?

Good mag, Para. Props, dude.

[Ghost1]

LOL@100-0

Id be lying if i said the para des beef hasnt started to amuse me haha

[Ghost1]

Also damn @ how fast u put this mag up lmao. Props.

[Allen Knight]

Originally Posted by Destroyer

also, 100/0? really?
suck a dick
dude calls out "dick riding faggotry" specifically and then puts up 100/0 odds?

HHahHHHHhHjA

[Hush]

Would 95%-5%
Really have made u feel better?

[murda sho]

@Orc... USGang... Nuff said.

[Destroyer]

Originally Posted by Hush

Would 95%-5%
Really have made u feel better?

LMAO

and fuck you

[Orc]

Originally Posted by murda sho

@Orc... USGang... Nuff said.

GANG!

[Paradigm]

Originally Posted by Destroyer

everybody reads votes you weirdo
sometimes, votes explain lines that may have gone over someone's head
why is that a bad thing to you? It's literally being more informed before casting a vote. Reading votes doesn't make people sheep, bro. Sheep would be reading the votes to make sure that you don't vote for someone that nobody else is voting for. Certainly people do that, but to simply point at everyone who reads votes, and calling them sheep is insulting and quite invalid.

the sheep mentality.

[Sho Money EMG]

Hand him his ass* lmao. Wow I fucked up

[Destroyer]

Originally Posted by Paradigm

the sheep mentality.

so let me get this straight
anyone who doesn't blindly agree with what you say has the sheep mentality?

[Paradigm]

In this case, yes. If you can't form your own opinion to vote and just echo the ones of others you are incredibly lame. Nuff said.

btw that 100/0 was in jest but roflz at you getting bent out of shape. Classic Des response. My work here is done.