Untitled

[JustRap]

I'm stirring up sweat, no assurance of mirrored respect
The appearance is kept, the severeness of my past
Is of no clearance to death, my father's broken in two
Watching me fail in everything that I've chosen to do
Hoping success comes soon, that it was frozen in youth
But I can't get passed the presence of stress, thrashed
And tested by massive ingestion of poison infused
With puffin clouds in my room trying to defuse feelings
Of doom, meanwhile mothers asking questions a lot
I dodge and evade em cause it's a no love equation
With her I've grown up abrasive, alone, with no patience
It's the genome invasion, the curse of generations
So I get high to hide my limitations under a blanket
There is no mitigation or a action to strengthen me
My pain is a constant sensation, but I've got drugs
Thankfully, the concept of family is so estranged to me
One day I'll cock back and end my misery DRUNK
WHILE I stare into the eyes of my dysfunction angrily

[Alice]

Originally Posted by JustRap

Is of no clearance to death, my father's broken in two
Watching me fail in everything that I've chosen to do
Hoping success comes soon, that it was frozen in youth

Loved these the most. Simple, reflective and so on point - perfect second line. Also appreciate the tone and consistency throughout. I wasn’t too fond of the last line, rhythmically at least. But it conveyed the finality if it all very well, and often that might be better than a focus on rhythm/multi laden approach alone. Hope to read more, a longer piece would be interesting.