SHORT-VERSE QUARTERFINALS MAGAZINE

[Certain]

Eight Is Enough
INTRODUCTION by Certain





Welcome back. All we have left is one of the best quarterfinal rounds I've ever seen, then two more great ones. The line limit is up to 12 now, and we've got a hell of a set of matchups. Let's have everyone show. Hopefully this magazine, with an interview with trap and verse of the round picks from Split and oats as well as my usual stuff, will inspire.

Before we begin, I do one to address very quickly a point made by kannon in one of his votes. He said that having set topics was futile when everyone approached them so differently. I think the opposite is true: The topics are like land plots, and each of competitor is expected to use that land as productively as he can. One might plant apple trees and produce a nice harvest after a long wait. Another might start up several small business and create a flourishing economy with great speed but damage the land in the process. The voter, then, determines who used that equal ground best. That's what we're doing here. That's what makes this so fun and competitive. And with that said, let's get on with the show.



THE INTERVIEW trap, with Certain
One of the true veterans of text rap is also a member of our final eight here, and he shares some thoughts.





Hey, trap. What's happening with you these days?

Doing my Military thing. About to get out next year and join the civilian world / government section. Currently typing this at 6am on my cell phone in bed in between a boxer mix and a pitbull mix. Still loving Chipotle.


Now some of our topical community here might not be too familiar with you. As I understand it, you started text rap back in 1996 or 1997 on a bunch of defunct sites before landing at Urban Prowlers in, what, 2001? From there, you started joining up at other forums, never the most active guy but always a steady presence for a solid 17 or 18 years now. If any of that's untrue, please correct me. But if I'm right, I'm interested in getting to know your roots in actual topical battling. I remember you joining the RSTL in 2004, but was that your first exposure? When did you start to see the ideal of topical battling, as opposed to open mic writing, becoming popular?

Yep, I started in 96 on a site called Sethros. I made that my home site until it went under in 99-00. UPN actually started in 2000, under a different name, then went through a server / site change...some nerdy technical jargon and became prowlers. I thought I joined the RSTL a bit earlier, but who knows. Back in the beginning of "textceeing", we had no real Discussion Board. All you had was the Open Mic forum. You wrote rhymes, created collabs, battled, gave critics, and sometimes had mini tournaments...all in one forum. It was the wild west. I liked writing stories, and there was no other outlet until I saw the RSTL and the amount of talent there. Plus, it helped that I was jobless during my stint there. All I did was eat and write rhymes.

Topical battling definitely was large from 02 - 05, in my eyes. There were so many good writers, and from what I saw later on, biters, that those formative years were already such a high point.


That last question was way too long. What'd you have for lunch?

Since it's morning now, I'll go with yesterday's lunch...which was a bag of popcorn and a large chocolate chip cookie. Work was a bitch, no time for a good lunch.


I had Panda Express because they have introduced orange chicken with bacon. I had to try it, but it wasn't that great. We probably should talk about this tournament. Who among the eight remaining do you see as the favorite?

I'm not sure if there is a clean cut favorite, but just based on last round I really enjoyed Soulstice's verse. If he wrote like that for the rest of the tournament, he would win. I don't see that happening though. People always tend to stray from what they are good at in their writing abilities in these later rounds and it fucks them over. Eng is up there too. Oats is very consistent and I don't see him waivering. Everyone has done well.


The eight remaining competitors are some of the cleanest, most refined writers on this site, people with very much their own defined styles. Whose style do you like the most, personally?

Kannons, because he writes like I do now. I did the Split / Pancake style for years in the RSTL. So did you really, and Lars. That can only get you so far. I went back to the basics after that and refined my style so that every verse I write you could envision it as an album track and / or something your favorite artist might spit.


Who would be the G.O.A.T. at short-verse topical battling? Don't say Cimmerian because everyone would say Cimmerian.

I think E2 could've managed the short verse technique down pretty well. If noone knows of him, check the UPN archives. He might even be on here. Sime and prieSt would be good fits as well.

And Cimmerian.


We've been around the block. What's your goal with this hobby at this point? To a degree, I'm looking to just keep this going because I enjoyed it so much when I was younger. But I also still like it, like doing it, like seeing it done well.

I have no goals. Right now I'm doing this because it's only 10 lines and I hate writing long verses anymore. I think I was on the top 10 list at RM and still might be for most active writers or weeks in a row in the RSTL with close to 80 weeks or so. I burned myself out. Real life happened. I just got over it. This has been really enjoyable and I won't write again unless it's in this format. I don't know how you keep going.


Like kannon, you still listen to a lot of rap in 2014. So what's your pick for album or mixtape of the year thus far?

CES Cru - Codename: Ego Stripper. Glad to see my KCMO homies doing it big. (Editor's note: The music video embedded above this interview is them.)


When was the last time you flossed?

I floss everyday or every other day. You should do that. I only brush once a day. That's all you need man.


I never floss, but I brush three to four times a day. Do you have any closing thoughts?

Good luck to Kannon. I already have my idea for my verse and I'm super psyched about it. Splits predictions on it will be wrong.



Round 2 Rewind
BATTLE REVIEWS by Certain
Stephen King novels turned out to be great inspirations, as Round 2 was even better than Round 1. Though there was a clear-cut battle of the round, all five were great, as were the no-show verses.





1. Soulstice beats Pent uP 5-3. | Different Seasons
Well, we have a clear-cut frontrunner for battle of the tournament. This one, in my eyes, produced the two best verses of the round and also the best 10-line topical battle on this site, edging even my own hubris about my Battle Arena loss to dead man. Soulstice came out on top because he simply wrote his fucking ass off. The rhyme schemes and word choices were on point throughout the entire verse, with no slip-ups or complaints to be seen. His characterization of drug addiction as a mistress was a little cliché, but he made up for it with his impeccable imagery and allusion. Pent uP countered with one of the most startlingly candid verses about this whole Internet writing experience that I've read. (Yes, I've read plenty.) The way he weaved the seasons in along with his normal barrage of multiple-syllable rhyming was impressive, but what got me was how connected I became to this verse and how real it felt. This was the kind of classic battle that every tournament aspires to have.

Originally Posted by Soulstice

In The Hague - resplendent and beckoning back to her treacherous medicine
He would fade - back to dozens of glassy rocks crushed up on a Basquiat
This tragic plot had ravaged him with acid drops - falling deeper in memory
He meets his previous pieces, he was handsome reaching to destiny

Originally Posted by Pent uP

A few would question the hot and cold, but some saw the yin and yang.
They said the imagery was layered, but as they read it quickly sank –
and sank in, (I thanked them), before they were buried by the snow storm:
A metaphor of emotions covered the frozen prairie while I’d go forth.

2. El Pancake beats Mike Wrecka 8-(-4). | Just After Sunset
Well, Mike Wrecka has felt slighted lately, and he wrote about it in a verse that felt loosely tied in to the topic. He also wrote about 15 bars and organized it to only take up eight lines, which was kind of dirty. I liked what Mike Wrecka wrote, but it didn't work in this context. So El Pancake walked away with an easy win, not that he needed it. He beautifully and sensually described heroin use with some of the most intricate language of the tournament.

Originally Posted by El Pancake

The rush of ; flush veins, a dose of medical pills
on a couch colored ‘1970’s film’. Chartreuse and brown.
Holding steady, the thrill. Our heads, cumulus clouds.
The semblance of touch, brushing of flesh tuned in and out

Originally Posted by Mike Wrecka

all the years I've spent toiling, honing my craft, to overcome those foes hoping I would choke and then crash,
means nothing to the people that are probing my past, but my legacy is golden as the ocean is vast,
so you must be joking I laugh, I was chosen to draft, when I won the championship I left them frozen, aghast ,
but now its like their memory has been broken and smashed, while Certain critics try to diminish, bringing up the notion of graphs,

3. oats beats Diode 10-(-4). | A Face in the Crowd
These two made the same point in vastly different ways; "macro vs. micro," Diode put it. Diode's birthing imagery didn't quite stick the way he'd hoped, a product of a few awkward phrases. That led to his point being a bit rushed into. oats also sort of rushed us into his point at the end, but he took a broader view of the universe and dropped some knowledge with his verse about our insignificance. His verse also stood out for its mechanical prowess.

Originally Posted by oats

First there was only one Sun, the pinnacle of majesty!
...except for all the other solar systems riddled through the galaxy
Surely the Milky Way's unique - the epicentral pulse at work!
Just ignore the rest of them (and for god's sake don't dare say there's a multiverse...)

Originally Posted by Diode

symbiotic symbol of their affection, hopes, and dreams
comes into being breathing, bleating - turns to gasp, and screams
another face is born to live out another hundred years
and with a sudden swiftness, into the crowd, it disappears

4. kannon beats jilti 7-1. | Blood and Smoke
Our last underdog, jilti's run came to a halt with this battle. His verse was about the interpretations of scripture that predict the end of the world, and that enormous concept labored under the 10-line maximum. kannon had a clever and more approachable take on the topic, citing Notorious B.I.G.'s fourth crack commandment about getting high on your own supply. But he mostly won because his writing was crisp and nuanced, showcasing his cleverness.

Originally Posted by kannon

From where I stand at, his blood filled the cracks in the granite
Broke his nose, cause my brother broke that fourth commandment
The duct tape dug in his wrists as he struggled to break free
Broken bones in place of broken trust, covered in kerosene

Originally Posted by jilti

an undertone overshadowing Passover and Jewish feast of the Tabernacles
2015, the 28th day of September when the last of four lunar eclipses form a tetrad fractal
coinciding with a supernatural act of God from the bible verse Matthew 24:29
"After tribulations of those days, the heavens shall shake as stars fall from the sky"

5. Split beats Cormier 4-3. | Firestarter
I had no idea who would end up winning this when the verses were posted. It was the first I read because I was talking to Split at the time. Cormier had an absolutely brilliant concept, but he didn't really take it anywhere. Split had a cool story concept that could have used another few lines to create some emotional attachment. But I think Split outwrote Cormier here, particularly in how well he closed his verse, in a battle that was close but also didn't show either's best work.

Originally Posted by Split

Everyone knows. I would've married her.
But my friend John seemed as good a match as any-
and knowing her, despite my mattress envy...
thank God I'm not growing colder in a controlled burn.

Originally Posted by Cormier

Fuck Bill! Fuck the Bobs! And most importantly, fuck Initech!
Who just lets someone learn they’re laid off when they stop getting checks?
But now I have traveler’s checks to make my vacation days so swell
This is a great hotel! Who would have thought that arson would pay so well?

6. Darth Yoda wins via Orc no-show. | It
With Orc's no-show appearing imminent, Darth Yoda didn't craft his very best work here but did put together a fascinating take on the topic. The thing that really gets me is that his last line could be interpreted as a reveal or as an extension. The repetition and variation drove home the theme and added power to the words, showing one of the advantages of the short format. And the rhyming was great.

Originally Posted by Darth Yoda

It is a diabolical plot, slightly volatile product, signed in a modular slot
It is tiny molecule wattage. Cyanide and lozenge to pop. It's illogical.
It is the phenomenal, slyly prodigal homage to spectacular speech
It's the vernacular beach, where words wave away immaculate sea

7. Eŋg wins via Pinot Grij no-show. | Sleepwalkers
As expected, Eŋg wrote one of the most tightly wound and constructed verses of the week. I thought it could have been a bit more accessible and perhaps pulled back a little on the simple rhymes in favor of more complex ones. But that's being nitpicky, and the social commentary was so strong that it worked. Pinot Grij disappointingly no-showed in what surely would have been a great clash of styles.

Originally Posted by Eŋg

Probably propaganda; lots of anger, wobbled banners, stocks collapse or
cops with badges popping hammers to stop the clamour. Start the camera

-- drop the videotape; stiffen your gait as the video plays
on a loop, but the truth is you’re still in one place: playing dead.

8. trap wins via Frank no-show. | Night Shift
Well, Frank no-showing didn't exactly surprise anyone. But it did mean trap advanced without any opposition. He took on the topic with a clever twist on the phrase. His verse was very direct in its delivery but also felt complete, a concept delivered in proper adherence in 10 lines. So while I rank this battle last, it still was very much worth the read.

Originally Posted by trap

A vision I depict is of the lands beyond my grasp
Jungle, snow, and sand ... castles to expand my wrath
Until then, it's me, myself, and I; dreaming 'pon the wall
A knights shift during the night shift, most boring of them all

TOP 5 VERSES by Split, oats and Certain
Two others decided to chip in with their responses, which was much appreciated. oats and I let Split handle commentary.





Split's picks

5. Cormier
I loved this take on the topic, the simplicity was rewarding and everything fell together smoothly. A touch of comedy helped, perhaps it's only flaw was it relied too heavily on an outside inspiration for its identity.

4. Pent uP
Great verse about the catharsis of the writing process, I thought this was one of the most self-contained verses of the tournament. It didn't attempt anything outside of its 10-line scope that it wasn't capable of, felt grounded, and did some nice conceptual work within its grounds.

3. Soulstice
Beautifully layered metaphors and imagery. Some adjectives were strangely used but not improperly used, imo. Good abstractions that filled in as the verse progressed- representing the payoff that Soul took with his ambitious figurative language.

2. oats
This verse was a powerhouse, illustrated the topic masterfully. Very minimal slip-ups and Oats maintained that feeling that he was ahead you by a step or two. Really satisfying conclusion, as well.

1. El Pancake
thought PCB killed it this round. The imagery was expertly executed, and in fact almost every aspect of the verse seemed to be well under the author's control. Especially enjoyed the skin pops/ pinpricks/ instant/ pindrop/ distance progression, probably my favorite use of rhyme schemes in a recent work.


oats' picks

5. Split

4. Eŋg

3. Pent uP

2. El Pancake

1. Soulstice


Certain's picks

5. kannon

4. Darth Yoda

3. El Pancake

2. Soulstice

1. Pent uP



BRACKETOLOGY by Adonis, Certain, El Pancake and oats
We'll be keeping track of these opening picks throughout the tournament with a leaderboard. The scoring will be unweighted by seeding, but with escalating points by round. Blue underlines mean the person is getting credit for the reserve's success, as it didn't seem fair to not allow for reserves to count.





1. oats, 23 points

He surges to the front because his lower bracket is perfect thus far, but he has some bad news ahead because he's already lost his runner-up in dead man (replaced by Frank, who then no-showed). Still, he put his money on himself.




2. El Pancake, 22 points

Pinot Grij's no-show hurts him, so perhaps he shouldn't have been so selfless in projecting his own defeat in the quarterfinals. But he's got his finalists still alive. Darth Yoda is his ticket at this point.




3. Certain, 20 points

Three of his four upset picks for the semifinals are still alive. Now he needs them to come through against higher-seeded opponents.




4. Adonis, 19 points

He picked half of the round right, but losing Pinot Grij is a killer. He still could do well if oats loses and kannono reaches the finals. But his hopes are pretty dim at the moment.





Quarterfinals Preview
EIGHT MEN IN/
LISTEN UP by Certain
An audio analysis of the eight quarterfinalists, listing them from least likely to win it all to most.






PREDICTIONS by Certain
We celebrate "Buddy Holly" with a batch of Weezer topics and one of the most stacked quarterfinal rounds I've ever seen. Yes, I took the coward's way out with the odds.





8. trap vs. 5. kannon | The Good Life
trap writes about retirement since he's so close. kannon writes about becoming a hip-hop DJ for the world's last FM radio station. The readers are enrapt by how efficiently these two managed their 12-line space. If anything, trap's verse could have been shorter. Every word in kannon's verse is perfectly placed for maximum appeal, so everyone says it feels inauthentic because only hipsters are left. trap's verse has a more rugged and emotional appeal, like a man with cracked hands and black lungs. Prediction: trap 51-49.


3. Split vs. 2. Darth Yoda | Photograph
Darth Yoda litters his room with dozens of Polaroids from all around Europe and Asia and Latin America depicting sightings of the one true God, who ends up being Darth Yoda. Split goes deep into a dark room to develop film even though he's nowhere near old enough to have ever needed to use a dark room. Split's hobby diverges in its path from Darth Yoda's deification. Nostalgia seeps through Split's pores, and readers can relate but also don't put all the pieces together. No one fully gets what Darth Yoda's verse accomplishes except dead baby, but everyone is stunned by the phrasing and rhymes. Prediction: Darth Yoda 51-49.


1. El Pancake vs. 5. Eŋg | Why Bother?
El Pancake goes full-angst and writes his verse from inside a linen closet while not speaking to anyone in order to fully tap into his reserve of emotions. He ingests nothing but Jack Daniels for three days in preparation. Drunk PancakeBrah's return is a boon to the Discussion board. Eŋg takes the exact opposite approach, sitting on a bench near a football stadium and writing about the pointlessly inane lives of the people he sees. Both of these verses are deeply introverted and angry, but Internet rappers better relate to not seeing anyone rather than hating everyone they see. Prediction: El Pancake 51-49.


6. Soulstice vs. 2. oats | Only in Dreams
oats takes a few hits of Korean kush, which actually is a tobacco varient with no mind-altering influences at all because that's illegal in South Korea and drugs will get you shipped to North Korea to become Kim Jong Eun's sex slave. The result is a verse about how only by following dreams will any of us reach our full potential. Soulstice finds a rose petal in the middle of his street one morning and can't figure out where it came from, as there are no rose bushes nearby. He imagines it must be an apparation from a dream and writes about cobblestone roads. oats' positivity sickens the remaining cynics, particularly Eŋg. Prediction: Soulstice 51-49.



Great Eight or Elite Eight?
CONCLUSION


Let's make this round memorable. I need some hip-hop to close this magazine out.

[oats]

dope shit, as usual. little disappointed about the lack of flirty conversation but 20+ minutes of just your verse is always appreciated

[trap]

Awesome as usual. Which CES Cru track did you post? My phone isn't letting me look at embedded youtube vids at the moment.

[big baby]

cerain u should floss cuz even do teeth clean floss is 4 gums u dun wan diryuy gumz itll hurt at first and u might bleed but after 2 weeks the pain goes away and ur mouf feel betta trust db da bb

[Certain]

Originally Posted by trap

Awesome as usual. Which CES Cru track did you post? My phone isn't letting me look at embedded youtube vids at the moment.

"Sound Bite."

[trap]

Cool, saw it from my virus riddled laptop.

[kannon]

Dope mag. I listened to the audio portion on my drive to work this morning.

[PancakeBrah]

I listened to it at work. It's kind of surreal. I usually listen to 'normal' podcasts. To have Netcees pumped into my brain during work was a 4th wall moment of sorts.

Dope magazine, per usual.
@dead baby for Semifinal Predictions yamean

[big baby]

also 4 times is a lot cause it can ake off enamel off teeth equaly beed certain dun do dat idiyote fucka shut up certain

[Certain]

Originally Posted by dead baby

also 4 times is a lot cause it can ake off enamel off teeth equaly beed certain dun do dat idiyote fucka shut up certain

I use Crest Pro Health during the day and Sensodyne at night. But I'm going to start flossing so that my gums are healthy.

[Split]

Sesnodyne is that good

Haven't listened to any of the audio bits so I'll probably do that. Nice mag. I'm trying to post less.

[big baby]

Originally Posted by Split

Sesnodyne is that good

Haven't listened to any of the audio bits so I'll probably do that. Nice mag. I'm trying to post less.

Posts: 8,656

[Split]

Most of my posts are short and contentless. Like this one. They rack up quick.

[Soulstice]

thanks for the mag dope shit

[big baby]

Originally Posted by Soulstice

thanks for the mag dope shit

certun not a dope shit u idiyote jerk face wun fit bb bish idiyote soulstic eugly topicd00d bish iapolgo

[Split]

"Eng is a better Open Mic writer than a topicalist"

nah. Eng is the most akin to a poet we have here

[Split]

I think im pretty good with combining sounds tbh

EDIT: kannon continually impresses. how is this dude not an AOWL regular?

[Split]

nigga i did invent 10-line verses. no NYCSPITZ

[Split]

"Split Eight vs. Darth Yoda in the Elite Eight would be heat"

[Eŋg]

Originally Posted by Split

nah. Eng is the most akin to a poet we have here

bold is questionable, but i don't disagree with either of you in that i wrote poetry before rhymecentric free verse, and feel confined by 'topicals'.

this was a great magazine, btw, but i haven't had a chance to listen to the audio portion - i'll prioritize it if you've said good things about me.

i'm going to listen to mono and scratch a verse in a bit. will definitely post tonight @El Pancake