Big Ghost: 2nd Annual Top 10 Softest Rappers In The Game

[TYSON]

Big Bhost: 2nd Annual Top 10 Softest Rappers In The Game

Yeah at the rate that these wack niggas is fallin from the sky who can really wait a whole year n shit son? Whattup yalls. P-Tone aka the Mighty Fists of Hercules is back in the buildin nahmean. Welcome to the 2nd Annual Softest Niggas In The Game countdown yall. To keep this shit fair I aint gon mention no niggas from the first time around n shit. So now that we got the formalities out the way lets get into this shit. Word.

10. Lupe Fiasco

Ayo before Lasers son was jus ya typical above average sorta corny semi fruity but definitely lyrical ass rapper nahmean. He wasnt like the most incredible nigga breathin or nothin like that but son was still kinda nice namsayin. Then the niggas label started playin games wit his mind n shit…n long story short…he decided what he was gon do was make the lost C&C Music Factory album or some shit. You can feel feathers flyin out the speakers when those songs is playin son. This nigga makin will.i.am. seem like DMX yo. Lupe more delicate than paper panties rite now namsayin. If that snow nigga Tobey Maguire started rappin tomorrow Im pretty sure his album would sound a lot like Lasers yo. But the little homie probably gon bounce back from that corny shit when he drop FNL 2. Word is bond. Thats why he at the bottom of this list n shit. But til then I aint givin a frozen fuck bout this nigga.

9. J Cole

Its too bad yo cos son started out kinda ill nahmean. He still got potential but niggas aint jus gon 1) wait forever for son to come up wit a single that aint trash so that his label can finally greenlight his album n 2) let this nigga slowly transform into the nex Drizzy…like we aint noticin that bullshit. Let me make this clear tho…son IS NOT wack. But he IS softer than babys breath namsayin. I dont think theres ever been a nigga that talked bout all the shit he had to overcome on so many different songs namsayin. This nigga jus dont stop havin that chip on his shoulder. I dont mean like how M.O.P. got chips on they shoulders tho….I mean like how ya girl wanna have a serious talk bout her feelings 5 minutes into game 7 chip on his shoulder. Son is bitter yo. What the fuck you so mad bout son? Like all ya stars aint already aligned n shit. I hate a emotional ass nigga. Sons only a few music note tattoos away from bein a full blown bitch yo. But like I said he a talented little nigga so hopefully he stops actin like a human tampon n learns to lighten up. Cos I wanna see son do good forreal nahmean.

8. T.I.

This aint 2005 g. This nigga is a whole different animal rite now. Paper Trail was actually cool but sons been goin downhill ey since that time yall. Maybe thats got to do wit the some the lame moves he made after he got outta jail. Lets jus face summa these facts tho. No Mercy was audio nyquil son. If you listen close you could actually hear snoring in the background through all those songs n shit b. Nigga give the Crime Stoppers shit a rest….stop gettin knocked for stupid shit….stop weepin in courtrooms…stop tryin to get niggas to rock that Akoo bullshit….n jus make another What You Know. N please yo…no more of these “inspirational” joints when you get released again g. We get it yo. Cmon Clifford. Either chill wit all that progesterone shit or jus hop into your little cloud car n drive ya ass back to Care-a-lot n leave rap alone til ya manhood re-emerges or some shit nahmean.

7. B.oB.

Son I wanna make it real clear that I dont hate this nigga. But he still soft as fuck yo. This that nigga that you see in the classroom carvin hearts wit arrows goin thru em on his desk. Son probably rocks cereal jewelry. I think that he be wantin to prove that he aint actually that tender tho namsayin. So he tried to get some beef to pop off wit that Tyler the Creator nigga. Thats like bein at a new school n wantin to show the other kids that you aint no bitch nigga so you go stomp some kid from the special ed class. I jus cant condone this niggas actions b. Like I said tho Tone aint got no hatred for this dude…but he really do seem like the type a nigga that would find a wounded butterfly n repair its wing n shit nahmean. Sons a meadow dweller. The nigga probably serenades birds n squirrels namsayin.

6. Puffy

Thanks for Biggie son…..but please get the fuck outta here. Puff is like the nigga at the party that wont go home. Notice the joint was called “Coming Home”….cos the nigga never actually GOES home namsayin. No nigga on the face of the earth has stuck around while doin almost nothin of importance for this long b. I think we was good after No Way Out son. You aint need to drop 4 other full albums after that tho. You coulda left b.Niggas coulda lived without Danity Kane n Ciroc. Son been on W.U.S.H status for a minute namsayin but I aint even frontin on the soft ass eurotrashCirque du Soleilmusic he makin. Sons on this list cos his moistness levels has been percolatin like a muthafucka. This niggas blood is almost all champagne now. That might sound like some fly shit but you can see what the actual results is yaself namsayin.

5. Swizz Beatz

Aka Snoop Budden. Aka the rap Pau Gasol. Aka the McRib of hip hop. Aka the human yeast infection. Get this niggas dusty ass the fuck outta here already. Son cant contain his softness. The niggas favorite color is rainbow. The nigga only has two facial expressions: Jus been raped or bout to rape somebody. The nigga always either looks like he bout to violate a broad/nigga or he looks like the picture on a missing dog poster. This nigga made the same beat for the first 4 years of his career son. Now he jus the only nigga alive tryin to duplicate Diddy Dirty Money. Get him the fuck outta here.

4. Chris Breezy Brown aka Young Ike Turner aka the most emotional nigga alive aka FUCK THIS NIGGAS LIFE.

I kno son aint a rapper…but how many these niggas really is anyway? The nigga coulda easily been #1 on the list but the competition kinda stiff (pause) these days yo. Son looks like he closes his eyes when he brushes his teeth nahmean. This is the type a nigga that wraps his mouth on the outside of the bottle when he has a beer. I hate this soft serve nigga wit my entire heart (pause) son. Get this pantyhose hearted nigga out my site b.

3. Mac Miller

If Hobbits rapped this is what they shit would sound like. I cant believe niggas actually listen to this toothpaste niggas music yo. Forreal forreal. This dude wrestles kittens yo.Son probably owns a giga pet namsayin. If you slapped this dude it would probably sound like glass breakin.Son celebrated when the wicked witch got the house dropped on her b. Son probably lives in a mushshroom or some shit. Somebody needs to pour this milk dud midget muthafucka back into his Aveeno bottle n throw that shit into the ocean.

2. Yung Berg

Ayo this nigga dodged a bullet on the last list g. But only cos I forgot he existed n shit nahmean. But sons been makin all these power fails n gettin hisself back into the public eye n whatever. Son is the worst kind a soft nigga cos he dont even kno he soft nahmean. If reincarnation was real this nigga would come back as play doh son. Real talk. Son makes you wanna beat the porridge outta him. Thats why this nigga gets slapped at least twice a week yo. If you cant remember the punchline to a joke all you gotta say is “Yung Berg” n you gon get the same laughs anyway nahmean. Somebody needs to douche this niggas entire life son.

1. Aubrey

Aka the Ryan Seacrest of rap. Son is the safest nigga on earth. This the type a NAHGGER that old rich white men try to set up wit they daughters n shit. This nigga wasnt born yo….he was blossomed. When he aint startin pillow fights on tour n pollinatin flowers n shit son stays spittin wit that tenderized Stephen Hawking voice. The niggas heart got a ponytail. Son could probably make you any origami animal you ask him to namsayin. He the type a nigga to sprinkle rose pedals on his bed before he go to sleep n shit. Son could probably frost a cake usin his eyes nahmean.This niggas moms n pops basically got Rick Rolled when the doctor said “Its a boy!”But it aint like Tone wanna see the nigga get torn to pieces by a pack a wolves n shit. If I seen him would the god wanna beat the garnier fructis outta him? I dont kno b. Maybe?

By the way the homegirl @FeFeGirlWonder on twitter mighta said it best when she told me Aubrey was a pre-cum baby. Word.

Aight peace.

[TYSON]

http://rapsandhustles.com/2011/05/11...s-in-the-game/

[PancakeBrah]

Gone

[Diode]

Originally Posted by PancakeBrah

Gone

you have seriously never seen anything from Big Ghost Chronicles?

SERIOUSLY?????

[Diode]

i bet @TYSON thinks GFK actually wrote this

i bet i time traveled and here i am in lime green in the pre-lamaian era

[PancakeBrah]

I lol'd/died @ the post. That's all. Thought the content was funny. Don't know what you're on about.

[Diode]

Originally Posted by PancakeBrah

I lol'd/died @ the post. That's all. Thought the content was funny. Don't know what you're on about.

...

@Captain Obvious

[PancakeBrah]

Lol'd @ op again

[TYSON]

Originally Posted by Diode

i bet @TYSON thinks GFK actually wrote this

i bet i time traveled and here i am in lime green in the pre-lamaian era

Bitch stfu and laugh!!!

[TYSON]

Look @Diode and those like him. I posted this for the lol's and dont see how u cant laugh at it. I dont care if its authentic cause nigga its funny...

[El Muffin]

Lol.

Great read.

Lol @ yung berg excerpt

This nigga dodged a bullet only coz last time I forgot he existed nomsayin

Pre cum baby roflz



And I never seen this b4

[Tom Sparks]

This is old.. But it's still roflz

[Sharp]

lmao

[Certain]

This is the latest version, for those interested: http://bigghostlimited.com/big-ghost...s-in-the-game/

Ayo whattup… Its ya boy Big Ghost aka the new Russell Simmons aka Acrobatic Chromosomes aka the legendary Phantom Raviolis aka Thor Molecules aka Shampoo Bracelets the panty melter aka Galaxy Knuckles the great aka the mighty Hands of Zeus n all that good shit. Welcome back to the realms of flyness known as the Cappuccino Lounge. Allow yaself to caress the luxurious fur sofas n velvet walls of these paragraphs n enjoy the parables nahmean. Some yall been waitin on this shit for a minute n I apologize for all that. Word yo…its that time of year where we give credit where its due n honor the softest muthafuckas in this here game. Aint no clear definition for what makes a nigga soft b…but the best one I can give yall is its usually got to do wit some corny muthafuckas steppin way the fuck out they lane doin this that n the third to try to prove they NOT some hoe ass dandelion blowers n achievin the opposite effect in the process namsayin. Its some lambs in wolves clothing type shit. So we not here to talk bout will.i.am corny ass or Bruno Mars or Flo Rida… Them cats do what they do n stay in they lanes. That shit dont necessarily affect nobody really. Some yall be cryin foul cuz Macklemore won the Grammy that Kendrick shoulda won n he did it by makin songs bout homosexual lovin n shoppin at thrift stores n whatever (AND BY NOT BEIN BLACK)…yet nobody really tryna light his ass up or throw him on a list like this. Fam…in this hip hop shit…what duke was sayin was like jumpin in front of some bullets usin a tablespoon as a shield. Homie said YO WE SHOULD LET GAY FOLK GET MARRIED N YO BTW I COPPED THIS FUR AT GOOD WILL…NOW IMMA DO A SONG BOUT WHITE WALLS ON MY WHIP. Call that shit calculated or foul or whatever….call the Grammy voters some clowns for favoring white artists…but dont tell me dude soft. Not gon say I agree wit his beliefs or not cuz thats a whole different convo but you gotta be brave as fuck to be on that shit yo. NIGGA YOU WANT MEN TO MARRY MEN AAAAAAAAND YOU ROCKIN SECOND HAND GEAR???!! YO YOU BRAVE AS FUCK FOR A RAPPER B. That nigga Flo Rida be makin some the most wack ass songs on the planet but 1) dude look like he be dead liftin volkswagens n 2) he dont go from makin his hoe ass dance songs to bein on some YO IMMA BUST NIGGAS IN THEY HEADS IF THEY COME AT ME WRONG type shit. He jus stay on some Barney the purple dinosaur shit n be makin songs for drunk people wit bad taste in music n low standards in life nahmean. So thats some outlines for yall so you dont gotta get confused n wonder why Justin Timberlake suit n tie ass not on this bitch but such n such nigga is. Thats actually a perfect example of what Im sayin tho bruh… The grown man JT who stays makin his little grown man records n dabbles in that blue eyed soul shit jus doin his thing n gettin his paper bruh. That lame ass cornrow rockin fuckboy from the early 2000s who use to go outta his way to niggafy his whole corny boy band image never ever got a pass…yanno? If he was still that dude he woulda been top 5 on this shit. Anyways yall get the point n if you dont who the fuck cares… Its my list. If yall dont agree you can keep it movin. Go scroll thru 100 slides on a Complex list or some shit. So without further ado lets go down the list of this years honorees n whatever…



10. Mike Will Made It – Not gon lie b…I fucks wit some Mike Will Made It produced shit here n there…but you wanna talk one-dimensional corny ass lame dudes that stay hypin up some wack ass culture vultures n opened the floodgates for the Katy Perrys n the Biebers to get on some coon shit its some muthafuckas like Mike Will Made It who do that shit yo. But what more you gon expect from somebody who actually be enjoyin puttin whatever his equivalent of a dick is anywhere near Miley’s lobster claw lookin ass. Standards on a negative HUNDRED…THOUSAND… TRILLION my nigga. If all it took to have this house nigga ever so whipped was a 86 lb snowthot who looks like Justin Bieber’s long lost twin brother how you gon expect this trick to stand tall when the revolution come? Get this shuckin n jivin ass deformed Bun B lookin muthafucka outtahere bruh.



9. Lupe Fiasco – Nothin against the homie Wasalu but he need to get his mind right yo. Son is on some wild insecure shit…actin like he done read every book ever written n be like a 87th degree black belt in over 14 different martial arts forms… Like he wasnt at the local YMCA takin Kung Fu classes like some regular niggas be doin. Nigga you wasnt sparrin wit stunt doubles from old Run Run Shaw movies durin ya childhood n pullin rickshaws in Shanghai n gettin paid in wontons…sleepin on hot dim sum baskets n steel chopsticks to learn how to ignore pain n whatever. You wasnt wrestlin komodo dragons n catchin scorpions wit ya teeth…or some shit that goes beyond what regular niggas learn at they little Karate dojos. Like FOR EXAMPLE I personally been conditioned to ignore the signals from my brain that that tell my body that a sword done pierced thru my flesh n shit like that nahmean. You aint on that level bruh bruh. If you was then how come when it come to shit that really matters…like not comin across like a fuckboy on social media sites you jus cannot do that shit yo? M’man Lu be doin sucker shit all damn day b… Homie be like the kid at the playground that breathes thru his mouth n always be outta breath n brings all his toys out to make friends n then get mad n take all his toys home n cry a bucket of tears into his pillow n then draw pictures of all the muthafuckas he gon slay wit his lightsaber someday. Dont get me wong yo…son can rap but he be actin like a bird…lockin his twitter n shit like that. The nigga also be dressin like a combination of Ellen n Morpheus yo. Anytime he out in public he be lookin like he jus got outta a long term relationship wit Erykah Badu. Except he aint did that. Stop all foolishness son.



8. Hopsin – This corny nigga gets a lifetime pass for INFINITE fuckouttaheres bruh.



7. Roscoe Dash – This nigga so weak n delicate that a slight breeze from somebody walkin by him could knock him over yo…. Nigga lighter than a Japanese paper lantern or some shit. You could probably poke a hole thru him witta rolled up newspaper b. Ionno what it is but anytime I see this nigga face I jus be feelin violent namsayin. I wanna smack him so hard that Sierra Mist gon shoot out his ass n spiral the nigga body n make him cartwheel for like 5 or 6 city blocks…lookin like those colorful water sprinklers little white kids be jumpin thru on they lawns in commercials n shit. I still aint never allowed my ears to be tortured by any more Roscoe songs or verses ever again after the All The Way Turnt Up shit but jus knowin this nigga still allowed to make music is enough reason for me to be feelin some type of way n say enough is enough yo…



6. Kid Ink – Only thing worse than actually being a degenerate like Chris Brown or Tyga is being a hybrid of some degenerates like Chris Brown n Tyga. Ionno who started this trend of skinny ass cats gettin as many tattoos as they possibly can n coverin every single inch of they fuckboy bodies wit ink before they 18th birthdays but that shit done run its course b. Second of all if you gon be that frontin ass sucker that gets they whole torso inked up wit all types of shit that dont mean one muthafuckin thing to you jus so you can feel like you really some type of belligerent muthafucka after that….have the decency to not call yaself “Kid Ink” doggie. Like you jus gon ride that gimmick n act like you really the ONLY tatted up little nigga weighin 78 lbs runnin round out chea… OH THE SKINNY LITTLE MARMOT LOOKIN ASS NIGGA WIT THE TATS? OH THATS THAT NIGGA KID INK. HE THE ONLY NIGGA RUNNIN ROUND LOOKIN LIKE SOMEBODY HAD MADE A HUMAN BEING OUTTA SOME CHICKEN BONES N CHRIS BROWN’S HEAD. How the fuck yall take this slightly less trash Tyga replica seriously yo? Son…you a knockoff version of one the wackest if not THEE wackest muthafucka that ever inhaled oxygen on this planet. How that sound? To make shit even more corny you also look like a underdeveloped version of the poster child for domestic abuse/human highlight reel for grown man tantrums n Drake’s former arch nemesis hisself. Sons monkey ass looks like how Breezy would look if he was left out in the rain overnight n somebody used a blow dryer to dry him off n the nigga shrunk by 20% or some shit. Never mind the fact that every single this 4:5 scale Breezy replica puts out sounds like he aimin directly for the heart of some 14 yr old future stripper. Fuckouttahere wit all that beige nigga shit b.



5. Wiz Khalifa – Where do you really start wit this nigga yo? The list is so vast n endless that he probably gon commit at least 100 fuckboyish acts before I finish typin this paragraph b. Son’s life is like a whole galaxy of adolescent female emotions n Demi Lovato lyrics clustered into one organism n brought to life by a stoner praying mantis/parody of a rapper who was sent to Earth by the Gungans of planet Naboo to detonate some kinda male dignity transmission override all over the planet n keep niggas from wearin pants that aint 7 sizes too small. He got little niggas dressin on some wild ambiguous shit yo. Son must got stipulations in his record contract that say he gotta flat out dress like a broad nahmean. Nigga got hers n hers matchin attire to go wit whatever Amber Rose wearin n shit. Son jus be slippin into some faded jeans that got a 18″ waist n 26″ length n throw a trasluscent half top n some straw sandals on n tie a chiffon scarf round his neck n step out the house ready to blossom another flower bed of theme songs for dignity deficient new niggas n hoes that got Ariana Grande quotes in they twitter bios. I fuck wit summa this fool Cameron’s music but son jus be goin too far outta his way to test the boundaries of masculinity while at the same time actin like he on some boss shit too. You aint a boss…you jussa thot Wiz. Find ya father b.



4. Kirko Bangz aka Great Value Drake – This nigga look like he scissors wit WNBA players n got some shit tatted on his lower back yo. Its like somebody made they own Drake outta paper mache n wet cornflakes n programmed Drizzy’s voice into the nigga or some shit. Its like somebody took all the worst elements of Drake n left out anything close to talent or skill n let the muthafucka run wild in the studio n have a career cuz YALL NIGGAS IS STUPID N GON BUY ANYFUCKINTHING ANYWAYS.



3. Drake - Like any true magenta blooded Canadian/teen soap opera star/future R&B chanteuse …the boy Aubrey had dreams of bein the next great Canadian music phenomenon (think Celine Dion, KD Lang, Shania Twain, Bieberveli, Michael Buble, Snow, The Backyardigans etc). Welp… that nigga musta spent a fortune on wishes at every fountain he ever came across cuz here he is. I still refuse to believe this nigga Drake was born thru any kinda normal human birth or anything like that… Feel like this nigga jus appeared on a lilypad one morning in a pond in his moms back yard inside of a dewdrop or some shit. I picture this nigga asleep inside of a drop of sunshine gently slidin down a golden maple tree from one leaf to the next one morning n then falling onto the wing of a canary n bein carried off on a feather n whimsically slippin down to that pond surrounded by swans n geese n squirrels bathing n shit…n then his moms was hearin these little squeakin sounds n stepped off her patio where she was enjoyin her rose hip tea n poppyseed bagel n seen this thumb sized winged hamster witta afro in her pond n carried it into the house n put it inside of a shoebox on top of a bed of cotton balls n babys breath n knitted little leotards n hats for it. Anyways Im pretty sure that shit gotta be at least 80% accurate…



2. Justin Bieber – aka Snow Brother # 1 aka The Human Dick Piercing aka The Other Miley aka KKK Grand Wizard Local 613 Canadian Division. This snow coon need to NOT be doin like 8 million different things he usually be doin namsayin. This muthafucka softer than a garden of marshmallows…yet somehow some way yall be lettin this human bubble bath slide by witta all access hood pass n he jus be runnin wild wit that shit yo. Yall rap niggas made that shit ten times more fucked up b. Yall had this lotion nugget ass muthafucka posin in pictures throwin up gang signs wit no shirt on…wearin grills…rubbin his vag muffin against Nicki Minaj’s ass on stage…basically doin everything BUT havin sucky fucky relations wit Mike Will Made It (“allegedly”)… But then the muthafucka came out at Coachella in a Schoolboy Q costume n took niggafy’in his whole shit up to the next level n yall was like…”Hmmm”… Then that video of him tellin a niggER joke when he was a young girl came outta nowhere n yall was like “Hold on a sec”… Then the OTHER video of him singin a whole song bout niggERs popped up n yalls was like “Ok maybe we was wrong bout this muthafucka…”. Get this frozen tater tot lookin ass fuckboy extraordinaire outta here yo.



1. Tyga aka Grand Master Trash – First off I gotta address the fact that this rodent fetus lookin dick breather got the most punchable face on God’s green earth. I aint jus sayin that to be disrespectful neither yo…I mean that shit. Look at this marsupial ass muthafucka’s face n tell me you dont wanna break a Nebuchadnezzar sized champagne bottle on his grill. I be havin actual daydreams where I slap the duck sauce out this muthafucka sometimes yo. I gotta slap his mosquito larvae lookin ass back to the Paleolithic age. I wanna slap this fool so hard that every version of his future self in every year between now n whenever gon feel it n be like YO WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT N WHY THE WHOLE LEFT SIDE OF MY FACE SWOLE UP N MY TEETH IS ALL FALLIN OUT RIGHT NOW? Main reason why I dont like this bird ass nigga is cuz 1) his songs is wild trash n 2) he stay doin wild corny shit. When this fool got hisself into some “predicaments” wit Lil Durk n Durk was basically gon have some crazy ass Chiraq niggas comin for his soul at some point the nigga Michael Ray Nguyen aint handle that shit like a man he went runnin to Game n hid behind that nigga instead. This fool jus brought in a nigga who aint had nothin to do wit the shit n hid behind him like a bitch. Then Durk n Game crossed paths after the BET awards n ended up makin peace n this tatted up twinkie went back to bein ass out all overagain. Pretty sure its only a matter of time before somebody close to Durk sends this nigga back to the essence b… This nigga jus all types of corny n stay jumpin on trends n basically got no idea of his own at all b. When niggas was fuckin wit molly his lame ass made a song called “Molly”. Then hookah was poppin n all a sudden this nigga got a song called “Hookah”. Never mind the fact that the nigga thinks he can enlarge his doodles n say he channelin Basquiat. Man yall need to get this cockroach the fuck outta here already.

So there yall have it. Theres ya new crowned prince of hoe ass niggadom. Hope yall spend the day free of the sounds of these soft ass muthafuckas n listen to some shit thats worth ya time instead. Until next year…Im done wit this shit.

[El Muffin]

Deathhhh

[anime_boners]

Big Ghost =/= Ghostface

but these are always funny

[TYSON]

Thank u @Certain for the contribution of roflz

[El Muffin]

Died @ crack a Nebuchadnezzar sized champagne bottle over his head

Iono how thats related but death regardless

[Strikta]

The drake one had me dying.

[Zen]

Bieberveli

lol