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Old 09-22-2020, 12:07 PM   #1
sral
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Exclamation THE OFFICIAL BLACK AUGUST II ROUND ONE MAGAZINE!!!!!!! LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!



Black August II Topical Tournament
Round One Magazine!


Welcome back, NCG’s!

We in here, chea! Finally. We made it, though. Thank you to everyone that’s still checking for this shit foremost, you guys put on for the culture and I respect that. Salute to you all my G’s. The first round took wayyyyyyy longer than I anticipated, I’m not even gonna lie, that was tough going but in the end we had five out of our eight battles go down, shouts to the big homie @Zuch who continues to drop constant heat everywhere across the board even when changing dirty diapers and being no-showed. He takes the no-show shine slot for this round, somewhat unfortunately, as I would have enjoyed seeing him face an opponent but alas - it wasn’t to be this round. We had SEVEN people no show which is pretty sad to see given the names involved, at least User had the good grace to let me know early on so I could try and replace him. I managed to save three battles at least in arranging short notice replacements for @Candy, @UserName and @Hades but the last minute let downs included two double no-shows which really created a headache for round two. Anyway, let’s not give those guys any more time or space than they deserve here, let’s focus instead on those that came through and helped make this tournament happen. It was an eventful first round to say the least. Lemme hit you with that Round One Recap real quick...

Round One Re-Cap!

The first round was enough to give even me a headache. Jeez! We got six winners, with two spots needing filling to ensure a second round could continue. There was a @Universe sighting who wanted to battle @dead man in round two, but it was never agreed upon by both parties. A resurgent @NYCSPITZ figured he could jump right back in against dead man for some reason also, despite him no-showing in round one and eliminating himself. Deadman had agreed to this one, but I just couldn’t bring myself to allow NYCSpitz another opportunity at the expense of far more trusted combatants. Sorry. I just couldn’t given the circumstances coming off such a wash-out in the opening round which significantly depleted the field. Anyway, huge props to @Dave for agreeing to jump in on short notice, I would have said Sharp too but he’s made it clear he isn’t showing either which fucking sucks. Jesus Christ. Does nobody have it in them to just write any more? It certainly seems that way. That hurts for real. Let’s not dwell on it too much though, this is effectively the QUARTER FINALS of our topical tournament, there’s still a short way to go but I’m confident we can do this shit with the names involved. EDIT: It looks like @Dave has also noshowed this round now too. Damn. You guys really want to make this difficult to see through to completion, huh? I kept the line limit short at 32 lines, figuring the standard 64 line verse may be too much for the text battle contingent but even that seems to have some struggling. Ouch.

Anyway, there’s little we can do about that now, and it means we’ve no further replacements available to play-in so on to the semi-finals it is. I might match up their verses purely for both to receive feedback this round perhaps... we’ll see how that goes. I’m not the greatest fan of it, in truth, but given the circumstances it seems like the most logical and only practical way of giving the writers SOMETHING for the efforts at least to try and keep them motivated. It’s a hard slog otherwise and huge props to @Adverse here for keeping it moving like a champ. He’s truly shown his colours this tourney in terms of his sportsmanship and offers to help out in addition to the magazine etc. Salute to him. I think we may have got off on the wrong foot previously but I’m a good dude deep down and I think he sees that beyond the trolling facade and bravado.

Round One Battle Reviews!

@Johnny 6-Feet vs @Blue Bayou - @UserName was unable to show vs Blue Bayou, but we managed to enlist the help of former GWL champion Johnny 6-Feet to write on short notice against our former NBL champion Blue Bayou. Two kings going to war... well, kind of. Blue Bayou posted a topical verse, all be it one not only not written to the topic provided. And not even written by himself. Lol. This was bitten from @Aero, which is as preposterous as it sounds, and somewhat unsurprisingly Johnny 6-Feet ended up clean sweeping the votes (we’re ignoring Inno’s vote here) to cruise past Blue Bayou emphatically in the opening round to force the draws biggest upset. Did Blue Bayou beat himself? Quite possibly. I think he could have easily wrote his own shit and made a contest of this but for whatever reason he chose not to and now he’s out. It’s a shame as Blue fan really write when he’s in the mind frame for it but he seems out of sorts of late. Congratulations, Johnny. Thank you once again for coming through.

@Bladed Thesis vs @Objective - Yo, this battle was actually good and really close, closer than I think a lot of people had it being on paper with many believing Bladed would make light work of the Norwegian here. Objective showed the fuck up for this one, condensing his lines to strengthen the implied rhythmic cadence to his verse, he mixed it up well with technical ability and rhyme scheme, coupling it with visual imagery and he made a real match of this, it wasn’t the cakewalk some imagined Bladed would have at all. In the end though Bladed did pull through though with his murderous body in the trunk plot beating out Objective’s romantic recanting in one of the closest contests of the round. Sure, it was also one of the few where both opponents actually turned up with something, but were not trying to discredit either of them like that. This was a close battle.

Diablo vs Razah - Diablo emphatically stomped Razah into the ground and made him his bitch. Just kidding. He did win though, and quite convincingly against solid opposition.

Adverse vs Inno - Adverse brought that HEAT, plenty of descriptive imagery - particularly in the first half of this one - as he displayed his top notch world building skill and layered it on thick. Someone commented that this read almost like Inno saw Adverse’s piece first and wrote the opposite. I thought so too actually on first read, though I’m not so sure how intentional it was, maybe more of a subconscious choice truth be told. Inno came through for us though so salute to him on that; definitely made a match of it and I really wish I had more time to cast a vote on this one but the weekend ended up running away from me so hopefully this will suffice somewhat - I read and enjoyed the battle from both sides, but Adverse had more I liked in more areas in terms of his word choice, his descriptive language and use of imagery throughout that powered him forward here and made him look like an early man to beat. On this form, to take out the reigning tourney champion winner in the first round, he’s laid down a massive marker already and this could well be his year to take the entire thing. He will be tough to beat for sure.

Hush vs Ullr - @Hush was no-showed by Hades and so Rap-Royalty’s own Baron X aka @Ullr stepped up on short notice to shut shit down. This was dope from Hush, he would have won over a lot of the other first round submissions but came unstuck against someone who might be an unfamiliar face around these parts, but is a very experienced writer at his home site of Rap-Royalty. He’s a former champion, and moderator, of their respective Gifted Scripts League with many years of experience behind him. It was good of him to show on short notice, and even more impressive to see him step up to the plate and win over an old hand like Hush’s. No easy feat for sure. The battle was close, splitting the voters, but in the end it was Ullr that pulled ahead toward the finish line and he advances to round two. Thank you again for showing gentleman, salute to both of you guys for real.


Resin M-I-C vs NYCSPITZ - Double no-show. Disappointing.


No-Show Shine!

@Zuchiefiasco steals the no-show shine slot this week with his verse against bigbaby. I’ve no idea why BB DA BB didn’t turn up with something, maybe Zuch’s early drop scared him off here, but he’s been active in the Open Mic forum dropping shit. Anyway, it’s a shame Zuch didn’t get to battle in the end because he had one of the better verses dropped this round in which he told a complete story with two distinct segments that intertwined nicely. He’s a new father, which may explain some of the content somewhat, but this is well worth the read from someone the topical side may not necessarily think of checking for off-rip as he’s predominantly on the text battle side of things here (and dope at it). If you haven’t peeped this already, please do so, and @Zuchiefiasco feel free to drop this verse in the Open Mic forum so you get more feedback on it. You deserve that at least. Glad to have you involved my man.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zuchiefiasco View Post


The Heroin Me

She said it’s too late, I told her it’s only a hiccup
She said the heroin is slowly killing her, i said she was dead the moment she picked up
It’s my fault and I know this, two bums in a cellar
It was easy for her to commit to a fraud when she does retail ones for the cheddar
As lame as it sounds, why would she stay by me now?
I’ll tell you why, she’s six months along, weighs ninety pounds
Can’t remember who got who hooked, blame that on the past
The last three years have been hella blurry, we can blame that on the Pabst
Fill the needle with pristine sour, stick her with that crippling powder
Euphoric daily, but a new vein collapses each sixteen hours
Can’t even find one nowadays, when she does it’s dumb nice
Pretty soon the doc will have to slit her wrists just to get her blood type
When I told her I wanted to stop best believe I meant it all
The only ticket outta this world is a lotto one, and it’s laced with Fentanyl


The Hero in Me


So here’s the plan..


Hit Walmart, find cash receipts and hope it sticks
Grab items off the shelf and return them, splurge on a Motel 6
Force her to the room, restrain her with malice and rage
I never owned a rock album in my life, but tonight I got Alice in chains
We’re two days in and she’s shitting at a pummeling pace
And don’t even talk to me about the vomit because it’s coming in waves
The detox is tough, but I know I can’t let her off yet
Because if she gets high one more time our unborn child is better off dead
She’s got stomach pains to the max, I know the tricks to save her
Too late for all that now, early morning Alice is going into labor
Long way from smoking crack, in Cali just snortin’
Punching her in the stomach on the reg and googling “back-alley abortions”
None of that matters now, this is the choice that was made
Natural birth is the only option, my touch is the ointment for pain
Legs spread on a low thread-count bum ass comforter
I’m not gonna let her do this alone, I’m the one that comforts her
Through the dope sickness comes euphoria as I’m filled with joy
We did it Alice, I’m so proud of you, by the way it’s a boy

Round Two Previews!

LMAO so this is ridiculously late of me, I’m well aware, but I figure it could still be fun to do so fuck it - is everyone ready? You best be. We’re doing this anyway as I had them half-wrote up prior to the further dropouts and whatnot involved which forced me to re-do some sections over. You guys are determined to give me an aneurysm this year it seems. Anyway, I’ve got the time. No problem. Let’s check this shitout:

Diablo vs Dave - with so many no-shows the previous round, we were left with a huge hole to fill. Dave rose to the challenge gallantly, agreeing to show up and show out, on time and with a verse capable of dwarfing all in his path. I of course took him at his word as a gentleman and threw him straight in against the British braggadocio champion Diablo, champion of many things and who almost always shows up for war. The sad thing is, his opponents often don’t. For all of Dave’s protests that he is the man for the job and will definitely, definitely, show up with a verse of superb undeniable quality - I predict he will crumble after reading what Diablo submits and realise this whole thing is very different to the text battle hijinks he is familiar with and he will emphatically disappear on us, just as his other text battle comrades had done the round before. This won’t be a contest. Diablo will emerge victorious in a unanimous landslide victory after forcing Dave into early retirement. There was only ever going to be one winner here. And there is. The name begins with D, but it’s Diablo. Better luck next time, faggot.

Zuch vs Bladed Thesis - I hope this one does do down, both have requested an extension for their battle. Zuch is on a hot streak at the moment but fresh off a no show victory last round, so how that affects him remains to be seen. Bladed on the other hand beat out Objective 2.0 last time out to secure the win over an adversary which is more than can be said for half the current field. Yikes. Let’s hope this one goes go down for all our sakes. Zuch has the more punchline-esque style which differs a lot from Bladed’s more technically proficient and rhyme scheme heavy steez. I’m a fan of both of their respective styles, all be them very different in terms of execution, but underneath all that both have a similar storytelling element that could make this surprisingly close all things considered. It might be a sleeper battle of the round as neither have high expectations of them going into this, no disrespect intended. EDIT: It looks like Bladed Thesis is no showing and Zuch has submitted a bare minimum jawn to claim the victory and little more. What a shame. I didn’t expect this to happen at all. Scratch everything I previously wrote about this pairing and simply insert “Zuch will win,”.


Adverse vs Sharp - So Sharp showed up completely at random last round posting in a battle like he was build for war. We rightfully granted him an opportunity to take part when one became available, just for him to announce he wouldn’t be taking part a day before verses were due. Sweet. I can’t be too harsh on Sharp here because he was somewhat thrown in at the deep end and I think Adverse might have conjured enough magic to beat him anyway, but Sharp can write. Make no mistake. This wouldn’t have been as one-sided as this may seem on paper. That said, I’m kind of gutted for Ad that he didn’t get an opponent as the options are so short with our field depleted after round one; but he fully deserves his props, he’s ever the professional here and keeps the same energy. I’m glad he enjoyed the topic and look forward to his upcoming verses as he seems to be really enjoying his writing again, which is what this is all about. He is a danger man. I think he has a very good chance of making the finals if not winning the entire tournament. He’s in form, involved and in his bag right now. It’s going to take a monster to stop him. EDIT: Zuch fucking posts a no-show verse and Bladed doesn’t turn up either. Yowzer. Thanks a bunch, guys. You let us down just when we need you most. What a fucking stupendous waste of effort to hype this up between you both just to get nothing, not even a Zuch verse to a topic he wouldn’t be able to use again, it’s just a complete shit show and we’re left to advance Zuch because he at least posted something with 16 words in it. Bladed couldn’t even be bothered to do that. Amazing turnout.

Ullr vs Johnny 6-Feet - This one has some controversy around it already, with Ullr not checking in in time (he probably didn’t realise he had to) and Johnny 6-Feet wanting to disqualify his opponent for posting late even though Ullr had contacted the moderator beforehand to advise he was showing, he just hadn’t noted the due by time being in GMT. All valid points, for sure, and maybe I could look at using a more standard American time next round (would that confuse even more of you?) but enough of that. I would always prefer a battle be able to go down in these circumstances rather than not, especially given the struggle to get from round one thorough to round two, losing another one of our active writers that wasn’t even aware of the due date as he filled in last minute last round. Just let the guy post and see the votes roll in, for the culture, COME ON! You may win. You never know. I know this is somewhat hypocritical of me but in a tournament I run, my decision is final, and my judgement on this battle is to let his post stand - he wasn’t even that late - and have it go to votes as it would have done anyway as standard. It’s a good battle and will make for a close one. I like you both, let’s keep it moving!

Power Rankings!

LMAO this may be the most unnecessary segment of a magazine ever written given the lack of people actually motivated to turn up week after week, yet here we are. The power rankings for the remaining contestants and why they deserve to be there.

Ullr - Ullr is actually from another text battle website/sprinting enthusiast forum which I won’t name here as their website doesn’t allow you to mention NC. It’s only fair we treat them with the same disdain, right? So for the benefit of this magazine, Ullr hails from LAP-LOYALTY.com where he’s been champion of their league and long-serving moderator. The 32 line format probably suits him better than most as it’s what they’re used to writing weekly over there. He’s taken out Hush in the opening round here on extremely short notice and that shows he’s motivated, with him home site being down at the moment he can focus on what he needs to do here to champ the entire thing and add NC to his list of accomplishments. He’s surely proven has the determination to do it. It’s a shame his foray into Netceedom has been so blighted by no-shows as reaffirm his believe not to bother posting here long term but alas, he seems to be enjoying the opportunity and you can’t fault his effort (well, not as much as his timekeeping).

Zuchiefiasco - Ah, Zuch was handling the transition to fatherhood so well, or so he thought. The baby was adjusted. They had got some sort of sleep pattern down where it meant Zuch could relive his former text prowess for a while. He felt revitalised on four hours sleep. We’ve all been there, the calm before the inevitable storm, then BAM! The sleep pattern shifts, the teething starts. you’re up at stupid AM watching kids cartoons on YouTube with the little one because sleep is an actual myth. You’re tired. You’re grumpy. You lose motivation. You were off to a flier too, but now the playing field has evened somewhat. Welcome to fatherhood. This is no longer text as you knew it but middle age makes it an exercise in futility. Sleep deprivation is a bitch. Your child owns you now. You either adapt for proficiency or you fall by the way side like so many ghosts of textcee past. I hope it’s the former. You’re good. Let’s see more of it. I thought you smashed it in the opening round and we’re very unlucky to not get an opponent, you’ve been killing it on the text battle side also. You would be a #1 seed right now if this was text battles and not topicals.

Adverse - Adverse is here after smoking our original Black August champion in the opening round, he got no-showed this round and putting up another pro performance that you should all definitely read and feed if you haven’t already. He puts in some serious work and that effort shouldn’t go unnoticed. Adverse isn’t here for nothing, he’s looking like the in-form favourite right now in my opinion and will prove difficult to beat for everyone. There are questions to be answered on how motivated he will be following a no-show this round, which is disappointing so late in the game, similar to what we saw happen with Zuch in round one actually here, but I’m hoping that doesn’t affect him too much and the prospect of a semi-final place should hopefully satiate him before we head into a salivating semi-final soirée. This could easily be Adverse’s year, we’ve seen many upsets occur already, but if anyone can beat the guy that beat the guy who beat anyone last Black August - it will surely be one of our final three other contenders.

Johnny 6-Feet - Johnny is fresh off a run in the GWL which saw him become an in-season champion with a respectable record before he agreed to show on short notice against NC’s Hush and pull off a closely contested win. I know he originally wanted Ullr’s verse disqualified due to being late but think he agrees the decision to let his verse stand was the best one for all involved. Johnny is a good guy, originally hailing from RapBattles.com before making the transition over to Netcees. Very few from RB fair all that well here, truth be told, but NC value skill no matter where they transpire from. He may be relatively new here to some, but Johnny has been a part of the scene for literally years and his writing shows he’s an experienced hand capable of mixing it up with the very best in their field. His battle in round two will be a tough contest, both of these guys are equally matched in terms of their storytelling capabilities and technical proficiency. I would perhaps lean more toward Ullr in terms of implied flow and rhythmic cadence, but more toward Johnny in terms of execution, imagery and wording. That isn’t so much a slight on Ullr as me bigging up both in their differing strengths, I think both showcase similarities stylistically but it’s their differences that I feel could ultimately decide this one amongst the readers in a true “styles make fights” adage scenario. This one will be Battle of the Round for certain. If not for any other reason that in being the only head to head to go down. Lol.



LMAO and WTF’s of the week!


LMAO @ how late this mag is. Jesus Christ.
WTF @ Johnny 6-Feet wanting Ullr disqualified?!
LMAO @ that being the sole battle of the round.
WTF must Ullr think is going on here? I can’t imagine he will be back.
LMAO @ Blue Bayou biting an Aero verse!
WTF @ NYCSpitz wanting back in after no-showing round one?!
LMAO @ This tourney confirming the transition from text to topicals is no easy feat
WTF @ How good these topics have been for you guys?!
LMAO @ bigbaby finding time to drop an OM verse, but not one for his opponent.
WTF @ us confirming BOTW before it’s even had a single vote happen?!
LMAO @ us being in the semi-finals next round already.
WTF @ a second wave of the pandemic being needed to revive text topical battles.

This week ran away from a lot of us it seems. Still, we move onward and upward, two rounds left of this ish and we will crown the Black August II Topical Tournament Champion!

Let’s make the semi’s a good one, guys!

Until next time...


Peace!
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Last edited by sral; 09-22-2020 at 01:05 PM.
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Old 09-22-2020, 04:25 PM   #2
Universe
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What am I, Bigfoot? lol. Cool mag guys. I miss this.

Still got my weekly GWL muscle memory acting up...
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Old 09-22-2020, 06:23 PM   #3
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I take back the DQ.

If you've got votes then cast them.

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Old 09-22-2020, 11:00 PM   #4
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Great mag as always, and don’t worry about my interest dwindling, I’m inspired to keep writing! Appreciate the effort as always Lars
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