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Old 09-07-2020, 11:12 PM   #1
Sharp
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Default 1. Zuch vs 4. UserName - ZUCH WINS


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Old 09-08-2020, 03:46 PM   #2
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Nobody fucking cares, Sharp
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Old 09-08-2020, 03:55 PM   #3
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Sharp shut the FUCK up
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Old 09-08-2020, 04:48 PM   #4
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Sharp really needs to learn when to shut the fuck up
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Old 09-08-2020, 08:49 PM   #5
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That’s a lot of mass, and those are some ruthless paws
Women gravitate towards you, everything does, that’s Newton’s Law
Christ you’re large, straight out the cattle sector
You’re hovering just above 500, and I’m not talking bout your battle record
I’m not gonna go easy on you, it’s a FACT I’m the flyest
I’m going straight for the neck, and thanks to those beads I might actually find it
You’re a big red planet, I don’t mean to disturb the plot
Elon said we’ll land on Mars in 10 years, and it looks like he finally reserved the spot
For you this is lose/lose, must be your first time on a booze cruise
First lime, first cranberry, probably first time touching anything in that food group
Looking like the brother of Sam Tarly, his cousin at most
That polo homemade, last time I checked Ralph doesn’t make cloaks
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Old 09-10-2020, 09:04 AM   #6
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Let’s start with the obvious, fat jokes aren’t amazing to write
Not when that nose has SNORTED more weight than I've gained in my life
That nose being big is no opinion, we can make it a fact
I mean, this guy pays extra for vaulted ceilings just to lay on his back
It’s ridiculous, and it can suck air from men in such fashion...
That one sneeze on an airplane, and every mask descends in the cabin
But Zuch’s crafty, this pandemic won’t stop him y’all
His Covid test is the dipstick from a Honda and a bag of cotton balls
Those sinuses gotta leave scientists stunned in amazement
One use of a Neti Pot and his nasal drip’s flooding the basement
And while that nose is HUGE... We’ve all clowned it previously
One walk across a bridge that size, and I’d drop 50 pounds immediately

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Old 09-10-2020, 05:42 PM   #7
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Dam this was fire


Thank you both


Every line was cookin



Zuch seemed effortless . Above 500 worked well. Booze cruise was just worded so smooth



User killed every line damn near . The weight line parried a lot . Vaulted ceiling was crazy .


Covid test was best line of the season


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Old 09-11-2020, 03:08 AM   #8
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That’s a lot of mass, and those are some ruthless paws
Women gravitate towards you, everything does, that’s Newton’s Law
Damn, fire flip on this
Christ you’re large, straight out the cattle sector
You’re hovering just above 500, and I’m not talking bout your battle record
Lol
I’m not gonna go easy on you, it’s a FACT I’m the flyest
I’m going straight for the neck, and thanks to those beads I might actually find it
Dope
You’re a big red planet, I don’t mean to disturb the plot
Elon said we’ll land on Mars in 10 years, and it looks like he finally reserved the spot
Cool
For you this is lose/lose, must be your first time on a booze cruise
First lime, first cranberry, probably first time touching anything in that food group
Nice
Looking like the brother of Sam Tarly, his cousin at most
That polo homemade, last time I checked Ralph doesn’t make cloaks
Ok


Let’s start with the obvious, fat jokes aren’t amazing to write
Not when that nose has SNORTED more weight than I've gained in my life
Nice
That nose being big is no opinion, we can make it a fact
I mean, this guy pays extra for vaulted ceilings just to lay on his back
Haha nice
It’s ridiculous, and it can suck air from men in such fashion...
That one sneeze on an airplane, and every mask descends in the cabin
Cool
But Zuch’s crafty, this pandemic won’t stop him y’all
His Covid test is the dipstick from a Honda and a bag of cotton balls
this is fire
Those sinuses gotta leave scientists stunned in amazement
One use of a Neti Pot and his nasal drip’s flooding the basement
Cool
And while that nose is HUGE... We’ve all clowned it previously
One walk across a bridge that size, and I’d drop 50 pounds immediately
Lol


Short and sweet from both and a great read. Both basically stuck to one topic which was expected. Both had some cool flips on kinda played concepts (bridge/gravitate) which I don’t mind if they’re done well..

I’ve got

Newton’s law
Beads
Food group

Vaulted ceilings
Covid test
Bridge

I did the old ratings out of 10 and it came out zuch 46 user 45

Beautiful words guys

Vote - zuch
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Old 09-11-2020, 06:58 AM   #9
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Newtons law
Find ur neck
Food group - possibly lotb
Ralph solid too

Vs

Nasal drip
Bridge

This was weight vs nose.. Honestly wasn’t feeling as much from user. Seemed a bit more far fetched in concepts and didn’t really go for the jugular. Last 2 were pretty damn good but the opener kinda insulting urself style in a jokey way I don’t really fuck with. and then masks descending on plane was kinda a forced joke to me. Idk... Zuch took this for me

Vote Zuch
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Old 09-14-2020, 01:52 AM   #10
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I’m not gonna go easy on you, it’s a FACT I’m the flyest
I’m going straight for the neck, and thanks to those beads I might actually find it

lollll. yes please.

You’re a big red planet, I don’t mean to disturb the plot
Elon said we’ll land on Mars in 10 years, and it looks like he finally reserved the spot

pretty good.

For you this is lose/lose, must be your first time on a booze cruise
First lime, first cranberry, probably first time touching anything in that food group

lmao.

Looking like the brother of Sam Tarly, his cousin at most
That polo homemade, last time I checked Ralph doesn’t make cloaks

lmao


overall this verse pretty much cracked me up from start to finish, my favorites were Newton's Laws and the Bead lines.



Let’s start with the obvious, fat jokes aren’t amazing to write
Not when that nose has SNORTED more weight than I've gained in my life

LOL.

That nose being big is no opinion, we can make it a fact
I mean, this guy pays extra for vaulted ceilings just to lay on his back

oh god. the visual.

It’s ridiculous, and it can suck air from men in such fashion...
That one sneeze on an airplane, and every mask descends in the cabin

this one is funny but kinda iffy.

But Zuch’s crafty, this pandemic won’t stop him y’all
His Covid test is the dipstick from a Honda and a bag of cotton balls

lol just like the vaulted ceilings. the visual of the exageration cracks me up.

Those sinuses gotta leave scientists stunned in amazement
One use of a Neti Pot and his nasal drip’s flooding the basement

same as above.

And while that nose is HUGE... We’ve all clowned it previously
One walk across a bridge that size, and I’d drop 50 pounds immediately

dead.


well, User, you came with some absolutely hilarious and creative lines. The vaulted ceilings, honda dipstick, and your opener and closer were really really well done IMO. The only one I didn't really like alot was the Airplane line.




I could see this going either way, and I'm not remotely exaggerating, Zuch lit it up with the funnies, and had some creative twists on the regular User fat lines. But to me, User hit it on the Nose, and also the combos of making fun of his weight and dissing Zuch did it for me.



vote/User
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Old 09-14-2020, 03:31 PM   #11
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This was close and I could break it down a lot more
But I’m not going to
I have Zuchie with one more quotable.
Basically I have his first three bars and almost the closer
Up against
Opener, Covid test and the closing(lotb)
So even in quotables and then one more almost from zuch
That has me leaning toward Zuch
I really want to vote for user too, because @Amen is a major major faggot
But still, I must

V/zuch
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Old 09-15-2020, 12:37 AM   #12
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Vote - Zuch (maybe) barely

My favorite line was;

'That nose being big is no opinion, we can make it a fact
I mean, this guy pays extra for vaulted ceilings just to lay on his back'

though.
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Old 09-15-2020, 10:01 AM   #13
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That’s a lot of mass, and those are some ruthless paws
Women gravitate towards you, everything does, that’s Newton’s Law
Christ you’re large, straight out the cattle sector
You’re hovering just above 500, and I’m not talking bout your battle record
For you this is lose/lose, must be your first time on a booze cruise
First lime, first cranberry, probably first time touching anything in that food group

Vs

Let’s start with the obvious, fat jokes aren’t amazing to write
Not when that nose has SNORTED more weight than I've gained in my life
But Zuch’s crafty, this pandemic won’t stop him y’all
His Covid test is the dipstick from a Honda and a bag of cotton balls
Those sinuses gotta leave scientists stunned in amazement
One use of a Neti Pot and his nasal drip’s flooding the basement

LMAO @ Hi Jamie


Fun read and pretty dope battle....tough call as I have it tied in standouts, and no one had a bad bar per se.... respect User for going hard at the nose angle, but Zuch has my two fave bars of the battle with Newton and the 500 battle avg lines, so he edges it for me

Good stuff fellas

I got Zuch by a hair
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Old 09-15-2020, 11:15 AM   #14
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That’s a lot of mass, and those are some ruthless paws
Women gravitate towards you, everything does, that’s Newton’s Law
lold

Christ you’re large, straight out the cattle sector
You’re hovering just above 500, and I’m not talking bout your battle record
decent

I’m not gonna go easy on you, it’s a FACT I’m the flyest
I’m going straight for the neck, and thanks to those beads I might actually find it
loll

You’re a big red planet, I don’t mean to disturb the plot
Elon said we’ll land on Mars in 10 years, and it looks like he finally reserved the spot
yeahish

For you this is lose/lose, must be your first time on a booze cruise
First lime, first cranberry, probably first time touching anything in that food group
okk

Looking like the brother of Sam Tarly, his cousin at most
That polo homemade, last time I checked Ralph doesn’t make cloaks
cool

vs.

Let’s start with the obvious, fat jokes aren’t amazing to write
Not when that nose has SNORTED more weight than I've gained in my life
lmao

That nose being big is no opinion, we can make it a fact
I mean, this guy pays extra for vaulted ceilings just to lay on his back
cool

It’s ridiculous, and it can suck air from men in such fashion...
That one sneeze on an airplane, and every mask descends in the cabin
rofl

But Zuch’s crafty, this pandemic won’t stop him y’all
His Covid test is the dipstick from a Honda and a bag of cotton balls
lol

Those sinuses gotta leave scientists stunned in amazement
One use of a Neti Pot and his nasal drip’s flooding the basement
lol

And while that nose is HUGE... We’ve all clowned it previously
One walk across a bridge that size, and I’d drop 50 pounds immediately
okish


nose vs fat lines battle here.. very tight and tough call so it's more like a preference.. but I'm going with username, when I read zuch verse i thought he won but username came pretty dope too
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Old 09-15-2020, 01:11 PM   #15
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zuch came good.. nothing crazy popped up just overall solid jabs with fat jokes..

user was a little less consistent but threw some hooks in their.. snorted was ok then vaulted ceilings was a funny visual.. cabin, covid and neti pot hitt.. closer was ehh ok

v user by a ginger hair
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Old 09-15-2020, 06:55 PM   #16
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Re read the battle and i still think Zuch edged it

Submitting my second vote for Zuch
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Old 09-15-2020, 07:06 PM   #17
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yo i got yall with a vote. i don't do this so feel honored.

zuch's beads line was fire to me. food group. another highlight. i thought it was all good tho i mean i dunno the closer was the weakest to me. im thinking im missing something but i dunno. sam tarly is the man. i don't know if he has a cousin ralph so i don't think thats it. i think its just the they don't make polo's that big so it must be a cloak or something. i kinda wanna kill myself for putting myself through voting on a text battle and trying to find some gay hidden meaning that probably isnt there and its just a ha your fat and its not a polo its a giant piece of fabric draped on you line. but word. solid verse tho..

users opener was solid. the plane cabin shit. solid closer too. whole verse wasn't bad.

ima be real i wasn't wowed by either tbh. it was fat jokes vs. nose jokes. i didn't hate any of the lines from either, both were pretty good throughout.

maybe no ones voting cuz its pretty close in my eyes i dunno. i don't want to do it cuz i feel like he's won too much here but i think ima go with zuch. the couple lines of his that stood out i enjoyed more than the couple lines from user. but did i tho? i also disliked his closer the most out of every line in the battle. hmm. maybe i'll vote user. zuch does have a big ass nose fr. but user does seem fairly fat.

vote- des
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Old 09-16-2020, 12:26 AM   #18
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Zuch had:
The opener
Battle record
Food group
Closer was kinda hitting

User:
Closer
Vaulted ceilings

Thought you guys kinda got one dimensional and turned this into a fat jokes vs nose jokes battle, in that case I thought Zuch had some more hits to me. This was a great match fitting for a semis

V/Zuch
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