09-11-2014, 05:44 PM | #1 |
obsessed
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: fucka idiyote
Posts: 5,716
Battle Record: Faggot-1
Accomplishments - can recite entirety of shrek 2
Champed - tangoed with spider man behind scenes in spider-man 2
- was candidate for gerber baby 3x
- smush parker like bb comment on instagram saying "u fucka suck idiyote"
- smush beer on head and didn't cry
- parallel parked in between 2 ferrari's in tonky truck once
- when saying pledge of allegiance i said "i don't" lmao deadass bb satan
- won tshirt from taco bell saying "taco cat" is the same backwards for filling out 500 surveys in a
- neighbor house caught on fire i call FIRE department and saved lives, was in newspaper
- set neighbor house on fire lmao
- fuck neighbor husband and wife
- first fish caught resembled david ortiz
- colin kaepernick
- related to genghis khan
- elected assistant to the vice president assistant to the president for regional chess club
- never lost game of hide and seek
Rep Power: 8599679 |
SYSTEMATIC
its bb da bb. I'm bb da bb lol!! :))
It's paragraphical nonsense, problematic at best. Rewrote a lucid science atlas with sabbatical text, and replaced the end with amusing plot synopsis. A liar at crest like, yeah i'll go through the cosmos "mutant cockroach attacks that left the Mayans extinct" A chariot ain't a chariot with the heads of giants ahead See my time isn't time, it's just a parallel linear quotient coinciding with lineal solstice, riding around in a carousel through the fairytale of theorems in motion See, dimensional physics is step you've never envisioned it's a leg up on ethical physics. time travel is a limited specialty imagine alien schemes, an assembly of spirits on lines A-to-B on a similar spectrum waving beamed retinal visions of entropy imagine a momma whale on a quantum scale where the ocean ends now dream; subatomic leap, of ergonomic scheme where we co-exist ah-ha!, i don't know what i said, but i said it with pride that describes 99% of the lives that ever existed, said in a rhyme don't mention the spread, i spent most of my time in hell with a pen can't say i'm the greatest; 'havent proved to yourself im the best" like what the fucks that mean, compare linen to velvet decorum "YOU HAVE TO WRITE A BOOK, HEMINGWAY WOULDVE NEVER SPENT TIME ON A FORUM" golden pistol and bullets, enamored quietly with the red that i bleed shot me down romantically. decided orange wasnt the color you dreamed this is macabre art, so much grit in my teeth, ive leveled the two dents & crease made the whistling tune that much clever to flute porcupine percussion, pinprick vinyl songs are culture made backbone to society. that's when his spinal column ruptured lines i oughta've mustered, for myself and the lives i ought'a touch sucker to sticking around. staring at the stickers of car trunks bumpers awestruck, cluster of dead-ends and living on edge offed myself to shel silversteins where the sidewalk ends my minds all vexed. aint complacent, just feel a volatile burning never would kill myself, mossberg growing moss, i call it my tropical arming
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precision defender Last edited by big baby; 09-12-2014 at 08:07 PM. Reason: wanted 2 be semi srs so re-edit 3rd time!! |
09-11-2014, 06:36 PM | #2 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 26,349
Battle Record: 0-1
Rep Power: 84181442 |
True true
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09-11-2014, 07:04 PM | #3 |
Kill.It.Nonstop
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 666
Battle Record: 3-3
Rep Power: 662198 |
Haha....rippin arms off jk juz a bb got me
Yessiiiiir |
09-11-2014, 08:00 PM | #4 | |
HALL OF FAME
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: portal 7 to the 9th exponent
Posts: 16,171
Battle Record: 3-5
Rep Power: 0 |
Crazy.
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Quote:
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09-12-2014, 06:03 PM | #5 |
consults Lloyd
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 4,075
Battle Record: 0-8
Champed -1-2 Punch League Roast
Rep Power: 39345601 |
lol dope
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09-12-2014, 08:05 PM | #6 |
obsessed
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: fucka idiyote
Posts: 5,716
Battle Record: Faggot-1
Accomplishments - can recite entirety of shrek 2
Champed - tangoed with spider man behind scenes in spider-man 2
- was candidate for gerber baby 3x
- smush parker like bb comment on instagram saying "u fucka suck idiyote"
- smush beer on head and didn't cry
- parallel parked in between 2 ferrari's in tonky truck once
- when saying pledge of allegiance i said "i don't" lmao deadass bb satan
- won tshirt from taco bell saying "taco cat" is the same backwards for filling out 500 surveys in a
- neighbor house caught on fire i call FIRE department and saved lives, was in newspaper
- set neighbor house on fire lmao
- fuck neighbor husband and wife
- first fish caught resembled david ortiz
- colin kaepernick
- related to genghis khan
- elected assistant to the vice president assistant to the president for regional chess club
- never lost game of hide and seek
Rep Power: 8599679 |
@Certain change title to SYSTEMATIC
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09-12-2014, 09:02 PM | #7 |
SOBER
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 13,052
Battle Record: 2-5
Champed - AOWL Season 2
Rep Power: 85899406 |
damn bruh
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If I ventured in the slipstream Between the viaducts of your dreams Where immobil steel rims crack And the ditch in the back road stop Could you find me? |
09-12-2014, 09:04 PM | #8 |
living
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 3,469
Battle Record: 33-18
Accomplishments - Hall of Fame
Champed - AOWL Season 1
- Art of Writing League
- AOWL Season 4
- Write Week V
- GWL Season 1
Rep Power: 77606676 |
hemingway line was like dexlabb and NYC combined into a single accusatory stab at motivation.
shel silverstein was fantastic. the author that is. not really the line.. the satire is strong with this one. waxing hard here bb. not your best but still its good to see you posting around these parts. thanks
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Zack Wicks for president |
09-12-2014, 09:07 PM | #9 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: on the couch
Posts: 842
Battle Record: 2-6
Rep Power: 0 |
damn dude, thats straight up talent.
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09-12-2014, 09:10 PM | #10 |
Senior Member
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 481
Battle Record: 2-2
Rep Power: 0 |
Greatness
Last edited by MKG; 09-12-2014 at 09:29 PM. |
09-12-2014, 09:16 PM | #11 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: on the couch
Posts: 842
Battle Record: 2-6
Rep Power: 0 |
Thats straight up talent, I said it twice.
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theMuzzl3 AKA Malibu's Most Wanted Last edited by theMuzzl3; 09-12-2014 at 09:29 PM. |
09-12-2014, 09:18 PM | #12 |
Senior Member
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 481
Battle Record: 2-2
Rep Power: 0 |
Bb this with was beautiful
Last edited by MKG; 09-12-2014 at 09:29 PM. |
09-13-2014, 06:33 PM | #13 |
DOHpe since 02'
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Surrounded by white ppl
Posts: 14,693
Battle Record: 43-24
Champed - Netcees Battle League
- 1-2 Punch Onslaught
- 1-2 Punch League
- Hot or Thot Roast
- Hot or Thot 2018
- Fight Night 11
- NPL Roast
Rep Power: 34230532 |
closer had me like
my nigga
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It’s like weed in Highschool- w/ the cans I’ll smoke you
Bitch I floss . I Got the chain out to see like Constantinople |
09-15-2014, 11:46 PM | #14 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: on the couch
Posts: 842
Battle Record: 2-6
Rep Power: 0 |
This was seriously some of the most beautiful shit I have read. Coming from me, that probably doesn't mean shit to you... but I think you've got "genius" written all over you.
My first impression of you was quite the opposite, but now I see... praise the Baby. I could read this shit over and over again... I wonder how much time you spent on it? @BIG FUCKA BABY
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theMuzzl3 AKA Malibu's Most Wanted Last edited by theMuzzl3; 09-16-2014 at 03:20 AM. |
09-16-2014, 06:25 PM | #15 |
obsessed
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: fucka idiyote
Posts: 5,716
Battle Record: Faggot-1
Accomplishments - can recite entirety of shrek 2
Champed - tangoed with spider man behind scenes in spider-man 2
- was candidate for gerber baby 3x
- smush parker like bb comment on instagram saying "u fucka suck idiyote"
- smush beer on head and didn't cry
- parallel parked in between 2 ferrari's in tonky truck once
- when saying pledge of allegiance i said "i don't" lmao deadass bb satan
- won tshirt from taco bell saying "taco cat" is the same backwards for filling out 500 surveys in a
- neighbor house caught on fire i call FIRE department and saved lives, was in newspaper
- set neighbor house on fire lmao
- fuck neighbor husband and wife
- first fish caught resembled david ortiz
- colin kaepernick
- related to genghis khan
- elected assistant to the vice president assistant to the president for regional chess club
- never lost game of hide and seek
Rep Power: 8599679 |
20 minutes give or take
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09-16-2014, 11:11 PM | #16 |
SYRACUSE
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 4,033
Battle Record: 31-37
Champed - Write Night II
- Alias Topical Tournament
Rep Power: 4743544 |
This is dope
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UNIFIED THEORY |
09-26-2014, 07:24 AM | #17 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: on the couch
Posts: 842
Battle Record: 2-6
Rep Power: 0 |
Da BB be non-stop trippin on salvia (see image).
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09-30-2014, 02:26 AM | #18 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 1,008
Battle Record: 23-10
Champed - Art of Writing League
- AOWL Season 5
Rep Power: 23856376 |
This was excellent and educational. I particularly enjoyed this lines
"See my time isn't time, it's just a parallel linear quotient coinciding with lineal solstice, riding around in a carousel through the fairytale of theorems in motion See, dimensional physics is step you've never envisioned it's a leg up on ethical physics. time travel is a limited specialty imagine alien schemes, an assembly of spirits on lines A-to-B on a similar spectrum waving beamed retinal visions of entropy" The essence of this lines are encompassed by a a type of warp speed imagery that is travelling in the mental axis of one's mind. Since one of the tags state a DBZ connotation I will therefore state that it also resembled the world of the death where the spirits are awaiting in line to be sentenced by King Yama. Their forms being amorphous and ethereal. On another note, you tend to jump around a lot with many comparative assertions. Formulaic wise this connotes ambiguity. But not so much of an ambiguity that one needs to put on their detective lens to solve the mystery. Considering the last few lines I would venture to say this was a rendition of a suicide note, but the writer never committed the atrocious act, and so it's more of a reflection/ journaling of the angst when such contemplation takes hold. A bit more straightforwardness would serve this piece well, as well as more interconnection of the thematic factors at play. Because although they point to a theme they do not fully depict the bigger picture. These nuances that I point to are in no way a nitpicking to try to exemplify a detriment, but rather simply notions that came forth as I read and analyzed the text. A coming together of all the role playing elements that are happening in the main stage of the writing will suffice to culminate a truly outstanding piece. A scrupulous focusing on the merging of it all will prevent the reader from iatrogenic metaphorical poisoning when ingesting the medicine imbued in the literary world you've crafted. Thank you. Last edited by UnbornBuddha; 09-30-2014 at 02:28 AM. |
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bb illiterate, big baby has two dads, big baby kamehameha, both his dad's breast feed him, mods pls close thread, nycspitz irrelevant |
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