Camp vs jilti (S&F) pt. Jilti wins

[Camp Bell]

due tuesday midnight eastern
16 lines
must check in

[jilti]

Here

[Camp Bell]

...yup.

http://netcees.co/showthread.php?t=88958
http://netcees.co/showthread.php?t=93256

[Camp Bell]

@jilti



my key styles?...D that's reached sheek and jada's block
i'm the complete wild beast, yeti favored to evade my plots?
if i chief loud trees, jilti gets a fade with what baby adrian got
heat the beef now, please, bring it flavored....Frank's the pot
i eat feasts out of plates of armor, save a spot, satans potluck
see i'll squeeze, deflating the glock, pray you dont get shot up
i think extinct when engaging my op, idi amin slaying uganda
peep my sneaks, i'm blazing the spot more flagrant than dada
ya cheap release came in a box, you gotta pay for this product
beat me? seek a gang of cops with the most heinous of conduct
elite teams of angered monks, training with bane when in gotham
seriously, i gave cobain the shotgun while literally playing nirvana
speeding in my favorite tonka, beeping at geeks in racing hondas
stay in ya lane, i'll harm ya with bleach to the face, taste my drama
hostile demon and godly even, monster scheming for filthy reasons
im not leaving til jilti bleeding and blanco bringing a mop to clean it

[jilti]

Camp take a hike, i've already scaled heights ur afraid to climb rain or shine
aint nice with wordplays & rhymes, while the first day i arrived was like make way for Christ
Jesus this lame can't buy love by mail order or bribe, he's a failure in life
no prayer to find a fairytale wife using every type of jewelry to Copper, i just lay the pipe
explains why girls have no water retention if i'm in their presence or anywhere near them
cuz when my name's uttered ladies underwear get wet stain puddles from the mere mention
gotta lear jet with fly female participants at the rear entrance cuz my pimp hand strong
lines get that long against the wall to Ride me, might need to put bright green wrist bands on
sit back and watch as a player flips dimes like loose change, Bruce Wayne
soon as i take out the Batgirls ask to twirl it around for a few plays like at a high school game
strength is legendary like i was created from every famous sketch bearing Stan Lee's signature
the whole Marvel Universe pictured in one individual depicting worlds as miniscule next to earth
thats some Galactus shit, expanding depths of angle widths to where parameters met
geometry with calculus mixed in algebra sets til compounds connect where an alchemists' ends
power of fists hittin like a hammer, accurate enough to split hairs on a miniature atom
and as impact occurs its the last gasp of air for passengers wearin gas masks in chairs fastened

[jilti]

http://netcees.co/showthread.php?goto=newpost&t=95294

[Sharp]

links @Camp Bell
1 more @jilti

[jilti]

http://netcees.co/showthread.php?goto=newpost&t=98077

[Seyance]

v/jilti - way better rhymes and packed more in less space. it was pretty much over after the first 2 lines of his verse. camp, you need more complex rhymes that match up and more of them and this will give what swag you have more ethos, as better setups mean the wordplays come off better. a lot of your stuff was off a syllable or two from the rest, when you try go more than 2 lines on the same scheme it needs to be on point.

Camp take a hike, i've already scaled heights ur afraid to climb rain or shine
aint nice with wordplays & rhymes, while the first day i arrived was like make way for Christ

ain't as nice would've worked better, but this won it imo.

[theMuzzl3]

over-all flow, structure, and content of Jiliti's was better.

This line made me LOL, though:

"geometry with calculus mixed in algebra sets til compounds connect where an alchemists' ends "

Fool, calculus is algebra + more, mixed with geometry and trigonometry. Should have read "algebra with geometry mixed in calculus sets til compounds connect where an alchemists' ends." -- and alchemy is an ancient form of chemistry... I don't think calculus was even around back then.

That aside, and no pun intended but correct English isn't a factor here; its how the lines flow together and the content within them.

/v jilti

[Seyance]

even rhymes nicer how muzz said it^

[Blanco Bishop]

I thought camp came out a little rushed. Didn't really elaborate on his ideas n concepts. Want bad but definately seem better from him.
Jil had a dope opening couplet n didn't lose much momentumexcept for maybe the last bar. Also had better imagery n dope metaphors that were clearly depicted.


So


V jil