06-13-2020, 10:36 AM | #1 |
Senior Member
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Brown skin girl
She look in the mirror and see beauty,
Makeup or no Makeup she still pretty. People amaze by her eyes, Her personality so amazing. She have you memorized, She not afraid to show dark. She proud of the color her skin, She don't let nobody judge her. She accept the way she is, She has a gorgeous smile. Bring joy to your heart, Something about her sex appleace. Everyone go crazy over style, Last edited by Dope girl; 06-13-2020 at 06:50 PM. |
06-14-2020, 10:00 AM | #2 |
DMS—Diddled My Stick
Join Date: May 2018
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I thought it was very well worded, great technique and whatnot, but I must say I disagree with the message of the poem.
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06-14-2020, 03:07 PM | #3 |
............
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People amaze by her eyes,
Her personality so amazing. She have you memorized, ^^Chea!... |
06-14-2020, 04:51 PM | #4 |
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Thanks guys
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06-14-2020, 05:31 PM | #5 |
Sell Her
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very very emotional piece i had someone passing a mirror as i read it out so i was like beautiful stencil of a person and then some dope work cutie
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curious más curioso y más curioso
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06-14-2020, 08:31 PM | #6 |
Banned
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This is riddled with spelling and grammar errors.
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06-15-2020, 07:13 PM | #7 | |
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this nicer than anything you ever dropped pharaoh...
except for the verse you named after one of mine it had a good title rest was dookie Quote:
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06-15-2020, 07:20 PM | #8 |
Banned
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06-16-2020, 07:42 PM | #9 |
Lime Life
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Something about her sex appleace.
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He listens to voices inside of his mind
Explicit and poisonous violent crime. |
06-16-2020, 08:21 PM | #10 | |
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Quote:
great contribution you spellcheckin dunce hoe ass nigga & its not a "blind compliment" - its called sarcasm, genius. Last edited by Pakistani Hand Cannon; 06-16-2020 at 08:23 PM. Reason: 4got to call this nigga a dunce |
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06-17-2020, 02:33 PM | #11 |
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Thanks everyone
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06-18-2020, 05:21 PM | #12 |
Storyteller
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Based on someone you know? It came off as a personal one. Nice, simple but heartfelt wording about a topic seldom touched upon. I felt you could've gone on longer with this but it was nice for what it was. If the subject is your crush you should show it to her. Nice work.
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06-20-2020, 04:05 AM | #13 |
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this was pretty good, I mean the thought and emotion behind it... it'd be way better if you took a little more time to write coherently though.
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I just figured out how to change this. |
06-20-2020, 08:39 AM | #14 |
Senior Member
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John just a poem from off the top
Thanks for the feedback fellas |
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