Week 4 - Objective vs Pancakebrah - P WINS

Mike Wrecka · 08-18-2013, 11:46 AM

fucking sick battle. botw for sure.

pancake- insane verse. you portrayed a person with autism quite well. its not easy to think like that which is what you have to do in order to create a character with dialogue in a story. that was done very well. the part though, that I was most impressed with, and im not sure if others have touched on this, is the intense detail you went into the courtroom scene. you told about eight lines or so on his lawyers suit. each line intensely descriptive, even down to the stitching. that was awesome. I was fully engaged and invested from start to finish.

objective- sick verse. the story line was good. the first paragraph was really good storytelling. but then you put a twist in it from his perspective. the truth was totally unexpected. to create a plot like that is like a murder mystery detective movie type of scenario. impressive. the flow and word usage was strong. the mechanics in yours may have been a hair above your opponents.

overall- fuck you both for making me decide a winner here. two great verses. I got pancake with votw edging out objective by a nut hair

vote - pancake

08-18-2013, 11:46 AM	#10
Mike Wrecka WOW Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 3,523 Battle Record: 29-25 Champed - Writing Challenge League I Rep Power: 82779335	fucking sick battle. botw for sure. pancake- insane verse. you portrayed a person with autism quite well. its not easy to think like that which is what you have to do in order to create a character with dialogue in a story. that was done very well. the part though, that I was most impressed with, and im not sure if others have touched on this, is the intense detail you went into the courtroom scene. you told about eight lines or so on his lawyers suit. each line intensely descriptive, even down to the stitching. that was awesome. I was fully engaged and invested from start to finish. objective- sick verse. the story line was good. the first paragraph was really good storytelling. but then you put a twist in it from his perspective. the truth was totally unexpected. to create a plot like that is like a murder mystery detective movie type of scenario. impressive. the flow and word usage was strong. the mechanics in yours may have been a hair above your opponents. overall- fuck you both for making me decide a winner here. two great verses. I got pancake with votw edging out objective by a nut hair vote - pancake __________________ A.bove T.he R.est