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Old 06-19-2020, 01:31 PM   #1
~RustyGunZ~
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Default SCX: Round Three Magazine

THE SUMMER CLASSIC

Introduction

What a round! 14/16 people showing is an AWESOME turnout!... FOR WEEK 4 OF THE NBL. I am SO livid with you people, this is the CLASSIC. One single no show this round and your houses are going on fire. And get it together with the votes. This mag is late because I had to keep monitoring battles stuck at 3-2 during the slow time of the week. What were you retards even doing? Anyone in this round doesn't vote they are OUT.

Now onto the meat of things...

Reviews by Aero the Apex

Aero vs Ajax - I won this battle like 9-5 or something. I saw his verse and immediately changed my sig to "Ajax Bodied me. Thank you Netcees for everything you've done." Really thought I'd lost that one but that's natural bc most people are self critical. Zelph voted first which was critical. Voted for me so I changed my sig to not admit defeat. Then Zuch voted for the only purpose of preventing a sweep. Then I got another vote and then Blue voted Ajax and it was tied and I was like wow this could go either way. Then I think I got the rest of the votes. Even got a vote from evaD which to me let me know I actually won. Ajax had some shit in his verse. Very unique style, the references are more intelligent than the average battle verse and that's very refreshing.


Ajax: This token’s whiter than me. Even punks are all laughin’…
His people are marching the streets. He’s in Wisconsin holed up in his Uncle Tom’s Cabin.

Best believe this African hack is in the red…
The last time he ‘took home anything from the markets’ he carried it back balanced in a basket on his head.

You’re a joke. You lack the energy and malice;
I’ll beat you over and over ’til you’re ‘looking at a worse slump’ than Jackie Kennedy in Dallas.
This troubled midget will just never be fly, son…
His life’s a rollercoaster — and theme park insurance companies wont let him ride one.
^^ These bars here won him the battle to me.
Looking at a worse slump than Jackie Kennedy was RIDICULOUS... then to follow up with the rollercoaster line... Honestly, reading that I knew what it felt like for Blue Bayou to lose to him in the UPN finals..


Ajax looks like Mark Zuckerberg so if he moved on it just wouldn't be right. Plus I'm more entertaining so it's better that I move on to give the fans what they want to see.


Neighbor vs Adverse


Going to be real. Read Adverse verse and after the first two bars I kinda just scanned the rest. Didn't really bother to read Neigh's verse either. Let me go back and check if either had fire.

The Messiah line from Ad was an almost. The rest was like standard whatever. Adverse is more of a topical guy if I remember correctly. So Neigh had Veritas then Adverse. WOW. Adverse you're still a good guy and keep writing bro.


Gotta be honest... Wanted to stop reading Neigh's verse after the first 3 words in the verse "Rap's Alanis Morrisette?" like who gives a damn.. So stupid... Ugh, okay let me read the rest...

Rap’s Alanis Morissette? You Oughta Know this faggot’ll get filled w/ hollows.
You’ve had ya Hand in my Pocket, so it’s Ironic this loss’ll be a “Jagged Little Pill” to swallow.
Didn't get any of that bc I'm not an emotional mid 30 year old female..

& I heard ya bf makes you bleach your ass before you twerk on his boner.
You’ve held so much Clorox between ya cheeks, Trump thought you had the cure for Corona.




Username vs Resin M-I-C


Dope dope battle. Battle of the round easily. Two titans going head to head. I didn't know User still had it in him tbh. Resin the GOAT when it's all said and done. Soak in that. Out of 200+ battlers over 20 years of of texting you're in the conversation as the best. User top 20. This battle was for the culture.

Whoa, I was just reading the battle and I'm seeing that Resin edited his verse or something? I take the GOAT comment back. This definitely tarnished his legacy along with that mediocre Knuck pic diss. Good grief Knuck flatlined Frac in their pic battle. I wont review that one but let's just say there was rude customer service at the hotel for a week. Yelp reviews not favorable.

I'ma put the standout lines from this battle. Resin acted real gay here.

This creep is a lame. Ya legacy is Aloe carryin ur ass, he cheated the game..
u rubbed elbows with the greats.. but u better not look my way findin ur seat on a plane.
oh User’s a good guy? calm ur tits.. it’s Netcees.. he aint armed a smidge..
bein a cool & collected head dont make a stink here, u better off in jeffrey dahmers fridge.
You die next. Combos for ur diet plan.. then see this guy rest..
cuz a punch’ll curb ur appetite.. swallowin ur own gums takes 7 years to digest.
Mahfucka.


User:

Pizzahut, Taco Bell, KFC, my arteries will likely be done
but statistically, I'd die quicker if I just asked you to drive me to one
after this bar I was like Uh Ohhhhhhhhhh
Nike put him through school, & onward this Slope would journey
Because his Full House folded more pairs for them than a poker tourney
after this I was like alright, keeep it up
Was with your girl in the shower, she slobbed the cock all day
and I had her slappin' the tiles harder than your last Mahjong game
Imagining User's fat ass banging ur girl and she moaning was more heartbreaking than anything..
You know u got tiny asian peen if overweight where's my dick peen is making ur girl moan in pleasure.

Lets take a moment, the countries rioting and liberals are keen to burn
there hasn’t been this much outcry over the left since your last illegal turn
after this bar I was like oh okay.. I was going to see how I could somehow vote Resin through but User got this


Enbombz vs Inf


Enbombz is the ONLY person here I KNOW would make me hesitate if he said let's throw hands so I'm not going to be too harsh here. Honestly I wasn't really looking forward to this battle so I gotta read it again.

Enbombz starts off with:

"Inf aka Thorne aka The Wounded Warrior aka Former one half of Cashtration."

Whenever I see this I know I'm about to be bored as paint with nameplays. Spare me... but let's see if I'm wrong

Chop you to pieces after, bitch it get real dark
Shits like a Bags vid...that fucked up head gone get split into 3 parts
nice

did I vote on this? cant remember.. anyways the rest was aight.. Enbombz is a solid battler but he could've come way harder.. Prob too busy getting pussy at 6'3 205 lbs all muscle.


If I'm being honest here idk that I liked anything in Inf's verse. I think I voted him bc it's better for the culture if he moves on and not Enbomz.. Inf has way more creativity. Yooooooo if I had to revote I MIGHT choose Enbombz bc Inf had NOTHING.. WTF...
Inf is super creative though and it's best if he moves on. Let's keep it moving




Cashius vs Destroyer




I think this battle went how we all expected it to. Cash wins but we get to say "dope battle Des" to keep his whiny ego in tact.

Cash:

You used to be good, Des! What happened?...You’re writing is shit, fairy
You just don’t have it in you anymore...like your wife when she miscarried
[B]Good grief. I read that and immediately asked how could someone be so heartless. Cash doesn't make emotional attachments with us so he can be cold and heartless when we least expect. Cash doesn't talk about himself like at all or give any personals. He's the white Karoake which is crazy bc we found out of his extreme racism through the Karoake battle. These two could be the same person with a split personality. How insane would that be?

The rest if his verse was cool but standard...


Des:

faces DLB last round and it’s “that one’s a coon...”
he hates them so much he won’t even listen to dark side of the moon
LOLOLOL

Rest of the verse was cool.. generics tho.



Fracture vs Letterman


Fract got BODIED by Bags aka Ghost1 in Discord. Got so disheveled he even left the Discord server and said he wouldn't post for the battle. I sent Frac a PM like "dont leave, we really want to see you battle" and he still no showed. Frac is one of the dopest ever and is considered one of the greatest text battle writers ever but Netcees seems to be bringing him down to earth. This was a 50/50 battle I'm not sure what Blue had in the predictions but Blue was prob dick riding per usual. Letterman is DOPE and has had some of the dopest punchlines. I face him next and if he comes with it it will be battle of the round.

Anyways Frac no showed

Frac after being bodied by Bags in Discord:





Hush vs Cred


Hush and Cred was really looking forward to this one. A bunch of creative gun bars mannnn this could've been special. Cred decided to disappoint his text brother and no show. Hush had a bar that really made me question my attractiveness

Everyone knows my flow is harder
One shot fuck up the top of ya head worst than @Aero barber
The guy @'ed me too. Just viscious for no reason.
Cred no shows you and the guy you want to go at is me.. DAMN... Good thing Cashius and Res will take care of Hush this week. What type of luck is that?
You gotta face two elite tier battlers in one week.
Good luck mama's little boy...






Zuch vs Orc



Came into this thinking cool little battle but Orc got this for sure. Zuch cool but it'll be tough for Orc to lose on a site where's been through countless battles, had numerous awards and is loved and revered.

Orc got shut out. Not one vote. Zilch, nada. 50'ed on his own site LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOO sheesh. He came out hard though

Orc:

Z deep with the hoes? NOT believable bro
Friends call you “The Wingman” because you’ve got that Beak for a nose
LOL
I could keep Ajax on the payroll. The guap is too loud
Closest you’ll get to a Retainer is a Dentist visit after I knock ya tooth out
ahhh, okay okay.. kinda corny but we'll pick it back up
Reaally I’m not tryna throw hands even if you are slender
If I showed up to your work I’d get served quickkk. You’re an excellent Bartender.
alright, I'm a bit concerned. But this is Orc, he can come with filler and KILL the rest of the verse
Picture Zuch winning with not a fan in sight...
Maaan. Even if that idea has Grown Legs they’d look like Allen Knights
LOLOL.. damn dope diss. I hope everyone has seen Allen Knight's pics he looks like he came out of a Genie Lamp (Neighbor) with those skinny legs haha... Man Orc good diss esp if we all seen da pic
+ I’ll visit the crib if you play hero quick!
On the Roof with the Arms out Pointing but this isn’t no Aero pic
oh ok bro, I mean its okay but like i dunno if everyone's in discord like that it's a specific time frame these pics are up.. bar is kinda meh too.. put my name in it make it good brah
I’m the big Boss. You’ll never get play
If Zuch calling the shots it’s “Tequila & Sambucha are on special today”
oooooooooooooooohhhhhk, like didnt u basically just do a corny bartender bar though??
User got zippd. Frac quit. Orc vs Zuch is not fair
We keep thinking a Tropical Storm. It turns out you’re all full of Hot Air
not bad.. hopefully Zuch doesn't drop soild and your status can save you let's see


Zuch:

My vision sucks bro, I’m bad with the numbers
But I look at your bars and can see 2020, one disaster after another
hmmm alright, cool simple diss kinda played 2020 concept. oh wait, look at the tie ins, the current events the wit.. this hits.. I like it hehehe
Your girl sucks me off low cost in a gifted way
blew me for a whole two quarters.. I missed half of the Pistons game
hmm alright, kinda predictable.. still not beating my mans Orc
12 years emulating Butler, It borders on sick
You’re pushing a knockoff style that can’t even be ordered from Wish
I don't get the reference but 12 years emulating Butler was hurtful.. You need more than this to beat Orc
Yeah I slang drinks, you should be runnin in fear
Because bartenders have set your bloodline back three hundred years
hmmmm damn okay.. sheesh.. he knew Orc would come with bartender jokes and he preempted it with a personal diss to his ancestors I cant be mad at that. Maybe the Irish would be further along if they hadn't drank so much. *Goes to read up on the history of the Irish and the wars for no reason* Gahhhhh dang this Muhfucca Spitting
You run tier 3 soccer? You can’t stop this either
Because with guys you play every position, but the ladies say you’re not a keeper
lol alright
He’s Irish and doesn’t pay the slightest attention
Alcohol gets an extra 500 each year for claiming this guy as dependent
it's meh to me, others might like it
unemployment cash sure, yet we’re done with the money
After this you’ll need another welfare check, but it won’t be government funding
Ya know what? I'm not going to vote on this right away. I need to see where the other voters are with this. Are we going to save Orc or kinda just admit what just happened. We knew Orc's looks were falling off but we didn't expect for this... BODIED on his homesite.

[/QUOTE]

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Top 10 Punches


10

Resin M-I-C vs UserName

You die next. Combos for ur diet plan.. then see this guy rest..
cuz a punch’ll curb ur appetite.. swallowin ur own gums takes 7 years to digest.

9

Destroyer vs Cashius

Look. u ain’t shit faggot. So here’s another reminder
when we ask the champ if he got Cash App we wont be talking bout Grindr

8

Orc vs Zuch

Picture Zuch winning with not a fan in sight...
Maaan. Even if that idea has Grown Legs they’d look like Allen Knights

7

Ajax vs Aero

This troubled midget will just never be fly, son…
His life’s a rollercoaster — and theme park insurance companies wont let him ride one..

6

INF vs Enbombz

That half-black daughter's not yours we don't know who the pop is
Not ONE matching feature....She only takes after you cuz she shadows ya shoplifts

5

Neighbor vs Adverse

& I heard ya bf makes you bleach your ass before you twerk on his boner.
You’ve held so much Clorox between ya cheeks, Trump thought you had the cure for Corona.

4

Zuch vs Orc

Your girl sucks me off low cost in a gifted way
blew me for a whole two quarters.. I missed half of the Pistons game

3

Aero vs Ajax

Saw footage of us eating lobster, he went into a blinding rage
Had to cut the film to vent, then took his TV Dinner out the microwave

2

UserName vs Resin M-I-C

Pizzahut, Taco Bell, KFC, my arteries will likely be done
but statistically, I'd die quicker if I just asked you to drive me to one.

1

Cashius vs Destroyer

You used to be good, Des! What happened?...You’re writing is shit, fairy
You just don’t have it in you anymore...like your wife when she miscarried


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Predictions by Bagsworth Bentley

Hush vs Cashius

Idk who keeps giving Cashius minorities to battle but enough is enough. Our country is in a state of crisis, and I for one will not sit idly by while Cashius continues his attack on the anti-racist community of nc. Nah but fr Cash racist. Hush apparently is married and has a baby on the way/? maybe the baby is here? God bless. You know what to do Cash. Uhmmm this battle will be a classic though if both show up to battle. Hush recent style is punch line heavy and creative with a laid back approach. Cashius wording can be charming but longwinded at times. Cash definitely will come with a more technical approach, but Hush will have the bangers. I'll take hush in this one, but I dont think Cash winning would be a long shot.

Aero vs Letterman

look. Aero literally competes in krumping battles wearing over sized Karl Kani sweatshirts. He looks like mr peanut got lost in compton and then swiftly rerouted to nebraska. what kinda battle is even going on here? letterman fuckin trash and aero legit be writing his verses while his girl pegs him as he drinks peach schnapps. Letterman will really need to watch out for aeros tendency to write highly questionable bars that bring his own sexual identity into question. Idk the crazy thing is I could never tell u a letterman bar........does anyone know any>? but to be fair the only bar I really remember from aero was about him sneaking into somebody girl house and glistening her cat with a wand dildo. Ill go with aero here, but I dont want to be confused here when I say he is out of place this far in the tourney.

Neighbor vs Username

neighbor punches his girl and smokes cigars. User is a fat guy from lamas archives that we all assumed died in 09. Not really sure about users current condition but he assured me that he was still fat in the discord. neighbor appears to be as abusive as ever and we also have not seen any recent pics of his girl, so I can only assume she is burried under the porch with all of his old jedi mindtrick albums. user name pretty funny guy but neighbor verses literally have the matrix artillery on stand by. I PALM THE KLITCHNEKOV WITH CHERRY OAK TRIM ON A TRIPOD......USER? LOOK AT THIS GUYS BOD. gonna side with user on this one after more serious deliberation. this should be fire tho. I prefer neighbors style, but i think were seeing a distancing from the gunbar era and trending more towards the humorous on nc during this tourney sadly.

Inf vs Zuch

lol inf is an actual fucking psychopath. somehow I was sent his entire notepad of concepts for upcoming battles and my god. someone should have a word with his family or close friends. Inf did steroids back in 2015 and couldnt bench or deadlift more than me when I was just eating poptarts. its under serious consideration as to whether we have actually seen a genuine pic of inf which I think is incredibly strange considering the pics he did post. some short little dwarf man who looks like he drinks black velvet and cooks percocet on a spoon in between shingle tear downs. everyone seems to like zuch. not really sure why. voters of nc betrayed our beloved orc and have adopted this strange stupid little fagot man as our new champion NOT ON MY FUCKING WATCH. if u retards let answer win 2019 and zuch....ZUCH...wins 2020 sc im literally going to burn this site to the ground. fucking dropkick zuchs new baby into a volcano i dont give a fuck.

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Outro
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Old 06-19-2020, 01:51 PM   #2
Aero
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The top 10 punches were on point. I thik Zuch's 2020 line could've replaced the Pistons but other than that its good.

Aero literally competes in krumping battles wearing over sized Karl Kani sweatshirts. He looks like mr peanut got lost in compton and then swiftly rerouted to nebraska.
LMAOOOOOO
Ill go with aero here, but I dont want to be confused here when I say he is out of place this far in the tourney.
You couldn't be more wrong

voters of nc betrayed our beloved orc and have adopted this strange stupid little fagot man as our new champion NOT ON MY FUCKING WATCH. if u retards let answer win 2019 and zuch....ZUCH...wins 2020 sc im literally going to burn this site to the ground. fucking dropkick zuchs new baby into a volcano i dont give a fuck.
LOL.. good grief...




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Old 06-19-2020, 02:18 PM   #3
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Lmaooo wowwww aeros hypocracy is at an all time high for this one

Fun read tho props to all the chipped in. Should be some good battles this round

Also lmao at Bags. Answer would body the fuck out of you with minimal effort if we're being honest
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Old 06-19-2020, 02:20 PM   #4
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Lmaooo wowwww aeros hypocracy is at an all time high for this one

Fun read tho props to all the chipped in. Should be some good battles this round

Also lmao at Bags. Answer would body the fuck out of you with minimal effort if we're being honest

lol explain the hypocrisy
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Old 06-19-2020, 02:30 PM   #5
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Honestly, reading that I knew what it felt like for Blue Bayou to lose to him in the UPN finals

You already stated you wouldve voted for me or Frac in that battle. So to twist it like this noww is hypocritical, and lame. Weak angle from a weak man.

This was a 50/50 battle I'm not sure what Blue had in the predictions but Blue was prob dick riding per usual.

Wtf is this shit? I didn't even do predictions for this battle you fucking little electric circus wannabe raver


You continue to throw jabs at me for no reason when all I've ever done is swept you or bullied you into no showing me EVERYTIME

I won't have this. I refuse to have this...I will ERUPT
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Old 06-19-2020, 02:32 PM   #6
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LMAOOOOOOOOOOOO
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Old 06-19-2020, 04:50 PM   #7
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Fun read lol I laughed
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Old 06-19-2020, 06:00 PM   #8
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Aero you’re in big trouble
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Old 06-19-2020, 06:43 PM   #9
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Aero you’re in big trouble
LOL
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Old 06-19-2020, 07:44 PM   #10
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I’m facing INF but I’m releasing the “Aero verse” instead.
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The sight’s laser. Lift the beam from the hip like a lightsaber/
Or pull up to ya doorstep...I’m on ya porch wavin like polite neighbors/
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Old 06-19-2020, 11:18 PM   #11
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Need to see more replies and feedback in this.

Also a hint of gratefulness goes a long way.
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Old 06-19-2020, 11:38 PM   #12
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STFU pussy
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Old 06-20-2020, 07:52 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zuchiefiasco View Post
I’m facing INF but I’m releasing the “Aero verse” instead.
Both are Asian so that’s completely fine
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Old 06-20-2020, 09:26 AM   #14
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They are also both retarded.
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Old 06-20-2020, 12:38 PM   #15
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Witty chill man that crossed the line
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