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Old 07-31-2015, 11:58 PM   #1
Sharp
HE / HIM / FRAC
 
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: PA
Posts: 11,592
Battle Record: 56-21

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Default Playoffs Opening Mag

[Introduction]

Sup all, Sharp n AK featuring Knucklehead with the first playoff mag. We decided to go for an opening and closing mag rather than one each round, because as it goes on there's gonna be less shit happening to write about. Though we very well may have some extra shit in between... for now though we gonna start toning down while gearing up for the upcoming 1-2 Punch Season, get psyched for that because it's going to be fucking bananas. Anyway let's hit it.




[The Contenders]


1. King Karaoke 7-0
[Sharp]
Honestly, Kar has been the best battler in my modding tenure on NC which is why I'm espeically disappointed he's going. The most consistent battler in high pressure situations – dude has lost 1 champ match and he's been in nearly HALF of all of the past 2 season's champ matches. He's literally signed out of the champ spot more than he's lost it. And anyone thinking 'yeah I could've done that' almost certainly lost to Kar somewhere along the way. He was the number 1 seed for having the same win differential as Sn00p but at the same time being undefeated and winning more champ matches. Hopefully he'll get back at some point but this is one of those rare few times where a dude says he's splitting and there's really nothing he could've differently. If he does choose to compete, he'd have tough competition but at the same time he's shown his ability to beat anyone and I'd say is the most likely to champ in a stacked field.

[Allen]
At the top spot that everyone fights for is Karaoke, dude had another amazing season, he dropped fire week in & week out...one the best to do this in the new era tbh..he beat alot of top names this season, one the best battles was w/ sn00p & ill nika guys that take effort to beat. His style of personals an disc bars are top notch & grimy.
He had some of the best lines i read this season. I think over the last 3 seasons dude is like 24-3 or some crazy shit like that, which is very impressive cuz hes facing top tier compo not no wack niggas..He is the guy to beat an is def the top contender to win it all here. Hes a bet u couldnt go wrong on picking to win but this the playoffs anything can happen. Congrats at being number one bro & goodluck in the playoffs.


2. Sn00p 8-1
[Sharp]
This dude's addition to top tier just happened to coincide with NC1 going down, but regardless he is dope and not to be slept on. He's shown he can handle the best when he's on and his only loss was to Karaoke in a champ match, which is nothing to be ashamed of. He's gotten past the only thing holding him back (awkward wording with flips) and is a creative force. Anyone up against Sn00p should expect the best or they're likely to get surpassed pretty easily.

[Allen]
At the 2 spot is a dude that was on fire for a while to this season. He went to def the title 5 weeks straight till he meet kar in a real close, some say debatable title match. Whats even crazier is that english is his second language an hes beatin on all the american cats. Dude has a real creative style w/ slick wording an nice personals. He came along way from nc1 to being in this spot now, another new era cat thats dope.
He's def one that can take the season title an claim it, he has the skill to do it. He has surprised all season. Props for makin the number 2 spot.


3. Tic 8-4
[Sharp]
The final regular season champ – ignoring the specifics of each battle, Tic is a solid battler to say the least. He showed up during my first season of modding and has been a lot of fun to watch. He's gone from OK new guy to a realization of that potential. If he's actually showing with effort now he's a clever cat, and is usually good for one or two bangers in a battle if he's motivated. Another guy not to sleep on, his high seeding was based on his number of wins and the fact he champed. The question is can he live up to the expectations of a champ? Genuinely looking forward to finding that out.

[Allen]
At the number 3 spot is tic tac, has had a real up & down season at the start when he signed in but finished off strong & brought him to this high spot, pretty impressive & shows never give up during the season, some times streaks just happen outta no where & u drop fire, which he did. Dude has some cool creative stuff i like his style he mixes his verse well w/ personals an wordplay an generics. He deserves this spot tbh. He fought his way here. So props on that bro, goodluck in the playoffs.


4. Junto 7-2
[Sharp]
The mystery texcee. Jun da Goon aka 'no more June flips PLEASE'. Not much is known about the dude beyond his verses and they are tight. Probably the most low key of all top tier heads. Yeah, I called him top tier. Heard it here first from none other than Sharp Nine. His wording is mean and he can go toe to toe with pretty much anyone. I expect him to make waves in order to make up for not champing.

[Allen]
At the 4 is Junto a real dope head that came outta no where killin shit. Dude has an old school feel but mixed it w/ shit that can run w/ the new era not many ppl can do that but he did. Had a dope battle for the title w/ kar in a close one. He had a real good season, beat some quality compo. He can beat anyone of the top heads tbh. He won all over the site, he champed the key grand prix 3 which had some tough compo in there. I think if he focus's he could win it all here, he had one of my personal fav lines of the season that elephant trunk bar was fire. He worked to get to this spot & deserves it. Props on gettin the 4 bruh, lets see u do work in the playoffs, g/l.


5. (R) Orc 4-3
[Sharp]
The only guy to champ a season in this postseason, Orc's deadly when he shows up. He makes some of text's cleanest wording look effortless and would've had a much better record if he didn't have a string of half baked showings early on. Not much I can say about him that most people don't already know. If he shows up, you best bring your A-game and if you ain't battling him enjoy dude's verses.

[Allen]
At the 5th spot is a HOF Orc, dude is dope & has one of the best wording in the game right now. He had a rough start this season, w/ acouple of loses but turned it right around an dropped flames on muthafuckas, dude beat everyone before & can beat all these on the list. He would be ranked higher if he battled more & didnt have the N/s loss on his rec. He can do pics an is dope at them. Orc is a real threat to win & i would put my money on him cuz i feel hes hungry an wants to prove he is the best an champ the season. Props on the 5th spot & drop ur hof shit bruh, show these lil niggas watsgood.


6. murda sho 6-3
[Sharp]
This dudes verses are probably the closest thing we got to that URL style shit that made us interested in battles without being complete shit like they got on those BVA sites. When Sho is on he does pretty much everything right, shits creative but still has the sting of a live battle. In my opinion that's why the dude is so effective, and done well he could top anyone.

[Allen]
A tru vet that did work this season, had some crazy lines too, that 380 pop star & bizzy bone lines were crazy. His gun bar style been really popular lately but he does it the best. He has been in forum this yr winnning other shit on the site like shadow boxing. Dude can hang w/ the best & beat the best before. I think hes really improved in his creativity an being showing it. He could be the sleeper winner of this shit, who knows.
I see him being hungry & wanting to stomp out whoever comes in his way. Props on makin the 6 spot, goodluck in the playoffs mayne, show them gun bars.


7. Destroyer 7-4
[Sharp]
NC silver fox right here. Des is interesting battler. He's got the ability to flip things creatively though his ammo selection often holds him back – his tendency is to go for concepts that have been done. But this makes him a dangerous pic battler because when the ammo is laid out for him he can do more with it than most guys I've seen. His hit-or-miss record in regular battles can hold him back but there's no denying he can bring it. I'm expecting him to drop some of his best in the tourney setting and the way he finished the season I know he can bring fire to the playoffs.

[Allen]
At the 7 is des, hes really peaking lately, won a FN but also been droppin some good verse w/ some cool lines, i think he finally realizes he needs to stay away from that played shit. He is one of the best pic battlers on the site. All season he has been scarping it out & fighting for a spot in the playoffs, had a close battle for the title almost won it. He could be the dark horse of this playoffs an surprise everyone an win it all. Props on stayin in an not bitchin about votes, u really stepped ur shit up bruh. Do work in these playoffs.


8. fraze 7-5
[Sharp]
The biggest surprise this season, fraze has gone from a sign-in because there was nothing else going on here to a legitmate threat. He's creative and quite frankly smart. There have been times when the biggest thing holding him back have been his bars going over the voters heads. With the cream of the crop involved here I expect voting to work out better for him and I expect him to surprise here, because quite frankly dudes don't know him too well yet – it comes with the territory but considering the other guys I point out as dope before anyone else fraze is looking good going into the playoffs in the top 8.

[Allen]
At the 8 spot is another ol school nc1 head but known mostly for topical, but he did work in the battle scene this season. He had some dope verses & beat some nice heads to. The first weeks he was winning alot by no shows w/ stellar verses but as soon as we called him out in the mag on it, dude stepped up his shit quick & proved me wrong an drops some fire, which made me happy. I like when im proved wrong. This guy has the skill an creativity to come outta no where an win the season title everyone gunnin for. He is not a person to take lightly or sleep on. Props on gettin the 7, goodluck in the playoffs.


9. Lotto Smirk 6-4
[Sharp]
Man Lotto is like Greed with just a bit better wording at times – the concepts are there consistently but there are times when his execution just disappoints. I trust him to work his shit out with the longer due dates, which can make him a threat. If he doesn't he knows the competition here will tear him up. With a little more thought on delivery he can go pretty far here and I'm really excited to see the fraze/Lotto rematch round one.

[Allen]
At the 9 spot is lotto, a dude that came back from being mia for a long time, but he came back an got back in forum an got his shit back down an got his wording on handle. That shit is dope cuz he worked for it hard. He has some nice concepts & now his wording is down hes a threat in the playoffs no doubt. He had some nice battles this season always has a dope ass bar in each verse. I think if he trys his hardest & focus's this could be a problem for anyone in these playoffs. He def shows he wants to win and willin to put the work in. So props on the 8th spot dawg an drop ur dopest.


10. ispaz 5-3
[Sharp]
One of my favorite new guys who I was calling to be dope before he was good enough to hang with Tic. He always had the wording he would need to do some damage but when concepts started clicking Spaz became a threat. I really don't know what to expect from him, but I know if he doesn't bring it he can't hang here. That said I figure he'll wanna cap of his first NBL season with a good playoff showing so all I can say is he's one to watch.

[Allen]
At the 9 spot is ispaz a dude at the start of his season i had real high hopes but didnt show up w/ the bars i seen him drop, which dissappointed me but he turned it all around an has been dropping quality verses towards the end & thats dope. He finally proved why i said he had bars, hes been doin work now got into his stride an is pretty creative. I think hes gettin better an better every battle an will continue that thru these playoffs. Dont sleep on this kid, props on gettin the 9th spot homie.


11. ill nik-A 4-3
[Sharp]
The legend and HOFer who should have a better record, but he signs out for 2 weeks every time he loses. The dude is gonna champ something at some point so why not make it NBL? He's had good showings so far but tight competition. He's right up there with Junto for being among the best without a champ (Karaoke is fucking ruthless). But this old cat still likes letting the new heads know whats up before they get to cocky and that's an invaluable thing to have – invalue the shit out of these guys nik.

[Allen]
At the 11 spot is nika a dope HOF member dont let the rec fool u he can beat & has beat everyone. He had some of the best battles this season, the kar title match is one of my fav's he has fire there. He really been dope thru mad era's that crazy he's one of the only ol school vets that prove they can hang w/ anyone in any era, hes consistent as fuck. I can see him winning is easy cuz whens hes motivated hes dope as fuck an really creative, he's not HOF for no reason. Props on the 10 seed & work these youngin's w/ them bars.


12. (R) Bust 3-4
[Sharp]

Dude has been among the most hit-or-miss battlers this season. When he's on, he's definitely on which I can respect. He's had some tough competition this season but he's still hung around, tbh he's been under even my radar and that says a lot. Looking forward to seeing what he does in reserve and other battles.

13. Cred 6-5 (1 DQ)
[Sharp]
Cred's interesting, I like his style done well, but when he's off it's like a less creative murda sho with more misspellings. My only gripe with him is that he has wording but creativity gets away from him at times. Again, probably more of an effort thing but he's definitely in it for the playoffs – assuming this keeps him at his best he can do some major damage here.

[Allen]
At the 13 spot is cred, he was real solid this season, has a gun bar style like murda but there totally different in the ways they do them, which is dope. He can drop fire, & i seen it. You can tell he wants to win this an show off his skill, dude is hungry & thats gonna be a big factor cuz it helps motivation, he has all that. I think he can be a sleeper to go deep in these playoffs if he drops fire like he can. Props on the spot cuz
drop that fuego.


14. Unfukwitable 5-3 (2 NS)
[Sharp]
Another guy who showed up in Tic's class and came up like a beast. One of the few guys I've seen who have a strength with generic bars, Un is just clever when he puts the thought in. After this past season which has been something of a breakout season for him (only voted to a loss once) I gotta hope he wants to merk in the playoffs and does what I've been saying he would for damn near a year now.

[Allen]
At the 14 spot is Unfuckwitable, prolly the most creative person in the playoffs. This dude thinks out of the box & thats a huge factor in txt battling. This season the battles he showed for he was on point an had some good bars, only thing is he needs to show up. I seen some crazy bars from him, had some sick shit vs me in a FN about folding the corner of a page some ill ass bar cant remember it word for word but it was sick. If this dude drops those kinda fresh bars, it could be a wrap for everyone, i hope he does i always like to see the underdog win. So props on making it to the 14 spot son.


15. Odd Ways 3-1
[Sharp]
This is King from RB I believe. Dude has been nice for the last few weeks, though he hasn't had much competition (at least not compared to what he has here). He's basically done all the right shit to strike a chord with text battlers – gunplay, wrestling bars, a flip no one's seen before – and he looks like a promising competition for whoever he's up against. I think him v Sn00p has mad potential and wanna see what Odd can do here.

EDIT: Apparently Odd is not King. My bad. Not sure where I heard that.

[Allen]
At the 15 spot is Odd Ways, dude is pretty nice gotta a good mixed style. Has sports bars which i like alot cuz yah'll kno loll but hes got good wording its harsh thats a big factor in battling. I seen some good bars this season from him that impressed me. I think if he turns it up this playoffs he could do work. He's one of the new era dudes an hasnt disappointed yet. He could win this outta no where, thats wat dope about the playoffs anything can happen dudes get in a stride & win it all. Props on makin the 15 spot homie, drop them bars.


16. Chyeahhh!!! 4-4
[Sharp]
Probably among the most hated on battlers for his persona. Between the conspiracy shit and the fact he just keys everything people can pass judgement on dude pretty easy, but he always shows and can absolutely be clever. His biggest strength is definitely his ability to write under the gun – look at the 16 line verse he wrote for Karaoke in fucking 3 MINUTES. Getting me to write 12 in a week is pulling teeth at this point. Honestly, even though I think if he had some more effort in his verses he'd be doing a lot better I think that'd take away from his style a bit, so all I'm gonna say is I fuck with the dude's verses and shine on, you tin foil diamond.

[Allen]
At the 16 is Chyeah, he had a up & down season but towards the end it looked like hes gettin in his own stride & that could be trouble for others cuz ppl be sleepin on him. I think if he sticks to straight foward shit w/ a creative twist he can do damage, he had some bright spots in his verses this season. He can upset some ppl here. Props on grabbin the 16 spot & drop some fire bruh.


RESERVES:
[Sharp]

Remy Lebeau 2-1
This guy. Been looking good lately, clearly has a text past I don't know about but he can hang. From what I've seen there's something of a lulz factor which can be hugely hit-or-miss and he's been doing alright. Really just another cat I just wanna see proving himself on the bigger stage.

Swerve 2-1
IMO one of the most slept on battlers period. Swerve has his own style that I've been talking up since I had the platform to do it. Not entirely sure why this is a Sharp thing but I'm sticking to it – he has a style that works in it's own way. Wording that talks down to the opponents and when he's on it's a fun read. He looked like he's been shaking off rust the last few weeks, so I expect better from him then we've been seeing.

IAmRhetoric 2-4
Some of that new blood that's always welcome in the league. Rhet's been coming along and it's been cool to watch. He's got a style and wording that tells me he knows hip hop and battles but is making the adjustments for text – without the vocal delivery you have to make up for that and he's starting to. The more he battles now, the better, and while this probably isn't his offseason it can't hurt.

Greed 2-5 (1 NS)
Greed... man... the ultimate casualty in the war of Concepts vs Wording. Always has good ideas but execution can just be awful when he doesn't bring it. If he's up against dudes he knows he's usually a little better, so we gotta see with that, but personally I'm just glad dude's back to battling – I've been calling him a good read since last season and despite the record I think he's lived up to it this season.

Witty 1-2 (2 NS)
Wit is one of the best writers around, bar none. Srs. His keystyles are standalone good text verses so if he's trying he's more than likely going to be a threat. This is one of the few guys I've seen go for humor effect and actually get it consistently, dude's a personality in writing and that can go a long way.

GAmen aka Bags 1-2
To be clear, Bags will not be writing verses as Amen talking about his love of dick, but the reason Bags is eligible is that he battled for those weeks. Bags has had some funny as shit personal verses but he's spent a lot of time without actually writing. Rust will probably factor into this to some extent but there's no denying he can write. I'm looking to see some lulz from him and depending on how far he goes he could bring heat.

Yppih 0-1
Not much to say about Hippy from the one verse I seen him drop. Looks like an old school head and that means it's either cool and concise or done to death. Hopefully we get more of the first kind.

Mr. J 0-3
~12~ is a funny and slept on writer. He had tough competition but he's still a creative force and I wanna see him battle more because 0-3 is not a good representation of his skill. He's got creativity and a unique style that hits well and is a refreshing read.





[Elevation Station]
[Sharp]

This segment is meant to highlight some of the cats that mighta flown under the radar this season, but still deserve some shine for their improvement. Even if their records didn't reflect it these were some of the bigger stories of the season – sticking around and honing your skill is not for the faint of heart.

Wanderer
Apparently Wanderer found NC a few years ago on NC1 and decided to see if we were still going. Coming back he was all rust from a pretty inexperienced background, but he stuck through it and really managed to grow.

IamRhetoric
Rhet had some solid attitude development first tbh – it's good watching people go from trying to win to trying to have a good battle. Beyond that he's got a style that shows he watches and knows live battles and is slowly transitioning to text. I like what I've seen from him so far and he has a ton of potential.

iSpaz
This dude had some of the laziest concept selection that bogged his good wording down, then once he figured it out he showed he can hang with some of the better dudes we have. He's definitely going to be one to watch in the immediate future.

Tic
Definitely not a new guy in his 3rd season looks better than ever and even managed to champ. Worth the mention for living up to the promise he showed when he started.

Unfukwitable
Showed up around the same time as Tic but really started turning heads this season. He's had the creativity but really grew into his own style this season. He's one of the few cats that I think does legit damage with generic bars, and you can't undervalue that shit.

Fraze/Remy Lebeau/Razah/Junto etc
To all the dudes that showed up from hiatuses or whatever and did their thing, props. You get the shoutout for any personal elevation but mostly for helping the league as a whole grow. Fraze is the big standout in this category to me, because dude went from just having clever ideas with iffy delivery to creative ideas with creative delivery – this is my new dude to watch and right now I think he's the most slept on battler we have going. Junto gets a shoutout but he just showed up and merked, doesn't really count as much here.


[Around the Site]

-In case you missed it, NC's own ART OF WRITING LEAGUE, aka the most consistent and arguably best league we've had in the post NC.com world, has begun it's Fifth Season. They've had modding powerhouses at the reins and as of right now Split Eight aka Dr Dog and a strong supporting cast are in charge. If you're a fan of how NBL mags have been this is the guy who gave us the format and style, so AOWL mags will be the ones to be featured in. You can read battles/sign into the league here.

-The 1-2 Punch League, designed in part by last year's mod BROKE LESNAR and to be co-run by the NBL's Allen Knight and Sharp Nine is gearing up for what could be its best season yet. You can read about it and sign in for it here. But the league won't start until the second round of playoffs goes up, so be sure to drop on time and vote.

-Netcees Tag Tourney is set to begin, modded by none other than our own Hush. Depending on your activity since signing in, you may want want to double check that Hush knows you're active. You can check that out here.

-Hush's Battle Arena Tourney begins its First Round. You can read the battles here.

-Lama the Lime straight up murders the most American of Eagles that used to grace our homepage then proceeds to rip off poor Bags' head. RIP.




[Highlight Battles]
[Sharp]

No doubt this season had flames. While we'll focus on individuals more in the next mags' top season punches, this feature is to cover the battles where both guys brought flames.


Knucklehead vs Trag.
Knuck wins by KO

Quote:
Tragic aka Kyo

Don't fight back, 'cus I got a short fuse & give schmucks a hurtin
If Kyrie act to me I'ma beat him 'til his knees are more fucked than Irvings
Left dead or in a coma, show up w/ AR's & I'm extendin' them clips
Call me Agent K... You'll see a flash then wake up not remembering shit
If you do survive ^, It doesn't matter 'cus I gotta lot of flare
U're fucked.. 'Cus that light at the end of the tunnel's what brought u there
U azn cunt. bring karate kicks to a knife fight u gettin' slammed G
Go to war & I'ma put a blade in your gut like you dishonored your family
This chinks chick is huge, that hoe is on some goon shit
I've Metrics a lil hefty.. yours can't even be weighed in annyy of it's units
I'm oldschool w/ killings, bloodsheds my cologne - That shit is the best
Fuck an Axe, I'mma Musket up.. You'll run in to a spray & get hit in the chest
I got zipperheads like u baggin' H, don't talk like u a source bitch
You see I Centaur around... You're just half of a man & full of horse shit

Quote:
Originally Posted by Trag.
U fagt. every night he takes his mans dick to throat
scuffin his big brass, knucks...til ur chin looks like it been hit with those
I'm pretty rusty, but K'll get iced if he fight with me
Canuck have flames? not likely... less it's the canadian hockey rivalry
U get bitches how? A pick up artist ugly as a damn ape..
His secret starts wit clubbin.... over heads n knuck'll-dragger to his man cave
We ride 8 deep...my goons keep them burners waitin
Hit a few sets up and target all different body parts like circuit training
I fuck around and blast shit til it makes my hand twitch cray
three head shots make everything in his cap disappear... that's a hat trick play
Keep ur ho in line. those txts on my s5's a travesty
Its like I need to go SS3 Goku to stop ur boo from blowin up my galaxy
I have dream threesomes, my handsome ass is better than him
Givin a high five to his boy for gettin their number is closest he was to sharing a 10
One of the best regular, non contender or champ matches of the season IMO. Consistent and creative from both, nothing to say beyond props.


Champ Match: Cashius vs Sharp
Cashius wins by Split Decision

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cashius
While I'm searching for pussy for taking down, you're looking for dudes to lay and pound
When a girl asks "What's your sign?" you hold up the one that says "Gay and Proud"
You're certainly whack, kid. Can't clash with Cash...that courage, you lack it
I understand why people think that you're Split...it's cuz your half nerd and half faggot
I got home videos of hitting pussy that would leave you pissing on yourself
If YOU'RE making a video with box in it...I bet that it's prolly similar to Zelf's
Hush wants to know how to grow outdoors...he's cutting and bagging on occasion
You wanna know how to grow outdoors too...
Cause your childhood was nothing but Dungeons and Dragons in your basement.
Bitches never flock...Ain't none of'em licking on your cock, kid...
If a chick is even seen with Sharper Image will plummet quicker then their stock did
I won't lie though...I see you fucking some of these broads hard...
But either shar pei for them bitches or they're uglier than those dogs are
Word on the street is you're hung 3cm...that shit is a joke, you twerp
I don't care how hard that Nine Inch Nails a bitch...it still wouldn't be known to Hurt
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sharp
Your champ run's 'bout to end in pain. Trust, Sharp'll waste you
Fuck ending on a sour note, this'll make Jamie Foxx's Anthem look tasteful
Said he wants a Karaoke win streak. That'd cut the league's progress
If C span goes for 10 weeks it'd be fucking duller than their coverage of Congress
I'm laid back and low key. As exciting as me? Please, b
After college I cleaned up my act... you picked up the personality of a squeegee
Those accomps are ALL NC2. Zero competition is what's spurring your climb
Face it. You're more dependent on new blood than the Red Cross during wartime.
You're still champ cause jil blew it. For real, those stanzas sucked
Had Jameis'in everywhere... no surprise you looked worse than the Tampa Bucs
You can barely drop a minimum. You got no motivation or you're a frugal cock
Your account isn't just missing drive. It makes me nostalgic for Google docs
You'd let your favorite battlers defile you. It wouldn't help anyway, bub
you want a trickle down effect...
But lookin at your bars its clear Bags is just interested in that anime slut
Not to talk myself up here, but considering it was a split decision against Cash I had to have a decent verse right? Shit was close and IMO both Cash's and my best verse of the season despite rushing... I used the phrase 'frugal cock' lol


GAmen vs Muff
Muff wins by KO

Quote:
Originally Posted by Glossy Finish Dick Lips
ay yo. Look here u cuddly fat brown gum drop.
Talm bout spittin shit. I'll spit in ur butt then nut on ur back ...an I suck cocks!
I'll fuck ur diabetic father in his asshole with a candy cane.
shit pussy. I'll do a 5 man bukake car scene with the men in ur family in the handi lane
U kno how much I wanna kiss u on the mouth rite now?
NIGGA ..... U know how many shit covered jizz stains are on my couch rite now!?!
I'm on ur sub. Lurking. Ready to have risky sex w a guy.
dear muff. Ur dad just died. ..... don't cry... it's fine...I'm gon finger u while u write text online
Ur mothers a white owl on the prowl for black guy weiners.
LOOK....U wann cure that light fever....open ur mouth for this Spanish white pipe cleaner
No jokes. I will enter u and hibernate. Now we're on a date.
oh by the way. I'm late. JOKES ON U BITCH. I'm pregnant an I'm starting to dialate!
Now we @ a parent teacher conference. Muff Jr speakin nonsense...
trynna lick his freakin pockets an u so confused....I'm like...guess the diabetes got him

serious u owe me support.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Muff
time to shake the rust off

You fucking deceptive, namestealing, troll p.o.s

Keeeeyyystyyle

you can try to to flee. One ending: I'm merkin u faggot
I'll stand over you n watch ur death rattle, snake. so much4 runnin Ina serpentine fashion
I'm ambitious. my Nigs txt me from Amsterdam n I'm itching to come
Going is on my bucket list..while ur bucket list consists of wishes 2 stop pissin In one
youVe got trash ways. Your a clever faggot
ur like a bad safety
Whenever there's a Pass Made..you just let it happen
. Yo bitch hungry n needs a hero dude
I'll take her to eat.
u can't foot the bill..nigga u collect change in steel toe boots
bitch nigga stay in place. Abort operation saving face
Fuck Amen. I'll eat your fucking food while your saying grace.
Muff's ridiculous,. Your stuffs insignificant
I'll draw blood,create art.. n watch cops Canvas the area 4 witnesses
Full Metal Jacket bitch..I got that vibrant style
lol Sleep on me w/ that Bunk n get beat w/ these Bars like Private Pyle
One of the best troll verses I've ever seen. Bags killed it. Extra bonus, his 'Amen' account was merged with real Amen's Gloss account so that post is now attached to Amen's face. Troll game unbeatable. An extra bonus here was Muff moving back into creativity. Dude fucked around but had some clever ideas in there that you can see formed the beginnings of his newer style, like it or not.

Contender Match: Junto vs Sn00p
Sn00p wins by Split Decision

Quote:
Originally Posted by Junto
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sn00p
@Junto, now w/ ur explanation that line works a lot better. i kinda feel bad now cuz that might'a changed my voter after all. not that it mattered in the end, but still.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Junto
don't beat yourself up over it partner... I'll see you soon enough
Time to handle that.

ay...

How long it take for u to make this level? your outlooks shitty & it's gray
I start again from scratch & I'm back to dope REAL quick - I'm like Strikta in that way
Got a shank for your spleen, plus this spade that'll have your bowels shoveled
I could always shoot. But my gameplan's attack ur center like he's in early foul trouble
Neighbor, Allen, Cashius --- that's a list of respected guys I'd wanna beat
I came here to battle peers... not crack a little fuckin clam off the side of one to eat
Weren't around in the hay day, but now you're a vet? that's a sorrow...
If you could go back in time you would die more deaths than Edge of Tomorrow
This guy daydreams bout himself really walkin thru the hood... all amped
Snoop, son... come to LA. You'll have bullets flyin at you, no Bruins football camp
New weekend new city. I hit the clubs, bring back some ass & smoke cool blunts
u prolly get a room & board. Then complain when ur parents still ask for the full month's
Closest thing u seen to filthy rich, so I won't get personal wit ya type. Silly bitch
Send my team to kill eem quick... & I 'll just be off to the side lookin past you like Jilti pic
Sure Snoop... you mighta made some moves in the text slump
but if they ask Who the future? ya can tell em its Jun.. now that I knock'd u into next month
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sn00p

this kid got ambition...

& i ain't hatin' if u wanna go for the champ
got the knife pointed at ya throat. shit, i really HOPE u advance
a hoe in his pants? jun's girl doesn't rly sleep w/ men
ususally she blames it on her period. & he's like 'aw, it's that time of the week again?!'
getting love only from prostitutes must've driven u insane. this square is truly lame
strip club big shot. seems u turned to greed to fill the empty space like aero's username
Quote:
Originally Posted by Junto vs Orc
Look if it's beef I let the heat do the checkin - it's so easy wit weapons
Bring ya whole crew to see me... after some words I'll drop 'ichio' like a BB impression
^that's ironic. i mean idk if this kid reads news...
but the way u die here... seems like u're doing a BB impression this week too
& to be sure he dies in the dirt, i empty the mag when fighting this nerd
make the whole clip dissappear like no, i don't need help w/ microsoft word
orchids wp? i'm dough boy, make ur punk ass turn over & get snuffed for that nonsense
if you make anyone turn over, it's vets in their graves cuz u bite & butcher their concepts
this kinda stuff is the onset. u're the most delusional of all ur pals, u bitch
i mean thinking u can win this, u're just playing urself like Being John Malkovich
the abortion was shameful. at least get that little girl a nice casket
we've seen Jun nip'er in the Bud. let's just hope a Berry'll be there right after
Even though Junto had just beaten Orc the week before with a dope verse, this battle really displayed how big of a threat he and Sn00p turned out to be. This battle came at a point where the league needed big competition and these guys showed we had it.


Champ Match: King Karaoke vs ill nik-A
Karaoke wins by Split Decision

Quote:
Originally Posted by King Karaoke
Hi...


My aunt died from an overdose, in my opinion you both are losers
Cuz where I'm from we respect the dudes selling the drugs, not the users
Your addiction is embarrassing, you put Cubans to shame
It's crazy when ur wife goes to the bathroom to powder her nose & u do the same
My block's a Crip block, I could've been loc too
The only Rollin' 20's you're around are used to sniff coke through
U wish u could get J's as income but u claim every sneaker bar is played and been done
It's funny how you say you're tired of Jordan lines yet every Saturday you're in one
I'm on some killer shit, I got a semi that's filled with ammo
And the whole magazine is dedicated to this Cuban like Cigar Aficionado
When it comes to your style, I admit I'm not a lover
Cuz Those lines are about as drawn out as Uh Oh's album cover
No one liked your music, u aren't the type of dude that the girls chase
Makes sense that you're in No Autographs when u don't get asked for 1 in the 1st place
Comparing yourself to epmd, Rakim and brand Nubian is lame, queer
When u said that ur from the school of those guys, it's cuz u all graduated the same year

Bye...
Quote:
Originally Posted by ill nik-A
ya played concepts go back to when apple was daring to Eve
Times aint the same; I got a smart watch while ur creepy ass wont quit starin at me
are u a fairy or G? u actin like a little kid who thinks life aint fair
Sippy cup has to be in the discussion… cuz ur creative juices never get out of there
plus feeling out of place tells us whose portrayin a damn nerd
cant get passed ya comfort level, boss… big white guy dressed in a hood sayin the N word
u suffering from severe identity crisis & this whore just never quits
those white lies bring up red flags… insultin real blacks for supportin confederates
u irrelevant, only wack dudes say ya generics make ya flows gaudy
& u don’t only buy into that… u’re on a shopping spree for Mr. Nobody
Its play time; u hate gun bars & I got bullets to quickly spray mine
u robbed Snoop… but this week u don’t have a shot when I’m giving K-9
ya black homie’s a racist & ya white one talks black & schemes
u shoot to sound real… cuz u’re putting ya friends on blast in a text magazine
aint bad as me; 4-1 vs the dude talkin crazy with all that self-hype
hall of fame’s such a touchy subject… & u in a straightjacket wishin u knew what it felt like
Just dope. Dope.


Contender Match: Muff vs Junto
Junto wins by Split Decision

Quote:
Originally Posted by Junto
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dre -- Week 12 Chat
Example of a solid text battler, is Karaoke...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Muff
What makes the nbl great is the different characters/styles
Junto is polar opposite of kara conceptually for instsnce.
But they both nice
and you lucky you deleted that visitor message...
'' Big bro don't be mad at me plz! i <3 u! ''
hahaha


yo...

My biggest fan... so you in love? That shit ain't cute you need checkin
If I jumped off a fuckin bridge & that was the end of Jun... you'd leap second
Look how we spendin our time... Saturday night I'm out drinkin Henne wit dimes...
Spittin game at the Bar... This faggot's here PM'in Hi Cronus ;) & sendin me lines
I could air you out lay you flat... unfair cuz you ain't never stayin strapped
So I'll take the gun & make u eat the butt instead... u won't need tips from Dre for that
You're on here day & night, this the only way you pass time you bitch
Jesus... your Sleep Number the amount of days since last time you did
Oh you the king?! bro around me don't get that fuckin tone
Cuz u NOT Lebron... take 6 to ya chest wit the heat & u ain't never comin home
I try to write how I live... what you rap is nothin like what you've did
Homie ain't hard, no bud tender... I live in Cali, I'll have u delivered right to the crib
I hit the 7-eleven cuz me n your mom was needin a dutch
She gettin the Big Gulp special all summer too if we gon keep it a buck
I'm tellin u bitch. Actin out like u been doin, that's how melons get split
u belong in a circus... keep bein a nut u'll get rolled up in the trunk like an elephant trick



...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Muff
Quote:
Originally Posted by Junto View Post
MUFF YOU FUCK

u ask the God for a critique... I provide gospel... ask nothin in return for my wisdom
& you go vote against me an hour later? hahaha
What a lame faggot. You suck w/ the Pen
You got Fucking Devoured by Tic n you let my vote Get Under Your Skin?
That alias shit is str8 FAGGOT. You KNOW it's fake
But it's like that New Recognition Tech
We can Tell you are A Bitch before you even show your Face
Quote:
Originally Posted by Junto Opener vs Tic View Post
You made it here by no luck. Hush set ya up to get punk'd now you queer.
way to go... read below, it's the suggested route to send you the fuck outta here.
now let's let down to business. U weak when you scribe
Ill Call tic a Trapdoor Spider
you Messed around w/ that^ Opening... Then got Fucking Eaten Alive
This Liars mine. How lame u are Inquires Minds
Ur like dinosaurs in Jurrasic Park. We know Ur Fake. You ACTUALLY had the Fuzz on you the Entire Time
Ima chemist w/ words. It's clear you Been just a Bird
Ur shits not Fly. You just Flip n End up Behind My Craft like an Immelman Turn
U sell dope? I'll rob u . Fuck who funds ya bricks
U think the Grass is Solid Footing. But if You Step? You'll die in the Trap no Punji Sticks
Won't show ur pic?Bro you coward as hell
But ull know I'm the Greatest when I Reach up N Lift Your Wig..no Interviews w/ Howard Cosell
This pussy gets ran thru EASY. it's like he lacking a hymen
It'll be Cold as Fuck the way u Die n Amaze... n Now im Jackin ur Shining

Suck a dick




[IMG]http://imgfave-herokuapp-com.global.ssl.fastly.net/image_***he/1350845502845114.jpg[/IMG]

Yeah, I thought Muff's verse here was creative. Both had flames though, Junto was just deadly and took the well deserved win.



Think we're missing any? That's because there will be more in the next edition of the playoffs mag - shoving an entire season of battles into here would've been waaaaay to wordy. Stay tuned douchenozzles.






[Previews]

King Karaoke vs Chyeahhh!!!
[Sharp]
This could be dope, Chyeahhh hit a stride with his style at the end of this past season and he's always been creative. Karaoke is the best clutch battler doing it... hopefully he's still doing text somewhere but after all that discussion shit I don't think he'll be back any time soon. I don't blame him but shit's weak. If he shows this can be a lowkey dope battle because chyeahhh's a slept on battler but I don't see this one going down.

Chyeahhh!!!: 70/30

[Knuck]
This would have been a landslide if Karaoke didn't leave. Chyeahhh has gotten better recently but still pretty low tier for the most part. If he continues elevating maybe one day he could beat someone on Karaokes level but yeah. He's lucky he left.

Chyeahhh: 100/0 by default

Sn00p vs Odd Ways
[Sharp]
Already open for votes. Props guys, get voting

[Knuck]
Cool one here. Sn00p has been killing it whenever he drops recently and is super creative with polished wording and killer delivery. Odd is up and down from what I've seen, which a lot of has been FN verses so maybe he's just not quick. This could be close but I'm taking Sn00p here easy most likely.

Sn00p: 70/30

Tic vs Unfukwitable
[Sharp]
The two less experienced heads that have really started to gain momentum are up here, Tic's status got pushed up by champing while Unfuk's Nsing knocked him down a bit. Truthfully it's hard to say here – Tic's better about dropping heat while Unfuk has been showing a lot of consistency lately. If Tic does his thing though, I think he has an advantage, but Unfuk still has a solid chance of taking this one.

Tic: 60/40

[Knuck]
Close and dope one. Two of the most developed txtcees in the past year and both could be the next legends. I think Unfuk is more harsh and a little grimier, but Tic has more out of the box bars and better wording. Toss up tbh, but should be good.

Tic: 55/45

Junto vs Cred
[Sharp]
This could be dope. Junto is capable of beating anyone and has been consistent all season. Cred has serious skill at times but consistency hasn't always been there. That's likely to be a big factor here. Considering Junto's won the only tourney he's done here we know he can drop dope when needed. As one of the most likely guys to champ Cred is going to need to come with his absolute best here. He's got the delivery and style but if his ideas aren't fresh Junto has a huge advantage.

Junto: 65/35

[Knuck]
Shittt. I haven't seen Junto drop since he left awhile ago, but I'm assuming that wasn't enough time to get rusty at all. Cred has been killing it IMO and has some harsh straight forward shit. He's consistently good with one or two haymakers per verse, but Junto can have mostly haymakers and maybe a miss. I think it'll be a close battle and one of those open when the rest are closed cus it goes back n forth since both are similar and so different at the same time. I think coming off a tourney win Junto has the steam behind him to edge it.

Junto: 60/40

(R) Orc vs (R) Bust
[Sharp]
Man, Orc is Orc is Orc. I'm not about to list his accolades cause at this point, pretty much everyone knows it. And Bust is pretty much the exact opposite – I barely know who the dude is. He's been a bit inconsistent at times though he's shown he knows how it goes. My theory is he's been on and off with effort but he'll need all of it to stand a chance here. I really have no idea what he's capable of but it probably won't be enough to beat Orc if he's motivated.

Orc: 70/30

murda sho vs ill nik-A
[Sharp]
Damn this is a dope first round matchup. This very easily could've been a finals match but the way it worked out we get it right away. Nik deserves props for the way he competes, despite doing it all he still battles like he's got something to prove – and it's honestly reasonable in the sense that this is a new competition pool in a different time and he comes out on top pretty consistently. Sho is a dope battler who's creativity has made him stand out lately. Nik's been good all season, though he's had some tough split decisions. His last L was against Unfukwitable who reminds me a Sho's style. This one could go either way and I wouldn't be surprised. I really can't call it.

Either way: 50/50

[Knuck]
This will be interesting. Sho is on a roll and dropping heat back to back every week and just won the first biggish tourney we've had in awhile. He also did that using just BARS no gimmicks and personals. With those he's even grittier. nik-A I'd say would win a year ago but he's rusty from his hiatus and idk if he's back to full power yet, while murda is just getting better. BOTW if Hush and AK doesn't happen.

murda sho: 60/40

Destroyer vs iSpaz
[Sharp]
These two man... I've seen the best from both and while it hasn't always been there, they've brought it towards the end of the season. Des has really creative delivery of concepts but sometimes he goes for the low hanging fruit kinda ammo. Spaz actually had the same problem holding him back for awhile, and the big difference between the two is probably that Des has a more creative style, but Spaz has more consistency. So if Des doesn't have it together he could very easily get upset here. That said I think Des can get this one with his experience and creativity. Should be a cool one either way.

Destroyer: 60/40

[Knuck]
Destro da God, I never know with him. He comes dope then bad then half and half. This depends if he keys. iSpaz is one of them new dudes making moves and getting better with every drop. I can't call it 100& tbh but I'll hope Des comes strong as he can and say he takes it.

Destroyer: 70/30

fraze vs Lotto Smirk
[Sharp]
Round 3 for these guys I think? Sorry thats how it worked out guys. But at this point the two are now tag partners, which could definitely change the dynamic here. I've talked up fraze for the last few weeks, he has creative bars and has come up with really interesting ways of making them hit. In my opinion he's the most slept on battler active here – tbh I'm amazed how some of his references are reacted to. Lotto has creative concepts that are more likely to strike a chord with the battle crowd, and even if he's just being generic he actually has a good way of making his delivery feel personal. If he doesn't take the time to word his stuff well his verses can really suffer. Assuming both bring it this could be nice as shit, but I think right now fraze is just a hair better. Could definitely go either way, especially if one sleeps.

Fraze: 55/45

[Knuck]
Lotto has been out for awhile and was just getting the hang of things before and fraze has had a good season with losses whenever you faces a big name. Lotto isn't one and I'm assuming still rusty, and his wording will hurt him while Fraze is pretty solid there. Could go differently but I got..

fraze: 70/30

RESERVE MATCHES

Remy Lebeau vs Swerve
[Sharp]
Could be dope here. Remy can hang with most battlers while Swerve at his best is deadly. Probably the best reserve battle were have this week. The difference here will probably be Swerve – we have a good sense of Remy's style but Swerve could come back to it in full form or rusted over. If he's back to where he was he's got good odds, but it's not easy to predict.

Either Way: 50/50

[Knuck]
I guess Remy had a good verse against Orc last week and it tied or something? Idk but he's def an alias so probably okay. Swerve was dope but he's been inactive. If Swerve is rust proff he takes it in a close one, but I'm guessing he has some to shake off so..

Remy LeBeau: 60/40

IAmRhetoric vs Witty
[Sharp]
Rhet's been coming along, props to you man, but Witty is exactly what you wanna see from a battler. Humor, wordplay, creativity and all in his own style. He's a tight match for anyone and now that he's looking motivated he's gonna be tough competition. Rhetoric's creativity is what's holding him back and Witty just wins that category 9 times out of 10.

Witty: 70/30

[Knuck]
Witty got slept on even for me until that one fight night. Dude has bars. Rhet was terrible last I read him and don't see how he'd elevate too much in a few weeks. Will probably be close since Witty still ain't a complete battler.

Witty: 55/45

Greed vs GAmen aka Bags
[Sharp]
Greed's been the poster child for wording beating concepts. Creative as fuck but sometimes he just can't finish with a bar. When he does, though, it's nice as shit. And he's been a lot better about that this past season than I've ever seen. Bags being rusty could give Greed an advantage, we've seen the already done neckhole shit done to double death this season so he'll have to be creative to take it. This one really will depend on Bags and I'm looking forward to it, right now I think it could go either way because the last verse I've seen from both (Greed against Knuck and Bags in FN) were solid.

Either way: 50/50

[Knuck]
Greed is straight awful.

Bags: 90/10

Havoc vs Mr. J
[Sharp]
I think I've been saying how badly J's record represents his skill for the last 3 weeks because he's creative but just doesn't have the harshness in his delivery to keep up with the tough competition he's had. Havoc aka Alphabet has had a goldmine of personals relating to biting pop up but being perfectly honest it's the same kinda shit that happened last week with Cred... if we give one the benefit of the doubt we have to give it to the other. When he puts in effort he's a good, well balanced texcee, but half of his battles end in NS. So Mr. J has a few things going for him that I think could translate into a win. Should be a good read regardless.

Mr. J: 55/45


[Outro]

There you go. Props to our top 16 and to everyone who's shown up. Thanks to everyone for making the season dope and lets keep it going into the playoffs and 1-2 league.
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Old 08-01-2015, 12:11 AM   #2
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good mag, should've talked about me more tho
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Old 08-01-2015, 12:14 AM   #3
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Another dope one
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Old 08-01-2015, 12:21 AM   #4
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good mag, should've talked about me more tho
how bout u show up to the BA & stop duckin
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Old 08-01-2015, 12:21 AM   #5
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Dope mag tho!
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Old 08-01-2015, 12:31 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Unfukwitable View Post
how bout u show up to the BA & stop duckin
what am i ducking fuckboi?

shit aint due til sunday stupid
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Old 08-01-2015, 12:35 AM   #7
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what am i ducking fuckboi?

shit aint due til sunday stupid
oh ight faggot lol
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Old 08-01-2015, 01:04 AM   #8
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oh ight faggot lol
lol your retarded goof
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Old 08-01-2015, 01:09 AM   #9
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lol your retarded goof
lmaoo
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Old 08-01-2015, 01:12 AM   #10
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what am i ducking fuckboi?

shit aint due til sunday stupid
Every battle is pretty much done but urs. Ur holding up the tourney.

Dope mag
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Old 08-01-2015, 01:15 AM   #11
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i'll write and post tomorrow
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Old 08-01-2015, 01:21 AM   #12
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Every battle is pretty much done but urs. Ur holding up the tourney.

Dope mag
Exactly!...
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Old 08-01-2015, 01:39 AM   #13
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good mag, should've talked about me more tho
theres only so much u can say about a biter to get the point across.
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Old 08-01-2015, 02:10 AM   #14
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Quote:
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theres only so much u can say about a biter to get the point across.
lmfaooo x_x
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Old 08-01-2015, 06:02 AM   #15
Orc
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this was dope and motivating
@Allen Knight got me motivated to murder everyone
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Old 08-01-2015, 06:34 AM   #16
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Haha dope mag fired up
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Old 08-01-2015, 06:50 AM   #17
ill nik-A
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Good stuff as always

Props
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Old 08-01-2015, 07:10 AM   #18
~RustyGunZ~
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My bad to anyone's battle I didn't preview. Went off the original battle list so some I did weren't included. Should've checked the rotations
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Old 08-01-2015, 08:51 AM   #19
Destroyer
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good mag
"low hanging fruit?????" @Sharp

I'll show you low hanging fruit
aka my nuts...
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Old 08-01-2015, 09:20 AM   #20
Amen.
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Lol @ Odd ways being King from RB

no he isn't

Dope mag tho guys
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