Week 1: Witty vs. Dancake- WITTY WINS BY NS (OPEN FOR FEED)

Split Eight · 07-15-2015, 02:48 AM

AOWL Season V, Week 1

SUMMARY OF RULES:

Verses are due
Sunday, July 19th, 11:59p.m. PCT
Monday, July 20th 2:59a.m. EST
Monday, July 20th 7:59a.m UK
There are NO extensions.

Verses MUST be a minimum 10 lines or a maximum of 48 lines (or 650 words).

Votes are due Wednesday, July 22nd, 11:00p.m. PCT/8p.m. EST/4a.m. UK. Failure to vote will result in automatic sign out for the next week.

Read the full rules here!

TOPIC:

Good luck @Witty and @Dancake

Witty · 07-15-2015, 10:09 AM

I love you.

PancakeBrah · 07-19-2015, 07:21 PM

And I you

Witty · 07-19-2015, 07:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dancake

And I you

lmao you showing?

PancakeBrah · 07-19-2015, 07:55 PM

I'm going to try. I just realized this was up.

Witty · 07-20-2015, 06:31 PM

I feel the touch, as my skin crawls; it's disgusting
The lusting stare throughout all of the thrusting
Adjusting my seat, so my customer feels at ease
And unzipping the jeans as I fall to my knees
The patron of filth for all the night's sleaze
I kiss and I lick, without meeting the eyes
Feeling the rise of demons that eat me inside
I don't do it cuz I like it, I do it for the rent
I do it for the dollar and I do it for the cent
No one's gonna save me, superman's a myth
In a world full of villains, only lex luthor can exist
My customer stares, lost in my tired eyes
Complete lack of emotion the cost of expired cries
A prisoner in plain view, frequent visitor of hell
My cell invisible, the land of pity where i dwell
Treat me like a doormat, wipe your dirty feet
Tread upon my spirit, leave me cryin' on the street
Show me I'm a dirty whore, treat me like it too
Choke my undeserving throat, beat me black n blue
Tell me that you hate me, make me gasp and weeze
You can scrape and maim me, just pay me as u leave
I'll cry as you drive away as grief makes me bezerk
I'm just a male hooker, on the street waiting for work.

Woke · 07-22-2015, 09:07 PM

Perfect ending with the male references, breathed the picture more life, very unexpected. Loved the verse, I want to meat a girl like this and show her a good night, at least for me.

2tripple0 · 07-22-2015, 09:17 PM

Lol I was going to say this was dope til I realised it was about a male prostitute lol the mechanics were nice the flow was tight lol just thought u could have dealt with the topic in a different way lol can't understand why you chose to take the verse thst way but regardless it was written well and I look forward to seeing more from you. Good luck with the rest of ya shit in this league

07-15-2015, 02:48 AM	#1
Split Eight ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Join Date: Feb 2015 Posts: 1,633 Battle Record: 3-5 Champed - Haiku Writers Challenge Rep Power: 85899376	Week 1: Witty vs. Dancake- WITTY WINS BY NS (OPEN FOR FEED) AOWL Season V, Week 1 SUMMARY OF RULES: Verses are due Sunday, July 19th, 11:59p.m. PCT Monday, July 20th 2:59a.m. EST Monday, July 20th 7:59a.m UK There are NO extensions. Verses MUST be a minimum 10 lines or a maximum of 48 lines (or 650 words). Votes are due Wednesday, July 22nd, 11:00p.m. PCT/8p.m. EST/4a.m. UK. Failure to vote will result in automatic sign out for the next week. Read the full rules here! TOPIC: Good luck @Witty and @Dancake

07-15-2015, 10:09 AM	#2
Witty Lime Life Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 16,794 Battle Record: 30-41 Accomplishments - Only Slightly Retarded Champed - Lyric Olympics - Summer Classic Rep Power: 82986458	I love you. __________________ He listens to voices inside of his mind Explicit and poisonous violent crime.

07-19-2015, 07:21 PM	#3
PancakeBrah SOBER Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 13,052 Battle Record: 2-5 Champed - AOWL Season 2 Rep Power: 85899406	And I you __________________ If I ventured in the slipstream Between the viaducts of your dreams Where immobil steel rims crack And the ditch in the back road stop Could you find me?

07-19-2015, 07:55 PM	#5
PancakeBrah SOBER Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 13,052 Battle Record: 2-5 Champed - AOWL Season 2 Rep Power: 85899406	I'm going to try. I just realized this was up. __________________ If I ventured in the slipstream Between the viaducts of your dreams Where immobil steel rims crack And the ditch in the back road stop Could you find me?

07-20-2015, 06:31 PM	#6
Witty Lime Life Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 16,794 Battle Record: 30-41 Accomplishments - Only Slightly Retarded Champed - Lyric Olympics - Summer Classic Rep Power: 82986458	I feel the touch, as my skin crawls; it's disgusting The lusting stare throughout all of the thrusting Adjusting my seat, so my customer feels at ease And unzipping the jeans as I fall to my knees The patron of filth for all the night's sleaze I kiss and I lick, without meeting the eyes Feeling the rise of demons that eat me inside I don't do it cuz I like it, I do it for the rent I do it for the dollar and I do it for the cent No one's gonna save me, superman's a myth In a world full of villains, only lex luthor can exist My customer stares, lost in my tired eyes Complete lack of emotion the cost of expired cries A prisoner in plain view, frequent visitor of hell My cell invisible, the land of pity where i dwell Treat me like a doormat, wipe your dirty feet Tread upon my spirit, leave me cryin' on the street Show me I'm a dirty whore, treat me like it too Choke my undeserving throat, beat me black n blue Tell me that you hate me, make me gasp and weeze You can scrape and maim me, just pay me as u leave I'll cry as you drive away as grief makes me bezerk I'm just a male hooker, on the street waiting for work. __________________ He listens to voices inside of his mind Explicit and poisonous violent crime.

07-22-2015, 09:07 PM	#7
Woke Senior Member Join Date: May 2015 Posts: 183 Battle Record: 6-4 Rep Power: 553415	Perfect ending with the male references, breathed the picture more life, very unexpected. Loved the verse, I want to meat a girl like this and show her a good night, at least for me.

07-22-2015, 09:17 PM	#8
2tripple0 death warmed over Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: Downstairs illstreet dam Posts: 2,564 Battle Record: 6-21 Rep Power: 0	Lol I was going to say this was dope til I realised it was about a male prostitute lol the mechanics were nice the flow was tight lol just thought u could have dealt with the topic in a different way lol can't understand why you chose to take the verse thst way but regardless it was written well and I look forward to seeing more from you. Good luck with the rest of ya shit in this league __________________ https://soundcloud.com/user-876573949/ https://soundcloud.com/user-634430314/