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Old 02-07-2020, 05:32 PM   #1
Exis
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Default Exis & Candy - This Our Shit...

Ayo...

I see the bitch in these nigga's,
Quick to switch & snitch to a pig huh?
Clips in your liver,
Put my fist thru your vigor
Put these chickens to bed,
Trick a bitch into strippin' for scrilla
& fuckin' for payments,
No credit cards,
Break you up into little shards
Like glass,
Grippin' the stainless fuck a credit debt
My trigger set is evident,
Stop your whinin' and cryin' bitch
Hand over your pocket watch and just learn to fuckin' sit
When this rocket pops,
It just stops and gawks at the profits kid
Metal scent,
Rainin' down bullets is only Heaven sent
I don't settle for bench,
If I'm in a crew then I'm the fuckin' President
All your news is irrelevant,
Bitch ass tricks and ass pickers sniffin' the sediment
Rippin' on kids for kickin' shit,
Without the resonance
Screamin' at the top of they voice with speech impediments
They elements can't even reach preachin' the weakest reverends
It never ends,
I'm back into bendin' arms and severin' heads again
Sense is perception,
Hella corrections,
Fellas they represent
To they're detriment,
Fuckin' with Exis
You'll get set into wet cement
Emcees gettin' swept from my set,
Like Bruce or Jet Li's fuckin' legs just connect
Limbs will get wrecked,
Put in check like bishops and knights
Checkin' mates with they fingers,
Innocent types accept fate where it lingers
Physically hyped,
My pen clenched...
I write hate within scriptures.


i am boosted through shooting star thorough bred
said yes so many times debt put me in neglect
selection of natural events in actual depends
diapers in cyphers i shit out the the hyphen hyped in
hemogloben choken out competitions focus unnoticed
hoping for soaking of the carpet your parts partly broke in
woah this candy taste like wasted facelifts and tit reduction
im busting in broken flusters in cuffs thrusting
one touch to two i must comprehend the scribbles
i dabble and dribble in fables so simply drizzeled
fizzy in shock therapy name after name.. who am i
sam of summers a colt in hand and cult in brand for the knew them slight
the killers of wheelers and dealers dealt
felt tip pens and juvinals held high on scalps
torn and tethered from the measurements of their split
dipping fists in glass to spark imagination in their mits
each hit.. captured in swings kuckles to cheeks
i speak tongue in reach of removal
only approval rolling steam whispers peeling clovers
long lasting and strolling the gloves it needs for the covers
i muster the shakes of whatevers in stiff upperlips
god damn it it grips and strips the ducking lifts
with this ment for insight of gifts to gifs in modern riffs
faggot to ass my mission on god has a name in these pits
reflections and shifts of misfits with pistols and shits
like giggles i jiggle and jangel my keys unmanaged
chaos and tenderness unphathomed i damage
the carnage of carnivals i tip toe through the tulips
with disco dancing hair cuts and budgets of your lips
or this more or less im fruitless with this firearm im missing
waving my hands in the bullets off neo while im pissing
let it reign.
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Old 02-08-2020, 02:46 AM   #2
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Sorry I just can't get into it.

BTW these Exis collabs are just two unrelated verses; one under the other.

As far as feed goes I felt like this was a sub-par Exis keystyle. Meaning it's trite and I've seen better from him.
Candy's verse was nonsensical and contained grammatical errors.

Oh well. If it makes you feel any better I'm not much better. I just think this could be better.
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Old 02-08-2020, 06:45 AM   #3
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Smh...good looks.
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Old 02-08-2020, 07:52 AM   #4
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respect,,
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Old 02-11-2020, 02:03 PM   #5
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I honestly didn't mind Exis' verse here. I liked the speech impediment section. Candy's was a little... over my head, I guess I'll say.

But Exis, this post aside, when I read your stuff it just seems like you rush it. You said it yourself, something along the lines of "I'm every bit as good as all you, I just don't try as hard". I remember seeing that line and being like... "but why don't you"?

Whatever effort you put into your verses... double it. You will see results. You obviously care enough and I can tell you tried a little more here, and it shows. Just hold yourself to a higher standard because let me tell you... the secret to success in any form of writing is patience.
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Old 02-11-2020, 10:08 PM   #6
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thanks..
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Old 02-13-2020, 10:15 PM   #7
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@Adverse...Thanks for the feed bro, it's always appreciated.Seriously I don't know I just key & don't actually sit down & take my time to write...I've just always been like that, as I've said previously the only two verses I've ever edited that I can remember were battles against Vulgar & Copy on Rapflava a decade or so ago.I know some people spend weeks & shit on a verse perfectin' it & whatnot, but yeah I just can't seem to be able to do it...I'll try, send you what I come up with & you can critique man as I respect your opinion...

Thanks again for the feed my friend, stay upright.
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Old 02-13-2020, 10:18 PM   #8
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@Universe, my bad tagged the wrong nigga lol...
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Old 02-14-2020, 04:55 AM   #9
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Kinda agreeing that the two verses seem more like standalone pieces and not put together for a thought out project. I also think not polishing verses is what's keeping you from reaching that next level, Exis. You don't have to polish a verse for weeks, lol, but let it linger till next day before posting up and go through it, tweak some shit, add/remove filler lines and words, just those last finishing touches so it comes out clean, you know?

Overall I feel this is more of a cypher thing rather than a collabo project with a concept in mind. It's cool for what it is but that's about it, needs more of what's dope and less fillers to become solid. Cred for writing and posting some tho, it's more than what I've done lately, lol.
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Old 02-14-2020, 08:44 AM   #10
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^^Thank you...I just don't think I'm as ill as I want to be & less shit than people say I am, real talk.

I appreciate your comments fam.
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Old 02-14-2020, 10:18 PM   #11
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Yo, Exis I respect as a writer but chronologicaly you shouldn't put clips on the liver before you put your fist in their vigor...feel me?Also, how is raining down bullets only heaven sent? But yo, other than that you got some firecracker dynamite
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Old 02-14-2020, 10:40 PM   #12
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Idk man lol, Rainin' down bullets? Hmm...I can't shake these absolutely brutal anxiety attacks I get & it feels like God is just not there but I know he is...Just hurts is all, I guess??

Thank you for the comments bro...You been nice lately, kinda weird...Now be nice & show some respect & give some constructive critique to Candy my nigga.

I'll rep you bruh.
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Old 02-15-2020, 10:45 PM   #13
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Word guys it’s been said but I think you could both do better I’ve seen both of you do better in fact. Both seemed rushed in a way and while Candy’s Verse started off well I think it drifted over my head pretty quick. Exis just need to think about your bars a little more and write with a bigger theme in mind, make your Topics a little more organized. It’s all love fellas
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Old 02-15-2020, 11:24 PM   #14
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Gracias for the feed man, I'm seriously takin' on board all that has been said & will put it to practice...Sorry for @ing you by the way, nigga got confused lol.

& again thank you for peepin' our shit.
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