03-06-2018, 11:01 AM | #1 |
Shrewd as evearthed
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ELITE 8: MUFF vs BLEAK - MUFF WINS!
Welcome back, mutherfuckers! We enter round two of Hot or Thot 2018 with a field of just eight battlers remaining. The Elite Eight. The name is pretty boring, but it’s been used right throughout texts tourney history so we’ve decided to stick with it. The Hateful Eight seems a more obvious/better choice to me personally but hey, I’m a Tarantino fan, that’s to be expected. So onto business, we’ve halved the field and now we’re left with just the cream of the crop remaining here. There will be no easy battles from here on out. This is strictly business. Show up, or shut up. It’s that simple. If you don’t have the bars, you’ll be going home. We need that cutthroat shit we all love to read. We lost some heavy hitters last round, so if you’re still here you best be willing to prove that you’ve earned that spot and solified your spot with gorillas. If you’ve made it this far, you surely know by now what’s expected of you all. This is the business end of the tournament, right here! The forum has had some crazy interest from all across the board, some of last rounds battles were so close they had 600+ views a piece! So your audience is there, you just gotta give ‘em something worth reading. This is where legends are made. Once more, I give props to everyone who helped made last round the success it was, that’s from the battlers themselves through to the voters who helped keep things moving along even though they weren’t involved. Much respect to all you motherfuckers man, I see you on that shit. Last round had some crazy ass tight battles and needed 10+ votes a piece to resolve them which is pretty much unheard of in text nowadays especially. That’s enough back-slapping though, lets get back to slapping motherfuckers down lyrically and fatshaming their ex-girlfriends… Rules: 10 lines min 20 lines max (Unless agreed with opponent) Agree to match line limit with opponent Check-ins are advised DUE DATE: Next Tuesday 5pm UK time. The mod teams decision is final on all shenanigans. LETS GET IT IN!!!!!!!!! @Muff @bleak
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03-06-2018, 01:11 PM | #2 |
DOHpe since 02'
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Twenttttyyy
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Bitch I floss . I Got the chain out to see like Constantinople |
03-07-2018, 02:36 AM | #3 |
DOHpe since 02'
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I'm in progress will edit in more lines n take shit out as I please till u post
Iono how one could even possibly invest in this beast Jus coz she looks like Butterbean's niece.. Dsnt mean she's a Knockout by any stretch of the means Looking like she snitched . need I mention the stupor ? Must be hard not to Fold' when your facial structure resembles an egg w/ a Fupa Just plaiiin unattractive . cute? Not even semi.. Shit That's not bad Intel^ . plus this bih got more Misplaced Moles than the Mi6 Its not 'Gods Plan'. but her orbital bones are shaped funny I heard of bags BELOW the eyes . but above em lookin like she went to Sam's Club w/ Drake's money Dawg If she ask for my number bro I'm fkn dumpin the heater She tried2 Jot me down for the D' . but ain't no way I'm fkn the world's ugliest substitute teacher You still communicate . don't fake like you hatin the split Saw u2 play Words w/ Friends . here's some u shud omit : "I actually dated this bitch" Forehead SKRONG af. Bro that shit is a crime U 2 had a Nuclear family until shed give u an Atomic headbutt when u didn't bring the Triscuits on time My wishes coullld come true .. But this chick ruined it: Facts I'd even throw a Nickel in the Fountain but this bitch a soft Two at the max Anyone wud get this hoe with ease .. No need unloading the coin This bitch got a Superdome'.. So u KNOW its gotta be a Brees Scorin some Points How could you possibly take this Thing on a date Looking like she proofreads previously published novels knowing dam well she'll never find a single mistake
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Bitch I floss . I Got the chain out to see like Constantinople Last edited by El Muffin; 03-08-2018 at 12:31 AM. |
03-08-2018, 10:56 PM | #4 | |
yeet
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Ur team Charger Bronco style. But a Chief? there's a vacancy left I'll slide in and Raider thong, my game strong as the AFC West follow those tracks from last round, I omitted and y'all wondered. On your left is Clap &past the Mongols is this horse in the stall yonder. Must be why you left her, cause u had to keep the hoes lonely. 'something smells funny...' she'd find yo bitches w/ her nose only. Joie takin L's today, my guy. Hacksaw Jim Duggan too Hoe, please. she went for Jolie, missed but knew how to trick. in Pitts w/ a John Smith...ur Angelina certain way &make room for the dick You act like this bitch a queen b, and that I just cannot endorse. Ur hive's a vicious circle, she'd fuck the workers on your rotting corpse. He's talkn 'Joie my Mrs.' Her value as wife is what we gon see tho A real mother would let her daughter borrow some of those teeth, bro. Her baby got that wildling look. Like Tormund/Brienne of Tarth. retard odds in the North Range when the Drs. bring in the charts. Tf is w/ that rat's nest? Like half is still matted within the mattress I dreadlocks of eye contact in fear of soul possession by this trap witch. Speaking of: she has her mother's already, that's safe to bet. They say eyes are the gateway... mom skipped that, went straight to meth. Her edit skills are subpar. I'll filter out the whore's guise When I 'shop that family tree &take the twinkle out these 4 eyes @Muff 20 gl man
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Last edited by bleak; 03-09-2018 at 01:12 AM. |
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03-09-2018, 02:49 AM | #5 |
Needs no introduction
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Muff
opener was gd but stretched more than it needed to be misplaced moles lmao nice atomic headbutt same as opener nickel in the fountain was OK super dome lol Bleak opener was decent, raider is played tho north range lol gateway joint lmao fire, easily lotb those were the noteworthies muff's misses were either overworded or missing something bleak's misses were either too simple or underwhelming w/ the wps v/muff consistency |
03-09-2018, 08:34 AM | #6 |
White Earl
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Vicious battle. Good showing.
Muff has Butterbeans niece lmao Drakes money was a cool toss on the bags concwpt. Itl work Substitue teacher was cool. The settup was lmfao @dumpin the heater over the digits hahaha Fountain nickel Superdome Bleak.. Thought ur whole opener on the first pic was a miss bro. Angelina was cool Soul possession was dope and straight to thenmeth was lmfaoo Thought you had a lot of potetnially strong concepts but wording crushed u this week man.. I gotta go muff with an overall more soolid verse. Consistency was there and most of his lines hit even if some were harder than others while a lot of bleaks were misses for me. V\muff. Dope battle dudes
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03-09-2018, 11:08 AM | #7 |
As-salamu alaykum!
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Iono how one could even possibly invest in this beast
Jus coz she looks like Butterbean's niece.. Dsnt mean she's a Knockout by any stretch of the means Had potential but wayyy over worded man. Just plaiiin unattractive . cute? Not even semi.. Shit That's not bad Intel^ . plus this bih got more Misplaced Moles than the Mi6 Lol, funny. If she ask for my number bro I'm fkn dumpin the heater She tried2 Jot me down for the D' . but ain't no way I'm fkn the world's ugliest substitute teacher Lol, funny but over worded again. This shit stretched. Forehead SKRONG af. Bro that shit is a crime U 2 had a Nuclear family until shed give u an Atomic headbutt when u didn't bring the Triscuits on time This was funny up to atomic headbutt - should have left it there. My wishes coullld come true .. But this chick ruined it: Facts I'd even throw a Nickel in the Fountain but this bitch a soft Two at the max Lol, good. Anyone wud get this hoe with ease .. No need unloading the coin This bitch got a Superdome'.. So u KNOW its gotta be a Brees Scorin some Points Ok. vs Must be why you left her, cause u had to keep the hoes lonely. 'something smells funny...' she'd find yo bitches w/ her nose only. This had potential, execution fell flat tho man... Worded lightly. He's talkn 'Joie my Mrs.' Her value as wife is what we gon see tho A real mother would let her daughter borrow some of those teeth, bro. Strong concept - lightly executed tho bro. This could have been bonkers. Tf is w/ that rat's nest? Like half is still matted within the mattress I dreadlocks of eye contact in fear of soul possession by this trap witch. Again, strong concept but execution was light man. Speaking of: she has her mother's already, that's safe to bet. They say eyes are the gateway... mom skipped that, went straight to meth. This was really dope. You needed more of this - props man. Yo, Muff went in as expected but wording was stretched as fuck. Breath nigga, damn. Bleak did ok - struggled with executing some really great concepts he was able to make out of the images. He has potential to be a really dope pic battler - he just needs to work on delivering those type of concepts. Perfect example - the meth bar. That was perfect. Muff got this tho, clearly with less impact with his punches but more of them. He's a seasoned pic battler - he knows exactly how to pick apart concepts from pictures and execute them in a effective way. v/Muff |
03-11-2018, 04:54 PM | #8 |
Shrewd as evearthed
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This one was closer than those votes make it look at 3-0 in Muff's favour, for real...
Muff had that misplaced moles and worlds ugliest substitute teacher shit that was straight up jokes ahahahaha soft two was nice as well. Few people commented on the wording but I honestly didn't mind, thought you did well considering how quick you got this up and had some good observations in there mixed with some clownage. Solid verse throughout, no real lows to it, consistently good hits. Bleak: You had LOTB with that Gateway punch for real, that was ill. Angelina was a cool idea and worded the wordplay well but maybe drew the punch out a little too much that time, if you had executed it in less words it would have hit harder. Nice idea though I thought conceptually. Dreadlocks was much the same here this time out, I enjoyed the idea but the execution maybe took a little of the sting away from them. Muff was guilty of the same to an extent this time out too so it's no slight against you, just trying to give you something to work on for future battles. There wasn't a great deal between the two of you here, the main thing was exactly that - Muff kept the hits consistently good or above that where the wording in some of bleak's maybe room away from the sting of the punchline and allowed Muff to take it. It's certainly closer than the votes look right now, but ultimately it's hard to argue against Muff winning this. Dude did his thing. Bleak continues to improve verse after verse. Muff got it.
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03-15-2018, 06:25 PM | #9 |
Shrewd as evearthed
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Upping for a couple more votes!
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03-15-2018, 08:13 PM | #10 |
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Iono how one could even possibly invest in this beast
Jus coz she looks like Butterbean's niece.. Dsnt mean she's a Knockout by any stretch of the means Just plaiiin unattractive . cute? Not even semi.. Shit That's not bad Intel^ . plus this bih got more Misplaced Moles than the Mi6 f she ask for my number bro I'm fkn dumpin the heater She tried2 Jot me down for the D' . but ain't no way I'm fkn the world's ugliest substitute teacher Anyone wud get this hoe with ease .. No need unloading the coin This bitch got a Superdome'.. So u KNOW its gotta be a Brees Scorin some Points &WTF is SKRONG? @Muff vs He's talkn 'Joie my Mrs.' Her value as wife is what we gon see tho A real mother would let her daughter borrow some of those teeth, bro. This concept was fire just fell flat for me man....Light bar Tf is w/ that rat's nest? Like half is still matted within the mattress I dreadlocks of eye contact in fear of soul possession by this trap witch Speaking of: she has her mother's already, that's safe to bet. They say eyes are the gateway... mom skipped that, went straight to meth. wasnt feelin much more of your verse man. ..Muff took this easy felt muffs verse was a bit lighter than last rounds verse tho. |
03-16-2018, 11:16 AM | #11 |
Scream
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I've got Muff. Will edit in bd.
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03-16-2018, 03:01 PM | #12 | |
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03-16-2018, 03:14 PM | #13 | |
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Punchs-tie Personals- Bleak by an edge Multis-tie Word play- bleak By preference in battle styles vary from y'all's but I think Bleak came out with the win Imo. The closer ended it nice, bit more aggressive with the personals, but still a close call. Idk any of y'all so I can't say shit on that but this was fun to read. Good battle Vote-Bleak |
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