Netcees  

Go Back   Netcees > Vault > Archives > The Netcees archive > Short-Verse Topical Tournament

User Tag List
Geno

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 08-22-2014, 12:41 AM   #1
Certain
Mad fucking dangerous.
 
Certain's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 12,072
Battle Record: 40-19


Champed
- AOWL Season 3
- Art of Writing League (2x)

Rep Power: 85899402
Certain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond reputeCertain has a reputation beyond repute
Default Round 1: 10. Zen vs. R. Orc \\ Orc wins 5-0

Welcome to Round 1!

The Basics

Check-ins are required by Monday, Aug. 25 at 11:59 p.m. PT. If you don't check in, you will be replaced.

Verses are due Friday, Aug. 29 at 11:59 p.m. PT. THERE ARE NO EXTENSIONS.

Votes are due Sunday, Aug. 31 at 11:59 p.m. PT.

Four votes are required from each competitor. For each missing vote, one vote will be deducted. Post proof of voting here.

Verses may not exceed 10 lines. If the length of a writer's lines is called into question, the standard will be 15 words per line, and verses of more than 150 words will be disqualified or required to be shortened.

Standard writing and voting rules are in effect. No biting. No recycling. Votes must be explained. No editing verses after the first vote or the verses deadline. Any other issues will be resolved using Art of Writing League Season 3 rules as the basis.


Topic


Paranoid


Good luck, @Zen and @Orc.
__________________
I'm just swinging swords strictly based on keyboards, unbalanced like elephants and ants on seesaws.
Certain is offline  
Old 08-23-2014, 05:03 PM   #2
Zen
Arm the Homeless
 
Zen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 4,104
Battle Record: 22-24


Champed
- Art of Writing League

Rep Power: 35079719
Zen has a brilliant futureZen has a brilliant futureZen has a brilliant futureZen has a brilliant futureZen has a brilliant futureZen has a brilliant futureZen has a brilliant futureZen has a brilliant futureZen has a brilliant futureZen has a brilliant futureZen has a brilliant future
Default

Hopefully I'll wise up soon.
You know me, I can't lighten up, Jude.
Lonely and crying, fuck you.
But...I'm only trying to love you.
Fuck.
Don't leave me, you'll regret it.
For your old teacher Mr. Edwards.
Please, hold me! I'm pathetic.
I'm only keeping us together.
Hopelessly forever...

Last edited by Zen; 08-25-2014 at 09:11 PM.
Zen is offline  
Old 08-29-2014, 06:58 AM   #3
Orc
Certified Mother’s Boy
 
Orc's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 5,165
Battle Record: 5-1

Accomplishments
- Hall of Fame

Champed
- NBL Season 4
- GBL Season 1
- Lyric Olympics
- Fight Night LXVI
- Fight Night LX
- Fight Night (3x)
- NBL Picture Roast
- Netcees Battle League (8x)
- NBL Picture League
- Gimmick Battle League
- BA Tag Team
- 1-2 Punch League
- NBL Cypher (3x)
- Battle Arena League
- OM HOF (2x)

Rep Power: 85899390
Orc has a reputation beyond reputeOrc has a reputation beyond reputeOrc has a reputation beyond reputeOrc has a reputation beyond reputeOrc has a reputation beyond reputeOrc has a reputation beyond reputeOrc has a reputation beyond reputeOrc has a reputation beyond reputeOrc has a reputation beyond reputeOrc has a reputation beyond reputeOrc has a reputation beyond repute
Default

for better or worse.


four words dripping of relationships masked-
a memento of wasting a past with those too flagrant to pass
you & him. naked in Prague.
memories surface: a tomb encased in a glass
honeymoons spent sunbathing in grass, rum tasting & laughs
the pyres burning, fever pitch: evil bitch
no iron curtain, wounds ripped open and didn't leave a stitch
i'll probably drown- head swimming with ideas not logically sound
windows fogged, welcome to apologies town
cheating to cheat on a cheater isn't an anomaly now
Orc is offline  
Old 08-29-2014, 07:17 AM   #4
sral
Shrewd as evearthed
 
sral's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Wolverhampton, England
Posts: 8,230
Battle Record: 28-3


Champed
- Gimmick Battle League
- The Winter Topical
- Topical Martyrs
- Lime Green Poetry Association
- Lyric Olympics
- Art of Writing League
- Guerrilla Writing League (2x)
- Black August II

Rep Power: 85899391
sral has a reputation beyond reputesral has a reputation beyond reputesral has a reputation beyond reputesral has a reputation beyond reputesral has a reputation beyond reputesral has a reputation beyond reputesral has a reputation beyond reputesral has a reputation beyond reputesral has a reputation beyond reputesral has a reputation beyond reputesral has a reputation beyond repute
Default

I've got Orc winning this, Zen's verse seemed to be a no-show keyed up quickly IMHO - it had a little of his usual flare, but nothing anywhere near what I know him to be capable of. Orc's seemed like he put his down with the quickness too, but it still had more substance to it than Zen's even if it could have used a little more forethought behind some of the lines (apologies town etc IMHO)

Vote - Orc
__________________
- Netcees Rebuttal Tourney
- Art of Writing League (x 4)
- AOWL Season 11 Champion (Undefeated Season)
sral is offline  
Old 08-29-2014, 12:09 PM   #5
MKG
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 481
Battle Record: 2-2



Rep Power: 0
MKG MKG MKG MKG MKG MKG MKG MKG MKG MKG MKG
Default

Zens was cool little quick piece which was smooth with some flow. However that also kinda hurt you because since you didn't really write much you really didn't sa much either.. Orc your verse was cool some nice flow and multie well I really enjoyed your closing line thought it was really well worded and strong. Overall I enjoyed Zens piece but I felt Orc had more material and the overall better piece. Good job to both
MKG is offline  
Old 08-29-2014, 12:16 PM   #6
Pinot Grij
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 863
Battle Record: 23-19

Accomplishments
- OM HOF

Champed
- Fight Night 2
- Write Week V
- Netcees Battle League (2x)
- Winter Topical II
- 1-2 Punch league

Rep Power: 29195060
Pinot Grij has a brilliant futurePinot Grij has a brilliant futurePinot Grij has a brilliant futurePinot Grij has a brilliant futurePinot Grij has a brilliant futurePinot Grij has a brilliant futurePinot Grij has a brilliant futurePinot Grij has a brilliant futurePinot Grij has a brilliant futurePinot Grij has a brilliant futurePinot Grij has a brilliant future
Default

Orc's verse featured a level of sophistication that Zen didn't really bring. It did feel like a no-show drop which is unfortunate because everyone knew there were reserves waiting. Orc's verse was deft, I really enjoyed it and it could've taken out a bunch of verses I've read so far. Nice stuff.

Vote for Orc
__________________
Topical C.R.E.A.M.
Pinot Grij is offline  
Old 08-29-2014, 12:17 PM   #7
jilti
neckties
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 1,629
Battle Record: 43-19


Champed
- BA Cypher
- 1-2 Punch League

Rep Power: 20816224
jilti has a brilliant futurejilti has a brilliant futurejilti has a brilliant futurejilti has a brilliant futurejilti has a brilliant futurejilti has a brilliant futurejilti has a brilliant futurejilti has a brilliant futurejilti has a brilliant futurejilti has a brilliant futurejilti has a brilliant future
Default

Zen had a very short piece but liked the fluidity of it. Orcs piece flowed smoothly and was easy to read/understand. liked the first half of his verse and the closing line. Good drop by both

V-Orc
jilti is offline  
Old 08-29-2014, 01:36 PM   #8
CopyPat
Mic Check
 
CopyPat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Calgary Alberta Canada
Posts: 707
Battle Record: 13-10



Rep Power: 3742221
CopyPat has a brilliant futureCopyPat has a brilliant futureCopyPat has a brilliant futureCopyPat has a brilliant futureCopyPat has a brilliant futureCopyPat has a brilliant futureCopyPat has a brilliant futureCopyPat has a brilliant futureCopyPat has a brilliant futureCopyPat has a brilliant futureCopyPat has a brilliant future
Send a message via AIM to CopyPat
Default

when i first read zens i was like "Sick" great flow sick schemes. paranoid. yeah. then i read orc and he just crammed SO much more in his 10 lines. he matched zen flow wise which i didnt think would happen after reading his, and also just did more with the topic. took it a step further and was a bit less predictable with the story. also ending was dope about cheating and tying that into paranoid. good job both. but orc took this cause he just did more with it. zen was good but you coulda definitely made your lines longer and did a bit more with it

v-Orc
__________________
My syllable count approximately a billion, bounce. You cannot compete.
CopyPat is offline  
Closed Thread

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 12:17 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.5
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
User Alert System provided by Advanced User Tagging (Lite) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2024 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.
Google+