08-14-2019, 03:55 AM | #1 |
White Earl
|
@lars. This must be it. Its older. David llama era shit.
unfortunately, there's more to me than what i express
if i could put it in words, you would think im summoning death if i sum it up in a breath, i'd suffocate fore im through imagine the hatred in me, while i contain it for you !!!!! can't hang with the truth, but i can blend with the lies if your word is your bond, why is it bending it with mine instead of defying, try to comprehend while i'm here i found my dream girl, and i wish she never appeared the devil is near, these problems run deeper than love just scratching the surface, everything beneath it is mud so i'm lethal with drugs, heartbreak -depression n rage my true love was alcohol, especially when were engaged i'm never afraid, to talk about the thoughts in my head but then again, if i talked you'd prolly all get upset cause and effect, so if realities a step i cant take drunk then alcoholics are fucced, why the hell cant they run ..? pride and paranoia, the pair that has imprisoned my soul praying for sanity, prepared to find a different approach i live in this globe, apparently designed by my demons so this air that i breath, is just another sign of my weakness I'm trying to beat this, repetitious pattern i weave my original sins, the self inflicted habits of greed i subsequently have to proceed, past the point of return I'm to clean, to relapse against my poisonous germs the voice of concern, is all the hell i hear when you speak call me possessed when ..the only evil in this mirror is me but appearance deceives, intervenes when the truth is defined and the lies, are what produces lines between you and I I used to try, and always wanted what i hated to be my love is my life, why did you have to take it from me...? the lonely life, searchin but I can't find companionship or maybe just, i don't understand what a companion is so answer this, why don't you even care my hearts hurt? not perfect yourself, but i never share those harsh words another sharp swerve and wrong turn, my vision is tunnel sure.. your a sexy beast mah, but i don't live in the jungle more innocent -humble, u take advantage of all the above layed myself on the line, just for you to walk on like a rug until lightning struck, i was to blind to see your true side in-between trust n love, is apparently where the truth lies two confused minds, ones older -and I'm tired of pain but if i go to sleep now, i just might die where I'm laying privately praying, but god's probably enjoying the show i did the devils work once, didn't think he would torture me tho i look at less fortunate folks, and i still feel no compassion even though i have a heart, it bleeds through open gashes been working hard to reach goals, won't buckle from stress but I was sent here for the struggle, and I'll suffer to death my concepts stay focused, waiting for something to change my progression remains hopeless, afraid I'm stuck in my ways I need a new trade ..just an idea that my company raised problem with that, addiction is my only companies traits I must be insane, the voice within my heads getting louder tellin me do drugs n be a failure, but I'm failing without'em counting the days going by, I'm twenty eight years deep if you live and you learn, guess you graduate when deceased i just aggravated the beast, annoying the women i love my gene pools liquor n drugs, but cant swim when I'm drunk and if that isn't enough, im drowning and hardly afloat know what its like to die, the lord pardoned me though a god awful approach, thats why i asked him for help but walk around like christ, no sense in asking myself I'm still bumping my head, and all i wanna do is react but can't climb the wall, i built when my ruins collapsed I produce an unusual laugh, everytime i notice a new brick maybe i miss the misery, and can't cope with improvement supposed to be human, but I won't accept imperfections never settle for less, yet my rep is less than impressive sexual preference, searching for an earth to hold hands with though the sex is intense, when she isn't worth my romantic romance is.. well -I'm just flirting with death and disease almost definitely, aroused by percocets like a sexual tease can't regret being clean, but doubt the demon's absenteeism humor the dead me n laugh, sort of found a happy medium hate the path its leading in, its almost like I'm ready to use but don't ever judge me, unless you've walked in 70 shoes when i get in the mood, maybe I'll change these concepts for now.. hip hop has saved me, i can't explain the logik.. i know your looking for change, but the pains what i have to feel if my world turns around, then somebody else grabbed the wheel brake pads that squeal, make it harder for me to stop movement love u hate u -fuck u trade u, I mite be lots of things -but not stupid this is hip hop music, I write the real and I'll never stray from that whats my life like?... nigga, if u had a clue you'd be afraid to ask can't explain my past, then again -who the hell ever said lifes fair? guess I'm just living my dreams out, to bad they were nightmares ....i don't know how much longer i can pretend like this.
__________________
-A.bove T.he R.est |
Thread Tools | |
Display Modes | |
|
|