01-20-2019, 08:50 PM | #1 |
yeet
Join Date: Mar 1993
Posts: 3,956
Battle Record: 20-34
Champed - 1-2 Punch League
Rep Power: 17624432 |
Zelph vs Incredible - ZELPH WINS
SOL Season 1 Wk 1 Due Thursday, Jan 24th Minimum - 10 lines Max - 16 lines Line limit can increase if both agree 24hr ext to be granted by opponent NO biting NO swaying NO feeding You MUST check in Don't edit after your opponent has posted 2nd person to post can't edit after the first vote comes in Don't be an idiot Don't use your opponent's pic unless it's a pic battle Agree on a line limit May God have mercy on your souls @wear shh @Incredible |
01-20-2019, 09:00 PM | #2 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 690
Battle Record: 3-3
Rep Power: 4173628 |
10-12 lines like the mag said I’d do
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01-23-2019, 05:13 AM | #3 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 690
Battle Record: 3-3
Rep Power: 4173628 |
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01-24-2019, 08:42 PM | #5 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 690
Battle Record: 3-3
Rep Power: 4173628 |
MOD WARS
Time to settle an old score. Type of shit u’ll get exposed for Face it, u cnt compete with the Monsters Inc.. ur just a lil bitch behind closed doors I own the streets + u aint as cold as me. Teach u a lesson - watch how I fold a G The stick’ll put a hole thru ur lid & leave rounds at the bottom like a boba tea Told the judge ur a bad dad. Now I stretch ur wifey out wen I tap that BIG FACTS.. Mr. Incredible couldn’t keep a grip on his son like Jack-Jack! U’ll always flop. Workin a $15 construction job & u think ur makin guap? STOP.. wen I lift a beam over ur head u won’t live to collect the workers comp. U tried to claw back for your son.. but when my paws grip - it's frightening cuz wen the Scar roars its leaving a cub with a fallen father like The Lion King |
01-24-2019, 08:49 PM | #6 | ||
HE / HIM / FRAC
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: PA
Posts: 11,592
Battle Record: 56-21
Accomplishments - 50+ Wins
Champed - The Ultimate Writer
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Rep Power: 12601535 |
Incredible's Verse
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It's like when u meet a chick for the first time prayin she doesn't squeal U wouldn't throw hands without a badge got no balls for dem skinny jeans Only thing squeezin around u is my finger &&& u callin "I need backup plz!!" This monster face loves when it's autumn, yeah Halloween time!! People comparin make up n' he goes as is "hey guys what u think about mine?" Them weird videos, deformed face, etc etc u ain't from a good home So I got that strap ready on the shoulder & I'm no skate boarder w/ a broken bone My squads loyal, don't talk to cops, never here us thru their speakers Guess God IS just one of us, he decided not to give this cop any lip either |
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01-24-2019, 09:15 PM | #7 |
GOAT
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 4,825
Battle Record: 14-17
Champed - Site Diss Competition
- Tag Tournament III
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Rep Power: 0 |
Wear Shhh
Time to settle an old score. Type of shit u’ll get exposed for Face it, u cnt compete with the Monsters Inc.. ur just a lil bitch behind closed doors this was an ok opener. cant compete with Monsters Inc made it seem like a Gimmick verse I own the streets + u aint as cold as me. Teach u a lesson - watch how I fold a G The stick’ll put a hole thru ur lid & leave rounds at the bottom like a boba tea soon as I saw the word stick I was like here we go again lol. You niggas will use sticks to no end. The rest of the bar is actually good but 2-3 years ago good Told the judge ur a bad dad. Now I stretch ur wifey out wen I tap that BIG FACTS.. Mr. Incredible couldn’t keep a grip on his son like Jack-Jack! I remember a member on this site didnt have custody of his kids if its him its a good personal. Bar could've been stronger but im not complaining U’ll always flop. Workin a $15 construction job & u think ur makin guap? STOP.. wen I lift a beam over ur head u won’t live to collect the workers comp. LOOOOL i actually lol'ed. Wont be alive to collect workers comp hehehehe U tried to claw back for your son.. but when my paws grip - it's frightening cuz wen the Scar roars its leaving a cub with a fallen father like The Lion King this was terrible because of how bad you tried to make it work lol. the Scar roars uh oh we all dont know its a lion king reference Good verse. Thanks for using humor Incredible: Plz explain why u got banned fgt, figures u duck on the reveal It's like when u meet a chick for the first time prayin she doesn't squeal i dont get this and im afraid there's not enough to it for me to investigate U wouldn't throw hands without a badge got no balls for dem skinny jeans Only thing squeezin around u is my finger &&& u callin "I need backup plz!!" okay this could've been decent if it didnt come off initially as extremely gay. You shouldnt say no balls for skinny jeans then immediately follow with only thing squeezing around you is my finger This monster face loves when it's autumn, yeah Halloween time!! People comparin make up n' he goes as is "hey guys what u think about mine?" lolol I lol'ed at this bc of how incredible stupid it was Them weird videos, deformed face, etc etc u ain't from a good home So I got that strap ready on the shoulder & I'm no skate boarder w/ a broken bone this was just terrible all around. no tie-ins. the I'm no skater drew no immediate comparisons. Worst bar structurally I've read in a minute My squads loyal, don't talk to cops, never here us thru their speakers Guess God IS just one of us, he decided not to give this cop any lip either I like the harshness that was attempted it just didn't come together Glad you both showed but this easily goes to Zelph. Keep battling guys loving it.
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Too Rich IRL to Be Here. I'm Out.
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01-24-2019, 11:16 PM | #8 | ||
DMS—Diddled My Stick
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 1,104
Rep Power: 0 |
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01-25-2019, 04:02 AM | #9 |
Upset Champion
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: West Mids
Posts: 3,861
Battle Record: 57-49
Accomplishments - 50 Wins
Champed - BA Rookie Tourney
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Rep Power: 24894578 |
This was a white wash in my opinion but happy to give constructive feedback @Incredible if my opinion is of interest
Plz explain why u got banned fgt, figures u duck on the reveal It's like when u meet a chick for the first time prayin she doesn't squeal I'm totally lost by this bar. Arguably I like making a bitch do that. That means she enjoyed the two in the pink one in the stink Anyway this bar had no wordplay that I can see. No metaphor or idiom or double meaning. It's not insulting even as a statement. I'm not entirely sure what this is. A personal reference at best but not even a good angle an if it was you did little with it. U wouldn't throw hands without a badge got no balls for dem skinny jeans Only thing squeezin around u is my finger &&& u callin "I need backup plz!!" ok I get this one. Set up is he's skinny an hasn't got balls. Punch is cus your so skinny my finger could choke you out and instead of fight the good fight your a balless peice of lippy trash an would ring your boys in blue. I also get the squeezing word was specifically chosen to follow on from set up However.. it is just weak. It's not very insulting. The imagery is almost cartoonist in its execution. It's better then the opener but it's still very weak This monster face loves when it's autumn, yeah Halloween time!! People comparin make up n' he goes as is "hey guys what u think about mine?" he goes as is... That was just sloppy. An given the set up which was at least a ok angle you really dampened anything you might have had with a very statemenish way of saying he is ugly without make up? Presume that was the idea here Them weird videos, deformed face, etc etc u ain't from a good home So I got that strap ready on the shoulder & I'm no skate boarder w/ a broken bone I'm starting to regret doing a break down. I don't see how the punch ties into the set up at all. My squads loyal, don't talk to cops, never here us thru their speakers Guess God IS just one of us, he decided not to give this cop any lip either praise be to Jesus. This was an actual bar. Don't get me wrong even 5 of these would of lost to zelph who came very consistent I thought in this battle, but this is the bar you should use as a template for future writing. Set up and punch tie in. The execution is good as I didn't see where your going with it until that last half of the second line and then punch baby. Yes. Do more of these. [/QUOTE] As for Zelph, consistent showing an a white wash win. Bob's tea was my least favourite by a mile. Opener was a solid nameplay. The Mr incredibe line was a funny personal with nameplay ties in. Very good. Closer was definitely LOTB. And finally - I liked the theme of kids movies as an added personal to your target. That was subtle and nice. Vote Z |
01-25-2019, 04:28 PM | #10 | ||
Retired
Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 646
Battle Record: 12-10
Rep Power: 1601590 |
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01-25-2019, 04:39 PM | #11 |
Satan
Join Date: Dec 2018
Posts: 2,156
Battle Record: 4-25
Rep Power: 8129212 |
Wear Shh..
- Time to settle an old score. Type of shit u’ll get exposed for Face it, u cnt compete with the Monsters Inc.. ur just a lil bitch behind closed doors I haven't seen a punch this dope in a while..so props for that. Niice overall..cool bar.. I own the streets + u aint as cold as me. Teach u a lesson - watch how I fold a G The stick’ll put a hole thru ur lid & leave rounds at the bottom like a boba tea This is another dope bar..pretty dope man..niice.. Told the judge ur a bad dad. Now I stretch ur wifey out wen I tap that BIG FACTS.. Mr. Incredible couldn’t keep a grip on his son like Jack-Jack! This was okay..it was felt..but could be better.. U’ll always flop. Workin a $15 construction job & u think ur makin guap? STOP.. wen I lift a beam over ur head u won’t live to collect the workers comp. Lmao@ this bar..it was niice..good one.. U tried to claw back for your son.. but when my paws grip - it's frightening cuz wen the Scar roars its leaving a cub with a fallen father like The Lion King Nice one here..niice closer..cool bar.. Sharp - Plz explain why u got banned fgt, figures u duck on the reveal It's like when u meet a chick for the first time prayin she doesn't squeal This was decent..I suppose..needs to be better in ways..but okay.. U wouldn't throw hands without a badge got no balls for dem skinny jeans Only thing squeezin around u is my finger &&& u callin "I need backup plz!!" This was funny..but needs to better in ways..but okay.. This monster face loves when it's autumn, yeah Halloween time!! People comparin make up n' he goes as is "hey guys what u think about mine?" lol..this was okay as-well..decent I suppose.. Them weird videos, deformed face, etc etc u ain't from a good home So I got that strap ready on the shoulder & I'm no skate boarder w/ a broken bone This was okay..niice one.. My squads loyal, don't talk to cops, never here us thru their speakers Guess God IS just one of us, he decided not to give this cop any lip either lmao @ this bar..was okay..niice one..your best bar..decent closer.. overall - decent battle here..but Wear Shh kind of overwhelmed Sharp with his verse. More better hits, and more efficiency..niice one guys..but I have to go with.. V/ Wear Shhh |
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