THE ROAST OF ULLR AKA BARON X OF RAP ROYALTY

[Xquisite]

Originally Posted by uh-oh

THIS NIGGA LOOK LIKE HE REALLY GOOD AT TEXT BATTLES

dead

[Batty]

Face looking like a Norman Rockwell painting of Santa Claus and shit.

Looking like he's dressed up for funeral buffet for the second in command at a computedr repair shop in Jersey.

Lookin weaker than kitten poots in bubble bath water... Lookin like he can't punch his way out of a daydream.

Lookin like he was born with an uncle face condition.

[Vulgar]

Racoon dick bone flute cracked me up @Batty

Looking like a Branch Davidian soup cook.

Looking like a crouch snorkeler from the Netherlands.

Looking like a Kubrick screenplay got crossbreeded with grasshopper nostril hairs and Dutch fabric softener.

Looking like an accountant from the Die Hard franchise.

Looking like a pseudointellectual hare rabbit-punched its way into the human genome.

Looking like you patented flak jackets, porpoise sunscreen, and the movie Inner Space.

Looking like a narrator for the seven-part National Geographic series "The Crestfallen Panthers of Istanbul Park"

Looking like a Finnish grenadier had the body of a cuticle scissors salesman.

Looking like he answers every question by saying "Posh. Too posh, Mr. Trum."

[~RustyGunZ~]

Many reps to batty and Vulgar when I get to a cpu

Lookin like he cross breeds forest animals in old oil barrels

Lookin like he can't sleep without the fable 2 soundtrack looping on his stereo

Also can't sleep before reciting the recipe for Manga degeneration potion

Sacrificed his half sister on behalf of his clan

[Vulgar]

Looking like he ate Amelia Earhart's actual heart.

Looking like a janitor at the Norwegian Beekeeper's Association retreat.

Looking like he doesn't know his p's and q's even though his scientific journal is peer-reviewed.

Looking like his name is Archibald Systems.

Looking like a serial komodo dragon molester.

Looking like he clearly needs a hand carrying buckets of orangutan piss to his hidden vault in the Andes.

Looking like a Bond villain named Humdrum Panopticon.

[Vulgar]

Looking like a philandering artificial intelligence expert.

Looking like Steven Spielberg's worst assistant ever.

Looking like Peppermint Patty's ex-boyfriend.

Dude looks like he wears chloroform for cologne and calls his apartment his "Space Balls pad".

Looking like an extra for Robin Hood: Men in Tights suffering from quantum computing mid-life crisis. I don't know what that is either, but he has it.

Looking like the physical manifestation of a sand worm from Dune merging with a scrawny tiger's sperm cell.

Looking like a stunt man from Cowboy Sheetrock.

Looking like the guy who wants to give everyone handshakes at the squeegee factory.

[Vulgar]

Originally Posted by Batty

Lookin like Elf on a Shelf as a Century 21 agent.

dead

[Chyeahhh!!!]

Captain save a Bookworm

Dances With Wolves extra

despises the term "Peacoat" but much rather it be referred to as a coat of peas

first in his dungeons and dragons group to recommend the laminating of the cards

only eats the butts of bread

was bestowed the highest honor in his cubscouts group which is the "Ned Flanders badge"

has his World of Warcraft clan tag tattooed on his back

[Vulgar]

Originally Posted by Chyeahhh Guevara

despises the term "Peacoat" but much rather it be referred to as a coat of peas

lmao

Looking like he can reconstruct DNA sequences using a ball of yarn and panda bear semen.

[~RustyGunZ~]

Lookin like he starred in his local theatres last piece as depression

Lookin like he sells bagged lunches outside of schools for "extremely competitive prices"

Lookin like the only member of a woodland neighborhood watch

Lookin like he ran for mayor of pancakes hometown under the false identity Gareth Dunlop, promising he'd raise the yield of cornmeal for years to come and that pistachio shells would play a major role

Mixes zoo animal cries on the tape recorder from 50 cents childhood in get rich or die trying to sooth his rape victims

Lookin like the geico cavemen had a butt baby that grew up to be a faggot

[Chyeahhh!!!]

stop taking "rape face" selfies

looking like you splash yourself with Brute and go out chess clubbing

[~RustyGunZ~]

Lookin like he writes true blood fanfiction that disassociates vampires and focuses solely on sooki steaming craw fish

All wool everything

Novice bowling pin collector on an unpaid internship

Lookin like he combs his hair and beard with a wishbone he found in a canned chicken

Lookin like he host tournaments for Flaccid the Gathering on weeknights

[sral]

lmao this nigga PjewK post-that loss to Diz

[Bodey]

probly smells as if he gets regularly buttfucked by garbage trucks

[El Muffin]

Originally Posted by Knucklehead

Lookin like he writes true blood fanfiction that disassociates vampires and focuses solely on sooki steaming craw fish

All wool everything

Novice bowling pin collector on an unpaid internship

Lookin like he combs his hair and beard with a wishbone he found in a canned chicken

Lookin like he host tournaments for Flaccid the Gathering on weeknights

lord my soul dnt take It too early

[El Muffin]

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=5vKevEVHEiI

Jesus tge production on this opening track

Jesus


Mario 64 legend of 7 stars ...clouds

[Split Eight]

Originally Posted by Ullr

Well that defeats the whole purpose of my being here and battling here - if I had wanted to announce who I was in the first place I would have done it. I only registered on this site because I wanted to try being something else - I am naturally kind and helpful and in terms of battling that limits me greatly. I wanted to play a character and not be so coddling and this bullshit absolutely slaughters that. All I wanted was a venue to improve because you know what? You guys are absolutely right, my battling is still trash tier and I am sorry for wanting to change that through battling in a new style. Rap-Royalty is the best site on the internet and the competition there is fantastic but I wanted to try a new style IN PEACE without having shit like this. What the fuck can be said about a site with an Administrator who would blow up a PM conversation like this? Seriously. I don't really care but seriously, no decorum, no respect whatsoever. Really sad.

The thing about this site is nobody cares about who you are elsewhere, what you have done elsewhere, and honestly no one knows enough to care in the first place. Those that frequent other places and come here figure out that mentality too

This thread is literally "time for jokes on the new guy" not an attack on what you wanna do in terms of writig. People here respect the craft but keep work and play separate

The discussion forum is its own beast, I really wouldn't judge the sites worth by discussion alone. The topical league (run by Certain, not Knuck), the Open Mic (run by me, not Knuck), and the Battle League (run by Sharp and Allen, not Knuck) are all active and seeing improvements all the time


That said. I will be back to roast you in a few

[veritas]

This ginge wigster got the nose of a 60 year alcoholic.


Looking like seth green had a gay love baby with Dustin diamond

THIS lame looking straight like the problem child grew up and got his picture taken in the middle of an operation to turn him into a "flippant mole cricket".

dude's face looking like it wants to expand straight off of his skull.

duke has the look of having an easter bunny porn fetish.

[Geno]

Lol. Baron fell victim? Say it aint so

[Batty]

Lookin like he can't sleep without the fable 2 soundtrack looping on his stereo

deadddddd.