Sermon on the dark knight (Batman)

UnbornBuddha · 07-28-2014, 05:14 PM

Batman and Robin what a curious two.
Vigilant crusaders against nefarious fools
who joke & riddle with others' lives in search of truth.
Is the protagonist a virtue of proof?
Or a product of staring too attentively at his parents tomb
Until outcomes Bruce, the real identity of the costumed sleuth.
Whose obsessed with the memoirs in his album book
That reflected his past and youth.
Memories that seem as immortal as Ra's Al Ghoul,
whose legacy spans as mythical as Vamps and Ghouls.
But the immortal's heart broods because the hard truth
is the grim reaper is a forever hunter.
The Lazarus pit is a poor excuse one conjures for an answer.
Yet Talia insists to her beloved to join their ranks and live
a life focused on starting the apocalypse, so to alter the populace.
Eugenists depicted in comic strips prove that drunks of madness exist.
& the only release for such intoxicated shift in consciousness is amethyst.
A stone oculists and holistic ophthalmologists utilize for phantasms which
contribute to the maniac's mischief,
with quests as sadistic as what Brainiac seeking.
And so the legendary dark knight emerges in view,
Deciphering murder clues & becoming immune to poisonous fumes,
but also sullenly to joyous views that in Gotham is an unknown pursuit.
Ra's Al Ghoul plan is stopped, and everything returns to normal soon
because the soaring hero is burning to stop the servants and brutes
of Lucifer's group who worship monsoons.
But a curse accrues when the knight tries to balance the world.
A challenge unfurls that threatens to turn the planet to sorrow.
Villains so crude since childhood they absorbed the horrors
Of the universe that made them turn so morally twisted///
The way they killed their victims will make your eyes curl, child murderers.
The caped martyr faces his greatest threat,
and he barely manages to escape his death.
Believing he perished even two face prays for him.
F.Y.I. his grapple gun is not used for assaulting thugs.
But to hang by a thread when jumping off.
Things tend to happen when one's side job
is beating goons until blood and puke
makes them spills the beans, what they knew
Plus a busted tooth.
The superhero vigilante has only loved a few,
and some of them departed through when hardship bloomed.
Jason Todd is sleeping, after the clown carved his wisdom
Onto his prisoner, and then the bomb started ticking.
But the knight arrived just when the zero mark was hitting.
And now Nightwing faces Robin's demons.
The poor mourning Wayne blames his sluggish Batmobile,
The alluring loony that is Joker won't stop his laughs until
killing all the little children trapped and sealed in the plot the madman build.
An injured billionaire heals under Alfred's meals, who offers willingly
a mantra of hope against the fear that even god then kneels.
But Bruce only hears what he wants to hear, over the years pain has numbed his ears.
Recovered he wards off the madman's guild
Putting them back into the asylum doped up on doctors pills.
Ironically it is Wayne that pays his foes doctor bills.
So in a way he keeps them alive and insane so thy
fun never wanes, and so he can save the lives
of those saying "oh save me my savior knight".
If only someone can tame his fire & sway his mind
to grace the light and begin an unscathed tryst
Between Bane and thine. Someone should save his life.
But that requires someone to contain his vice,
And pay the price for changing time.

dead man · 07-28-2014, 05:27 PM

@zygote

DexLabb · 07-28-2014, 08:56 PM

all i can imagine is my grandmother writing a PG rated story that happened to rhyme sometimes. like when u said "curious two" thats exactly what my grandma would say .. or like its almost as if ur at a fire surrounded by little kids and they want u to tell them a story.. super gay

Adverse · 07-28-2014, 11:53 PM

Idk.
Like the rhyme schemes and vocabulary were on point, but I just couldn't keep up with it, it was kind of scattered and I was just like 'how the fuck does he get all of this out of Batman?' lol i mean it was a cool read none the less though.

"The poor mourning Wayne blames his sluggish Batmobile,
The alluring loony that is Joker won't stop his laughs until
killing all the little children trapped and sealed in the plot the madman build.
An injured billionaire heals under Alfred's meals, who offers willingly
a mantra of hope against the fear that even god then kneels."

Liked that piece right there.

Zen · 07-29-2014, 04:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dead man

@zygote

I really hope this isn't zygote.

UnbornBuddha · 07-29-2014, 08:16 PM

Thank you for the feedback Adverse. Perhaps it is a bit scattered, but amicably a lot of this are subtle themes extrapolated from the the Batman universe. Others are simply a treatise exploring the psycho-sclerotic factors at play within certain character's lives, which have a trickle of concatenated ripples that affect the rest of the caricatures, kind of like an interwoven web. A sort of rabbit hole or vacuum where everyone's actions, especially Bruce's creates and affects the rest of the flock like a domino effect, even his worst adversaries. But because I had to explain it, this means I didn't make it clear enough, and failed in conveying/ transmitting it. Anyways thank you again!

UnbornBuddha · 07-29-2014, 08:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zen

I really hope this isn't zygote.

I assure you it isn't.

JESODIST · 07-31-2014, 08:04 PM

That's a very poetic way to Capture the movie's essence in a lyrical way. Very inspiring throughout the whole piece and you did sway a little on the topic on some parts which makes it a more complex piece. Your rhyme skills are past unique.

Pharaohs Army · 08-03-2014, 02:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by UnbornBuddha

...Batmobile,
The alluring loony that is Joker won't stop his laughs until
killing all the little children trapped and sealed in the plot the madman build...

what i've come to expect from the buddha^

i enjoyed this sermon. well done & flowed nice. it's hard for me to critique you because what i "like" and "am able to execute" is sometimes different from what is "good or not so good" for your standards.

Eŋg · 08-05-2014, 03:54 PM

the economy of language really does invoke zygote and his mechanical algorithm when he'd write. no bad thing. just naturally asks the question of whether or not you have a soul. i jest. the allusion of the intoxicated shift/amethyst line was clever. examining the morality of a fictional universe's anti-hero and the surrounding cast of characters in the play is a novel idea. also a reimagined narrative. not reimagined, more like rehashed. i thought, at times, you were going to delve into speaking more on WE, using the object of a sermon as a crooked mirror or skewered looking glass to consider ourselves. ultimately, i don't think you did that. i don't know why you wrote this. it was insipid, if i'm honest. but if i can't personally see the point in it, i understand that doesn't mean it's without merit. similar to the amethyst line i mentioned previously, i enjoyed parts of this, but on the whole, it was bland and unappetizing. perhaps i've missed a greater insight or design of the sermon. or not. you can write, i just wasn't feeling this.

07-28-2014, 05:14 PM	#1
UnbornBuddha Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2014 Posts: 1,008 Battle Record: 23-10 Champed - Art of Writing League - AOWL Season 5 Rep Power: 23856376	Sermon on the dark knight (Batman) Batman and Robin what a curious two. Vigilant crusaders against nefarious fools who joke & riddle with others' lives in search of truth. Is the protagonist a virtue of proof? Or a product of staring too attentively at his parents tomb Until outcomes Bruce, the real identity of the costumed sleuth. Whose obsessed with the memoirs in his album book That reflected his past and youth. Memories that seem as immortal as Ra's Al Ghoul, whose legacy spans as mythical as Vamps and Ghouls. But the immortal's heart broods because the hard truth is the grim reaper is a forever hunter. The Lazarus pit is a poor excuse one conjures for an answer. Yet Talia insists to her beloved to join their ranks and live a life focused on starting the apocalypse, so to alter the populace. Eugenists depicted in comic strips prove that drunks of madness exist. & the only release for such intoxicated shift in consciousness is amethyst. A stone oculists and holistic ophthalmologists utilize for phantasms which contribute to the maniac's mischief, with quests as sadistic as what Brainiac seeking. And so the legendary dark knight emerges in view, Deciphering murder clues & becoming immune to poisonous fumes, but also sullenly to joyous views that in Gotham is an unknown pursuit. Ra's Al Ghoul plan is stopped, and everything returns to normal soon because the soaring hero is burning to stop the servants and brutes of Lucifer's group who worship monsoons. But a curse accrues when the knight tries to balance the world. A challenge unfurls that threatens to turn the planet to sorrow. Villains so crude since childhood they absorbed the horrors Of the universe that made them turn so morally twisted/// The way they killed their victims will make your eyes curl, child murderers. The caped martyr faces his greatest threat, and he barely manages to escape his death. Believing he perished even two face prays for him. F.Y.I. his grapple gun is not used for assaulting thugs. But to hang by a thread when jumping off. Things tend to happen when one's side job is beating goons until blood and puke makes them spills the beans, what they knew Plus a busted tooth. The superhero vigilante has only loved a few, and some of them departed through when hardship bloomed. Jason Todd is sleeping, after the clown carved his wisdom Onto his prisoner, and then the bomb started ticking. But the knight arrived just when the zero mark was hitting. And now Nightwing faces Robin's demons. The poor mourning Wayne blames his sluggish Batmobile, The alluring loony that is Joker won't stop his laughs until killing all the little children trapped and sealed in the plot the madman build. An injured billionaire heals under Alfred's meals, who offers willingly a mantra of hope against the fear that even god then kneels. But Bruce only hears what he wants to hear, over the years pain has numbed his ears. Recovered he wards off the madman's guild Putting them back into the asylum doped up on doctors pills. Ironically it is Wayne that pays his foes doctor bills. So in a way he keeps them alive and insane so thy fun never wanes, and so he can save the lives of those saying "oh save me my savior knight". If only someone can tame his fire & sway his mind to grace the light and begin an unscathed tryst Between Bane and thine. Someone should save his life. But that requires someone to contain his vice, And pay the price for changing time. Last edited by UnbornBuddha; 07-29-2014 at 12:38 AM.

07-28-2014, 05:27 PM	#2
dead man living Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 3,469 Battle Record: 33-18 Accomplishments - Hall of Fame Champed - AOWL Season 1 - Art of Writing League - AOWL Season 4 - Write Week V - GWL Season 1 Rep Power: 77606676	@zygote __________________ Zack Wicks for president

07-28-2014, 08:56 PM	#3
DexLabb song genius Join Date: Sep 2013 Posts: 377 Rep Power: 0	all i can imagine is my grandmother writing a PG rated story that happened to rhyme sometimes. like when u said "curious two" thats exactly what my grandma would say .. or like its almost as if ur at a fire surrounded by little kids and they want u to tell them a story.. super gay __________________ ZOOM IN ON THAT ASS LIKE BINOCULARS

07-29-2014, 08:16 PM	#6
UnbornBuddha Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2014 Posts: 1,008 Battle Record: 23-10 Champed - Art of Writing League - AOWL Season 5 Rep Power: 23856376	Thank you for the feedback Adverse. Perhaps it is a bit scattered, but amicably a lot of this are subtle themes extrapolated from the the Batman universe. Others are simply a treatise exploring the psycho-sclerotic factors at play within certain character's lives, which have a trickle of concatenated ripples that affect the rest of the caricatures, kind of like an interwoven web. A sort of rabbit hole or vacuum where everyone's actions, especially Bruce's creates and affects the rest of the flock like a domino effect, even his worst adversaries. But because I had to explain it, this means I didn't make it clear enough, and failed in conveying/ transmitting it. Anyways thank you again! Last edited by UnbornBuddha; 07-29-2014 at 08:20 PM.

07-31-2014, 08:04 PM	#8
JESODIST Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2014 Posts: 295 Battle Record: 3-3 Rep Power: 976836	That's a very poetic way to Capture the movie's essence in a lyrical way. Very inspiring throughout the whole piece and you did sway a little on the topic on some parts which makes it a more complex piece. Your rhyme skills are past unique. Last edited by JESODIST; 08-02-2014 at 04:57 PM.

07-28-2014, 11:53 PM	#4
Adverse low tide in serotonin bay Join Date: Jul 2013 Posts: 2,747 Battle Record: 37-28 Champed - GWL Picture Challenge - Guerrilla Writing League - Black August II Rep Power: 15446143	Idk. Like the rhyme schemes and vocabulary were on point, but I just couldn't keep up with it, it was kind of scattered and I was just like 'how the fuck does he get all of this out of Batman?' lol i mean it was a cool read none the less though. "The poor mourning Wayne blames his sluggish Batmobile, The alluring loony that is Joker won't stop his laughs until killing all the little children trapped and sealed in the plot the madman build. An injured billionaire heals under Alfred's meals, who offers willingly a mantra of hope against the fear that even god then kneels." Liked that piece right there.

08-05-2014, 03:54 PM	#10
Eŋg rhyme capsule. Join Date: Sep 2018 Posts: 2,146 Rep Power: 0	the economy of language really does invoke zygote and his mechanical algorithm when he'd write. no bad thing. just naturally asks the question of whether or not you have a soul. i jest. the allusion of the intoxicated shift/amethyst line was clever. examining the morality of a fictional universe's anti-hero and the surrounding cast of characters in the play is a novel idea. also a reimagined narrative. not reimagined, more like rehashed. i thought, at times, you were going to delve into speaking more on WE, using the object of a sermon as a crooked mirror or skewered looking glass to consider ourselves. ultimately, i don't think you did that. i don't know why you wrote this. it was insipid, if i'm honest. but if i can't personally see the point in it, i understand that doesn't mean it's without merit. similar to the amethyst line i mentioned previously, i enjoyed parts of this, but on the whole, it was bland and unappetizing. perhaps i've missed a greater insight or design of the sermon. or not. you can write, i just wasn't feeling this.