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05-04-2018, 02:50 PM
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#1 |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 1,709
Battle Record: 9-12
Rep Power: 4997617   |
Loads of baggage
Yea I know.... I come with loads of baggage But if truth be told I'm just a hopeless romantic Can't even remember a moment, I wasn't this totally damaged So now I just sit back, smoke, and try to cope with the madness I'm trying to grab ahold of ever emotion i've shattered Guess you can say I'm just one of those over emotional bastards Never been one to drink but lately I've been lonely and plastered Looking for something to console my lost and broken stature. Fuck... I don't even know if it matters, but i'm feeling so awfully alone Lately i just wander around, never felt so lost in a home Now that anxiety's gone, depressions taken it's place It's like Each seconds an hour and each hours a day I'm so sick of the pain... my god I just wanna live free! Why is the only time I feel alive when I sleep? Its like a disease, that is slowly eating me whole I've contemplated death but I'm not ready to go Life use to be perfect, i couldn't wait to come home Excited to share with you everything that I owned On our days off, how I'd lay with you lavishly... the way you would laugh with me.. It was like each day was a masterpiece. I tried to fight for us, i admit i prayed you'd come back to me prayed you'd come after me... But all I got was a blank face, a stanger conveying her apathy I guess that it's back to me just doing my thing Now we're each in different corners on opposite sides of a ring Fighting like we never meant a single thing to each other A broken dream, and loneliness, til' emotions recover. Drop some links, I'll return the feed as always... and nice to see you netcees, it's been a minute
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05-05-2018, 06:01 AM
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#2 | |
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 3,934
Battle Record: 3-3
Rep Power: 0   |
Quote:
Dope piece, emotion & scheme wise it stood out...content was nice, as a whole it was solid man... Stay upwards. |
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05-05-2018, 07:31 AM
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#3 |
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White Earl
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Philly Cat.
Posts: 12,354
Battle Record: 10-15
Accomplishments - Open Mic HOF (4x)
Champed - Netcees Writers League
- Write Week I
- Write Week 8
Rep Power: 50036761  |
Ya. This shit was crazy. GOOD TO SEE YOU BACK JW.
Dope drop. Flow and content were fire imo.
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-A.bove T.he R.est |
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05-05-2018, 03:26 PM
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#4 | |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2017
Posts: 783
Battle Record: 2-1
Champed - Art of Writing League
Rep Power: 19584278 |
Yeah
I dig it. Obviously the flow was the highlight here. It started out spotless and stayed that way from beginning to end. Not only that, but the wording was also very good. The plot of the content isn't really a new one. But you did well in holding my attention and keeping the story progressive. Good stuff JW. I'll be on the look out for your next drop.
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