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Old 02-02-2023, 11:07 PM   #5
Master Rock
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Cereal's opener is on point!!! The whole paragraph was dope but Cinderella twerking...Lol!!!.. I can't picture that for some reason. But the next paragraph seemed to falter for me. As for Sym, he started off with some nice rhyme patterns and shows his flow but hasn't captured me in his opening paragraph. and then kills the mood with his prose rhyme...ugh... after that moment he went back to the flow and incorporated musically ideas to the verse in the second paragraph.
EX:
"she also loved the animals that lived in the yard.
"”what kind?”
rabbits and birds, wild ones, and especially mice.
and her work ethic… ”her what?”… well, she worked hard."
Dope concept.
Sym also had visuals that captured visuals in my head. EX"she loved working out in the dirt, with the plants and the worms.
”ewwww…” she giggles and squirms"
Sym continues to paint a vivid picture along with a cadence that shows time well spend.

Cereal my man, I know you have potential to kill but against Sym you got to come with guns blazing...Giving it to Sym.
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