So oddly suitable

Johnny 6 feet · 06-18-2020, 05:19 PM

Sweet and sharp man. Lots of strong vocab and interesting imagery used here. You conveyed inner turmoil. The image I got was a guy muttering to himself in a dark room. Rhyme scheme was straightforward but appropriate for the tone of the piece. You should look into joining the GWL man. I see some great potential here.

Objective · 06-28-2020, 10:56 AM

Short and dope af. Got the message across with less is more at its core intertwined with good flow and rhymescheme. Heartfelt and honest. Good shit for sure.

06-28-2020, 10:56 AM	#2
Objective ( ͡º ͜ʖ ͡º) Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 3,868 Battle Record: 17-32 Rep Power: 52474192	Short and dope af. Got the message across with less is more at its core intertwined with good flow and rhymescheme. Heartfelt and honest. Good shit for sure. __________________ I'm not a slave for entertainment, I'm entertainments personal slave, So deep into writing I'm concerned bout the text on my grave. www.youtube.com/watch?v=gV8ozGcGJ6o

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06-18-2020, 05:19 PM	#1
Johnny 6 feet Storyteller Join Date: May 2020 Posts: 446 Battle Record: 8-4 Champed - Guerrilla Writing League Rep Power: 5558447	Sweet and sharp man. Lots of strong vocab and interesting imagery used here. You conveyed inner turmoil. The image I got was a guy muttering to himself in a dark room. Rhyme scheme was straightforward but appropriate for the tone of the piece. You should look into joining the GWL man. I see some great potential here.