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04-12-2016, 10:26 PM
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#5 |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 1,709
Battle Record: 9-12
Rep Power: 4997617   |
Really good battle here guys,
Timeless, I really enjoyed the cadence you brought into this piece, your first four lines just read super smooth to me. At first when reading your piece I thought it was gunna be about the woman going first from girlfriend or whatever and breaking up and becoming the worst enemy ect but I was happy with the outcome you had. I didn't understand the landscape changing so she settles in and rests with the sight line though. It just didn't make sense to me. Regardless though I enjoyed it. Buddha, This entertained me... and reminded me how much it sucks getting old lol. Nah but for real I enjoyed this verse, you took us down a path of a man who in his younger years is physically fit without a care in the world who eventually succumbs to the inevitable breakdown of one's body and you did it with pizazz, good job man. This could go either way, I really enjoyed the way timeless started his piece but I was more engaged by Buddha's overall piece so this week he edges it out. Sorry for the brevity of my vote, it's been a long day Mvgt=Buddha
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