Week 1: Jesodist vs. Razah (RAZAH WINS SHUTOUT 7-0)

[Mr. J]

JESODIST, nice to see you make an attempt at having a more focused piece.
at first glance I thought you were just writing a random piece circulating around your lyrical prowess
but reading it again I see a glimpse of reward, you come off more of an oddball to me, but not as odd as idk...2tripple0
regardless I find that your description of pain to be really worthwhile it doesnt rhyme as much as I hoped for but thats ok.
I mean if this were the poetry league I would have gave you 3.3/5...this is rough on me though.
What really troubled me was the redundancy of the sloth or tortoise reference, that threw me off.
I had to look up spiritism as well cause at first glance I was like wtf...but you snuck that by me
you came to the table ready to eat but forgot to bring the utensils you needed...nice work regardless

Razah, nice to see you round these parts again buddy hopefully you can stick around a little longer instead of signing out & easing your way into the playoffs....still got love for you though
your verse was on point, it had its moments where the flow felt like the foundation of your piece
and it really made the read feel quicker than the past few pieces that I have read...
your interpretation of the topic was really nice as well, not as flashy as your opponents but still great. nice work

v/Razah, I really enjoyed both pieces but I feel razah had a more cohesive verse.
although JESODIST had a more impact with his verse he didnt meet my standard of topicals
Razah shined with a more simple approach with a flow that came off natural as well as smooth.
I would have leaned towards JESODIST but a few points felt like it could have been touched up.
nice battle fellas. look forward to seeing more from you two