Week 3: UnbornBuddha 1-1 vs Mr. J 2-0 [Mr J 4-1]

Razah · 08-05-2015, 01:52 PM

Mr. J, I liked the twist you had on this. Pretty cool concept.

"My hands become sanity as it slips through our grasp"

"You make a life altering choice, redemption is God’s problem."

Those bars stood out to me. Flow was very smooth on this one, and like I said, I liked the concept you went with. Good shit.

Unborn Buddha...

"But, that assumption didn’t take account the puppeteer’s strings
-Shortly after, there was the disappearance of hundreds of kids."

That threw me off, with the whole not rhyming thing.

The overall story was pretty cool though. Also, the 4th 'verse' didn't end with a rhyme either. I dunno why that throws me off so much, *shrugs.

This is a tough battle to vote on. I feel like Buddha had the better story here, but Mr. J had a concept that I really liked more. Also, he had a few bars in there that really stood out to me. I feel like I say this week in & week out, but, the writers left in this league all can write a solid dope verse. So, it really comes down, to me, picking things I didn't like, and deciding which one I liked more overall. So, yeah, Im'a have to vote for:

vMr. J

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08-05-2015, 01:52 PM	#7
Razah rockkFresh Join Date: Apr 2015 Location: Chicago. Posts: 1,088 Battle Record: 8-10 Champed - Art of Writing League Rep Power: 11328545	Mr. J, I liked the twist you had on this. Pretty cool concept. "My hands become sanity as it slips through our grasp" "You make a life altering choice, redemption is God’s problem." Those bars stood out to me. Flow was very smooth on this one, and like I said, I liked the concept you went with. Good shit. Unborn Buddha... "But, that assumption didn’t take account the puppeteer’s strings -Shortly after, there was the disappearance of hundreds of kids." That threw me off, with the whole not rhyming thing. The overall story was pretty cool though. Also, the 4th 'verse' didn't end with a rhyme either. I dunno why that throws me off so much, *shrugs. This is a tough battle to vote on. I feel like Buddha had the better story here, but Mr. J had a concept that I really liked more. Also, he had a few bars in there that really stood out to me. I feel like I say this week in & week out, but, the writers left in this league all can write a solid dope verse. So, it really comes down, to me, picking things I didn't like, and deciding which one I liked more overall. So, yeah, Im'a have to vote for: vMr. J