Week 1: Objective vs. Just Write \\ Just Write wins 6-0

[Cereal_Killa]

Just Write:

Look.. i really, really needed this right now.. a jump from vulgar’s interstellar verse n King Ra’s cludeo chapters..

“No cable or a/c, mom paid the bills on main in stiletto's”

Something down to earth and straight forward as far as the movement of your story..
And real!

"i got sick of filet mignon
But when everything's great, you know that something is wrong"

Being aware of the warning bells of consumption’s is true..
And the fact you dropped it straight away, in one and a half line.. Was perfect.. You didn’t build up the hype, in a glamorous over powering way.. It was a traditional movement of life, the white picket fence story.. And very suited with the one n a half line – how quickly it turns.. Beautiful

"it was a tuesday, we had a big shipment coming in
Of high grade peruvian white, uncut. and some black tar heroin
I'd get nervous everytime, hand in my pocket on a cocked nine"

If read/roll this all the way through without the line breaks, its sensational.. Description cha ching..

"Back to Detention hall...."

They’re still kids, wtf :)

"And it was in prison i discoved religion and about becoming a Christian
Death Row."

NICE..

"I just sat there puzzled, while he muttered about sins being covered in blood
I closed my eyes and found freedom within my chains."

Wow, dude you captured a true story.. a person being setting free through emptying his rage, hate and anguish through someone else’s stories.. very nice indeed, very nice

Objective:

I love that jazz..

"I'm a rhythmic neanderthal"

As far as a random splurt of absolute insanity, cleansing your mind.. flipping through styles, of writing on a dime.. i do so like.. Chaotic, sporadic.. Complimenting JUST WRITES verse..

Clarifying the whole thing in the last stanza, pulling yourself together through the chains of judgement..

Respect..


VOTE = Just write

For his realism whilst telling a layered story, plus his deep description is what i friggen loved..

Good luck guys.. Thanks