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Old 01-18-2014, 07:39 PM   #9
Nigma
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: BC, Canada
Posts: 1,723
Battle Record: 28-20


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Trap. Enjoyed the elegant way you went about the story. Mechanics well executed and content was enjoyable but aside from the one metaphor used to begin and end the piece, you didnt allude to the picture much at all. I feel a few subtle references would have rounded the verse off in terms of voting criteria for this battle.

Copy. Enjoyed your rhyme schemes. Was interested to see you transition your style to topicals since its not something you often do. Your style brought a unique element. Very strict rhyme scheme that painted some vivid throughout. The only thing I felt this verse was missing was any sort of progression of thought, expanding and building on your ideas. Enjoyed the many references to nature throughout the verse.

Prognosis, two different approaches, both quite unique in their own right. Quite difficult to pick one over the other in terms of sheer enjoyability so im leaning Copys way for doing as good utilizing the topic more fully
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