Week 3 - Vividlyvague (2-0) vs. Mr. J (2-0) - VIVIDLYVAGUE WINS 6-2

[Objective]

Mr. J: As I start reading I was wondering where you were going with the rhymescheme, but it became more apparent as I kept reading and after the first half it flowed well without having to re-read anything. It read more to me as a freeverse poem at first, but I get what you were doing and I enjoyed it. A breath of fresh air tbh. I liked the set-up. It seems to me you're writing the story from the pov of a beggar which made this line especially powerful to me: ''the streets are poverish to our types anonymous.'' as if the beggars are anonymous to the eyes of everyone else.

I don't think the disclaimer at the end was needed tho'. I liked it like this.

Vividlyvague: The first thing that strikes me is; this shit's long as hell.. then when I start reading it seems like it'll progress well and I'll enjoy the story you've cooked up got for us. Thought this was dope: ''First flamenco this versed and gorgeous, impression was enormous.
Depressions ignored. Digression's reward: "Encore the performance!!!"'' Dope ish.

However, as the story kept going I kinda felt it lost track of what it initially was with jumping out of a window and escaping the cops kinda stuff. I see what you were getting at but it didn't really do it for more.

When I got to this line: ''He stared, sat, clenching the very instrument of his father's fame.
And smiled through their line of questioning as it came...'' I kinda felt like that image was what inspired you to write the entire thing. Thought the closure of your piece was satisfying enough allthough I didn't really feel the dramatic escape you were portraying earlier. Thought it was dope.

Vote: Another battle that's really hard to vote on cuz both got something the other one lacks.. Damn. I keep reading Mr.J's verse and enjoy it to the full extent, then I start reading Vivids shit and the storyline and everything kinda amazes me allthough there's place I didn't feel 100%, but yeah, shit's still dope af.

I think my vote got to go to Vivid for an extremely entertaining and thought out journey. That isn't to say Mr.J's story piece was any less, I had to pick one of the two and I'm a sucker for stories. Really dope battle guys.