Week 2 - Mr. J (1-0) vs. breathless (0-0) - MR. J WINS 9-4

Angkor · 10-06-2013, 10:59 PM

yea u guys do have a pretty similar style

Breathless - There were some cool ideas in this piece. The mean to an end line was a cool one. The issue i had was clarity. I was never sure what was being discussed. The tone was a bit too preachy for me but, i suppose with a topic like that, it's hard NOT to be a bit preachy lol.

Mr. J - While i dug some of the wordplay, some were just corny (if u don't mind my saying)

got me gassed up, regular unleaded, and now it has my brain burstin'

^^like that right there lol. But i thought ur piece was a little more coherent than ur opponent. It was still preachy in some areas but it was definitely a bit more fleshed out than ur opponent.

Vote - Mr. J - it was actually pretty even but Mr. J seem to put more effort into constructing an overall piece while Breathless was almost TOO occupied with clever lines, imo.

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10-06-2013, 10:59 PM	#19
Angkor Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 148 Battle Record: 1-3 Rep Power: 38	yea u guys do have a pretty similar style Breathless - There were some cool ideas in this piece. The mean to an end line was a cool one. The issue i had was clarity. I was never sure what was being discussed. The tone was a bit too preachy for me but, i suppose with a topic like that, it's hard NOT to be a bit preachy lol. Mr. J - While i dug some of the wordplay, some were just corny (if u don't mind my saying) got me gassed up, regular unleaded, and now it has my brain burstin' ^^like that right there lol. But i thought ur piece was a little more coherent than ur opponent. It was still preachy in some areas but it was definitely a bit more fleshed out than ur opponent. Vote - Mr. J - it was actually pretty even but Mr. J seem to put more effort into constructing an overall piece while Breathless was almost TOO occupied with clever lines, imo.