AOWL TAKEOVER TOURNEY SEMI-FINALS MAGAZINE - WE’RE GOING THE FUCK IN!!!!!!!! THIS IS NETCEES, BABY WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!’ ***READ NOW!!!!!******

[sral]

THE OFFICIAL NETCEES.ORG AOWL TAKEOVER TOURNAMENT
SEMI-FINALS
MAGAZINE!!!!!!




Greetings, boils and ghouls, and welcome back to the second instalment - and Semi-Finals - of our AOWL TAKEOVER TOURNEY MAGAZINE!!!!!

Let’s start this off with some positivity. This is the second topical tournament Netcees has held in just a few short months, we’re seeing some familiar faces stepping back into writing regularly, as well as some returning absentees that have taken time out of the game prior to their involvement here. What can we gauge from that? Well, the core members - the staples - those turning up consistently each and every week they’re signed in - give us a foundation we can try to rebuild upon. If the board sits silent without activity, no one is encouraged to take part in something and we’re effectively left with a desolate wasteland. Defunct. Unused. Forgotten. The more we can show that we have successful tournaments being seen through to completion with effort and love exerted, the more those wanting to write are encouraged to get involved. We have a lot to get through this week, so without further ado let’s just dive straight into proceedings here. Were there sure to be shocks? Absolutely. They’re inevitable in these sorts of things. While you can’t predict the unexpected happening, what you can do is try to prepare for it, and as always keeping a reliable stand-in list ready that can drop on short notice is a useful tool to have in the back pocket. Huge respect to the likes of @Etherwave, @brokenhal0 and @Regulator for staying ready with their pens sharpened to draw blood. They’re the real tournament MVP’s. I’ll +rep all of them accordingly in time (some are maxed out already until I share it around) but with plenty happening last round let’s kick things off with our…


ROUND ONE BATTLE RECAPS!!!!!!


@Dominate vs @Candy: This was one of my favourite topics of the round, in truth, I felt it was a somewhat challenging one - but that had some meat to it each could seek their teeth into. Candy with perhaps a more surrealist take, Dominate with a more literal one. It didn’t quite end up going down in that fashion, but that’s part of the fun on this, giving the writer a challenge to see what they can come up with. I promised you guys more substantial feedback in the ‘zine, so let’s delve deeper into both verses here. I thought Candy opened up quite well to set the narrative he was building, the diction was clear and concise, but a factor that seemingly went unmentioned was his rhyme placement - especially in those first few lines - where the rhymes were dense but the lines compact:

Three kings surrender to three wise men
eyes wide open soaks hope in opium
dopeamines mime stencil outlines render
dark shades and hues, waves of death ment to..

You can tell, for example, in this opening exchange that he has some degree of audio background. Does it work the same in text? Not exactly, and is perhaps less of a factor, but audio wise this sounds far better than it reads due to the amount of rhyming words in those lines - especially the second one (third too, for me). The fourth one isn’t as densely populated, admittedly, and that’s where he should have done to help give the quatrain more impact - but this is much better than the Candy were used to seeing.

As the verse progresses this is lost somewhat. There’s a short refrain, that implies a break from what proceeded it, and seems to want to speak to the reader directly here:

to what die like you (1)
or
live like you was

To when you went once (2)
because
were softer drugs

The lines become shorter still - the rhymes less frequent - the syllables per line halved. For me it had the opposite effect to what I believe was intended, it feels almost disconnected from the opening lines prior to it to me. The final line there in particular is troublesome, “because we’re softer drugs,” reads really unnaturally and feels like it’s missing a word. “They were softer drugs,” perhaps offers a simple solution? As it is it reads somewhat confusingly and again you want to eliminate small things like that in order for the verse to read smoothly for the viewership so that they can get everything you’re trying to say at the first time of reading. You don’t want them to lose the direction you’re leading them in, you don’t want them to be second guessing your intent, you want the writers voice to be clear and concise (even if you’re deliberately misleading them toward a later plot twist or point).

Just quickly while we’re at this particular juncture, I wasn’t a fan of the numbers in parenthesis either. I didn’t feel like they added anything, they weren’t required in my opening and the verse would have done better with them eliminated. Anything unnecessary should be scrapped. If it isn’t driving the story forwards somehow, get rid of it. Especially with such a short line limit requirement, you want to make every line count (just not by numbers). Lol.

This next section is a somewhat confusion addition too. It’s evidently drug-related, tying in many different substances, almost like some sort of hallucinogenic fever-dream being described while stoned.

the wind blows, swifts into shivers of legalization
sterilization of the mind wither like a silent Arabian night shone
our flesh melts like a mid life crisis in a come down of victory
spinin heroin lids in snow cones like ice cream delivery
probably wake up in another diamond field
maybe a rape dungeon of the kings first daughters wield

The wording again here lacks some clarity and direction, one voter described it as a ‘word salad’ which I thought was apt. Props to you. I enjoyed the wording of “shivers of legalization” though “swifts,” felt out of place to me in truth. I had difficulty rhyming ‘legalization’ and ‘night shone’ in my accent. I wasn’t a fan of the “flesh melts like a mid life crisis in a come down of victory,” if I’m truthful, though again perhaps you were attempting to lean into the whole drug-induced dreamscape type thing imagery wise here so I do allow for some leniency. I felt this particular section to be hit-and-miss for me. The ice cream delivery mention felt out of place, as did that final end rhyme for me which felt like you were simply painting by numbers at that point and searching for an end rhyme that proved somewhat elusive right there with “yield,”. It was more miss than hit reading it back a second and third time, with “shivers of legalization,” being my standout due to its wording.

“1 men says to 2-3”

You’re better than this, Candy. I mean come on, it’s one person you’re talking about and you’ve pluralised it right at the beginning there. I don’t want to harp on about this too heavily, but these are minor hiccups and simple fixes. It really wouldn’t take more than a brief read through or spell check even to correct this, I don’t know if you opted to straight up keystyle this in the reply box or what but your own work suffers as a result. You had a week, you had time to write something, you had the time to key it up and then sit and revise it if you wished before clicking submit. There’s no excuses here, this is on you.

There are faceless names attached to characters with no further development, they’re mentioned and not elaborated on, so the reader can’t become invested in them or their plight. They’re simply poorly devised plot devices without any backstory, description, or reason for being there other than to get you from A-B as quickly as possible.

Right, at this point let’s fast forward somewhat towards the closing lines. I hated the use of “lost nigger blues,” as I’m pretty sure you’re a skinny white Australian surfer looking guy. I can’t excuse it, even in topical / storytelling form. Sorry.

We’re going to take a look at what Dominate did in comparison. I thought you would enjoy toying with this particular topic as it could be interpreted in a myriad of different ways, instead it seems you struggled a little with this one. I do think you nailed the concept of detachment - turning it on its head here (pun always intended) to create something tangibly relatable to the topic at hand.

It isn’t quite peace - more like an emptiness, floating
A ghost ship, listing. Adrift in an infinite ocean
The world becomes a blur in the grip of centripetal motion -
Thoughts circling inwards until you’re too dizzy to focus

The opening lines were strong, with a clear display of technical skill and writers voice that overshadowed your opposition early on I felt. I’m not the greatest fan of rhymes like “emptiness, floating” with the comma in between them - largely just because the comma can be read as a pause between the two words and I’m (perhaps overly) mindful of how the reader perceives things when reading it back. Just a small point there, but one you may want to be mindful of, as kicking out those kinks can really pay dividends. “Adrift in an infinite ocean,” was a deft touch, for sure, but I also liked that you interpreted those swirling smoke clouds as thoughts - at times clouding their vision - This is where your text battle background serves you well because you’re able to form concepts in and around what the image presents you with. Could it perhaps have been given a more punchline-esque wording to create a clear quotable line here? Possibly, though it may run the risk of feeling out of place with the rest of the verse. That said, with high risk there’s also high reward, and I think with the right wording it could have been pulled off without being detrimental to the entire verse. You definitely have it in your wheelhouse, and it’s one thing you perhaps have as a USP that these other topical heads lack in, so utilise it more. Play to your strengths. You can create a ton of quote worthy material.

Emotions like faded photos in drawer that never gets opened
Hidden in their quiet prison. Unseen, and better unspoken

I see the overarching rhymescheme being carried into these lines, that’s not gone unnoticed don’t worry, but for this section I’m going to look at that first line more so. The idea of a faded photograph in a drawer has certainly been done before, but I did still like that here. The idea of our emotions being shut away, kept hidden and out of view, resonated more so with the theme of detachment and I’m not sure if people picked up on that outside of it being a good description used. This perhaps lacked a simple “a drawer” if we want to be pedantic, but I’m not here to play that.

It’s raindrops on the window. Double glazed and cool to the touch
Softened reflections.

Great follow up here with softened reflections after the mention of the window, the word association through that line preceding it was nicely worded too. It’s just all around solid writing, deserves a nod of acknowledgment on its own before whisking us into the next part where you switch up the scheme with internal rhymes

Colour and edges; muted and smudged
Dulling the senses. Sleepwalking, but lucid enough

I’m not entirely sure everyone caught the internal rhyme of “Colour and edges / dulling the senses,” in truth but your effort is appreciated by those that do for sure. From a purely technical standpoint, you’ve worked Candy here. From the opening 6 line carryover multi, to the switch up here being discussed, they’re like bodyshots doing accumulative damage while some armchair boxing fans may only be looking for the knockout blow that puts them down. You’re up on points by some margin in the opening rounds if we’re scoring this like we would a boxing match. It’s a terrible analogy, but the purists see what you’re doing.

Hollowness in places where you used to find endorphin highs
Connections now just relics from a distant time, a former life
Exchanges turn mechanical - singing silent chorus lines
Retreat inside a robot mind as if it’s mighty morphin time

I feel like at this point in time you’ve read his verse and decided you can dial it in. This to me is a level (or two) below the quality of your opening exchange. I really dislike that fourth line, it feels cheapened by the Power Rangers reference to me even if the idea of that and the robot mind is passable - there’s something about it ending on the mighty morphing time at the end that doesn’t sit well with me. In my opinion this was you just going through the motions, nothing really propelling the verse forward any further, the end rhymes are just there because I think it would be difficult for you not to use multies at this point in your craft but that last line is just comically “detached” from the vibe you had going. Perhaps there’s a delicious irony in there somewhere. For me, it was a huge misstep, I personally may have even omitted that from the verse entirely. Sorry.

It’s social skills on winter rations. Muscle memory interactions
Twist the dial back and forth, there’s only intermittent static
Apathy’s a cancer but it’s progress is asymptomatic
Hollow brick by hollow brick, you build your walls up single handed

Oh wow, right back at it. I guess you pissed yourself off at that previous quatrain because this reads like you’ve something to prove again. I liked a lot of this section, top to bottom. The brick by brick and word association with the walls was solid (tee hee). Nice work.

Something lost in every stone

Perhaps a coincidental follow-up, but I believe the intention was there to include stone after the last line. Subtle, but I see it.

Quickly bordering numberless
Until you’re sitting all alone
In your fortress of nothingness

We round things out with a somewhat polarising ending, satisfying and grounding the verse but perhaps it could have been brought to a close with something more concrete still to really have impact. It was more than enough in terms of writers voice, conceptually, and even large swatches of its execution. Did the brevity hurt it somewhat? Perhaps so, not enough to let your opponent in this time, but against our remaining contestants something so brief won’t coast by so easily.

We’re only one battle in and look how in-depth that breakdown was… ARE YOU PEOPLE NOT ENTERTAINED?! Fine, onto our next battle we go:

@Headless Verseman vs @Etherwave (replacing Master Rock): So there was always likely to be a bump in the road along the way, and I thought we had navigated that when Master Rock was forced to pull out on short notice. We replaced him quickly at short notice thanks to Etherwave stepping in, she wrote and showed up - all looked well - until Headless went behind 2-1 in votes… We suddenly had a new Head-ache (yep, pun intentional) with him then deleting his verse and conceding the match. I’m still not entirely sure what it was that spawned this turn of events, but that’s where we found ourselves. The verse was deleted, the battle conceded, his votes on other battles removed, and by the time I had next awoke in sunny Blighty the chat thread had blown up with umpteen responses and Etherwave not wanting to take part in further tournaments. Great. I presume Headless took a dislike to being down in votes somehow, but it was closer than perhaps he thought and so I had kept the battle open for feedback so he could see that. I didn’t have to, I’m not here to massage egos, I had no dog in that fight and if he wished to concede that is entirely on him. The deleting of the verse likely should have been a disqualification regardless, which I didn’t choose to pursue by the way, I thought the battle was close and wanted to see how things played out. Regardless of the eventual outcome and associated drama, let’s try to leave that at the door and take a look at the verses:


Etherwave:

Behind her the world was only a suggestion.
The imagination can run wild when you give it attention.
Inventions of monsters and heaven can create lessons, anxieties and tension.
But also peace.

If you’re familiar with Etherwave from her last tournament outing, she isn’t necessarily the strongest in terms of what we typically define as “technical” skill by way of adhering to a rigid rhyme scheme, or even multisyllable rhyming, but that only tells half of the story so far as she’s concerned. It’s evident here in these opening lines, for me, and if you’re initially deterred by the -tion ending rhymes (which I personally choose to only use sparingly in my own writing) it may be easy to overlook just how crisp things like her diction and writers voice can be. The rhymes can feel somewhat of a natural occurrence, rather than them being contrite or forced, which is a great testament to her and her ability – a factor often sadly overlooked. It’s evident in the opening couplet here, which I thought acted really well as an opening line to draw in the reader and hold their attention. It was short and punchy, it had enough intrigue to have you want to read on to find out more. In truth I wasn’t as big a fan of the third line in particular, though it perhaps is worth noting the rhyme placement helps make that line what it is with inVENTIONS of monsters and HEAVEN can create LESSONS, anxieties and TENSION. It isn’t perfect, but comes as close as perhaps she does to some traditional multi syllable rhymes. What I felt stood out most from this particular little stanza was that fourth line. A slight cliffnote. Half a bar, if you will, and deliberately not rhyming with those that precede it – but it gives it an added bite. It’s a clear break from the rhymes beforehand, a polar opposite to juxtapose those mentioned a line prior, and I enjoyed the duality I found in that. It’s actually not something you see used a lot, but shows her experience and a different degree of technical skill that what we perceive as the usual.




Finding new mysteries in every crack and crevice.
She created a whole new dimension. Tended to the garden on top of her skeleton.
Every thought a rebellion against reality. Too small to have dealt with the dull ache of raw hate, and laws couldn't save her at all.

This section is perhaps a little rougher around the edges, you can see that the second line has crept up a little in length from those before it, and the third line in particular is even lengthier (or reads that way) as it wraps around due to the formatting. “Tended to the garden on top of her skeleton,” is unique in its phrasing – referencing the image provided – but could be interpreted as her tending to her general unkempt appearance. It’s character building in one sense, developing this central female and her “rebellion,”. In that sense it’s effective and doing the job it’s intended to. It’s worth reminded that this was wrote quickly as a short-notice stand in verse also when the original competitor was forced to withdraw unexpectedly.




She lay 'wake through long nights holding tight to her blanket listening to the screaming down hall afraid one breath too Loud would call the demons to gnaw at her thawing flesh.
This isn't all in her head.

There’s a little more of the same here as the previous quatrain, though in these last two segments there is a noticeable lack of rhyme placement between the lines that doesn’t affect the implied rhythmic cadence somewhat. It doesn’t make for as smooth a read, and certainly the lines earlier - which were shorter and more concise with more internal rhyming – made for a more brief read. I will again mention that final fourth line and it being half a bar – it does give more gravitas to what is being said and makes the reader pay attention. It’s being used to good effect, capturing the viewers attention and holding it. This next section is interesting though for its formatting: 



And that's all she had.

Her skull.
And it was a fountain.
She realized it worked best with her heart pounding.
She learned the voices there can be the loudest, she didn't have to listen to God.

The line lengths here shift back to short and concise. There’s an erratic sort of feel to how they’re formed, very different to the wraparound text of earlier. This is more structured, almost conversational, and you can feel a sort of change in pace to the writing – things have quickened, its more frenzied. The pace has grown quicker. It’s almost a rapid-fire delivery as events are unfolding and we’re given a play-by-play. The other great thing here is the fountain / pounding / loudest rhyme before Ether ends things on a completely different rhyme. It’s quite subtle, but again effective. She clearly has some mastery on wording to deliver the end lines in such a way that gives them impact. It isn’t the same wording re-used over and over again either, yet she is hitting on those points consistently at exactly the right moment. 



Oh she was drowning in her own thoughts.



Hard to say who was at fault.



So she locked her away in a place no one could find her.



Where the warmth is much kinder.



An orchard where the birds are her friends and she is loved by the wind.



Something took her place, some kind of dying twin.



But I'm fine within.

This builds further on the idea of the characters thoughts and fears, the character development is the most interesting as as we’re fed titbits of information that reveal her past slowly. There perhaps isn’t enough to fully develop this character, but the snippets give the reader enough to internalise and begin forming an idea of what may have lead her to this moment. “Where the warmth is much kinder,” was a particularly well worded line I thought as it intimates that the world she knew, or her past, is otherwise cold. The rhyme of “by the wind,” / “dying twin” is noted, though seemingly unintentional given the rest of the verse, however that final line sees a subtle twist of sorts where it shifts from “something took her place” to “But I’m fine within,”. Is the girl she is writing about actually Etherwave herself? That is certainly the impression I got from it when reading. The shift from the third to first person definitely implies such, and was very understated, not spoonfeeding the reader but giving them the information for them to reach a logical conclusion. 



My minds a shrine, where I hide from Him.


Where she hides from them.


But she can still be found in her garden amongst the apples that shine and glisten.


There's nothing rotten here.

Her skull is fine but times a prison.


I know peace and love will be my final vision.

I thought this rounded things out nicely, a message that despite the hardship endured and all of her fraught past experiences - she isn’t affected mentally by the events and knows in herself that she will be okay. “Times a prison,” was a well worked phrase, seemingly implying that holding onto the past is often detrimental and it‘s only by letting it affect you that it’s hold continues. If you don’t let it affect who you are, you can become free. I could be wrong, but that was my take. A really solid submission considering the time constraints and her filling in at short notice, I thought.
@Headless Verseman:

Busy in thought thinking of the misery brought
My mother died birthing me, the apple fell, it physically dropped

The opening lines were reasonably well done, I wasn’t a fan of the end rhyme “it physically dropped,” in the second line as it felt out of place somewhat. I thought perhaps you could have substituted that out for something more substantial, but it wasn’t necessarily bad by any means and I thought from a technical standpoint you were the more proficient of the two here.

Hurting me, the entire world seems absurd to me
Transfixed on death that's been hanging around since they were nursing me
My father was always cursing me, to him I was a lost cause
A mistake, definitely not a happy little accident ala Bob Ross

This section wasn’t helped by the recurring use of “me,” as part of the rhyme. I can look past that, certainly, for but a veteran as experienced as yourself - and particular in this format with a reputation that proceeds him - I can’t help but feel you’re better than what we see done here. The Bob Ross line is somewhat comical, though does feel out of place given just a few lines before you were mentioning deaths twice in as little as four lines. It’s a difficult verse to get into, especially when compared directly with the opening of Etherwave’s, she started strongly before faltering somewhat while you’ve not started as strong as your opponent which may have already placed you on the back foot in the minds of some viewers.

Now I sit here happily, content and speak thanks
That my father finally did one good thing in his life and hung himself from this tree branch

The wording of “speak thanks,” in this couplet reads somewhat unnaturally to me. It’s perhaps more noticeable than it otherwise would have been due to the fact it’s an end rhyme, seeming to emphasise it somewhat, I can see why you would do it for the purpose of rhyme - but it does come off unnatural sounding and again another choice may have been more preferential. The tree branch line is noticeably longer than those that came before it, the syllable length slowly creeping up, and affecting an implied rhythmic cadence.

A balance of sanguine/rot, I'm paying the price
The pain for talent sought, content aknowleding the transient nature of life
Reading Allan Watts, how can I figure out the sentences
and ponder everything around me and our interconnectedness

I wasn’t a fan of “sanguine/rot” being in there. This isn’t anything personal, I’ve never liked it when I’ve seen people do that. I’m aware some do, and have done in the past, but to me it comes off slightly lazy and like they couldn’t be bothered to find something more apt that worked. It’s so simple to change that up into something else, it would literally take mere seconds once you’ve reached a certain level of skill - and not even one that great. It’s an easy fix. The fact it’s been left in there is another indication to me that this was wrote relatively quickly, it’s certainly not the best effort I’ve seen you put forward (I remember your Nas type verse about the bullet travelling backward, for example). In your heart of hearts you’ll know as well as me this wasn’t one of your better showings. I don’t feel it’s disrespectful to say that. You’re better than the quality of this verse reflects you to be.

The birds and the bees, the worms and the trees
The dirt and the leaves, the clouds swirling with glee

I can see the rhyme scheme you’ve toyed with here, again it’s noticeably more difficult than those rhymes your opponent has deployed on a technical level and that does hold some degree of skill worth its merit - You are the more technically proficient writer in this sense and that’s evident - but this particular multi scheme isn’t all that difficult to pull off, and while it is a switch up from the lines that came before it, which I enjoy, I can’t honestly say I was over enamoured with it to the point that it proved a deciding factor in my final vote.

But then darkness fell over me chillingly
With all my heart it seems, I've fallen victim from the start
If we are all connected my father tried killing me! but which part...

The technical merits you show in terms of rhyme scheme and multi syllable writing may not be matched by your opponent, but she certainly matched you - and even excelled - in areas like writers voice, wording and execution. The twist at the end was unexpected, foreshadowed slightly at the start of the verse by focusing on the mother before shifting things at the end to framing the father as having killed her - and consequently killing a part of you in the process. The idea had legs, but it lacked in some consistency and execution overall, allowing Etherwave enough wiggle room to claim the victory. You shouldn’t feel that hard done by. There was no robbery, and I think on a second read once emotions have subsided and you’re able to read these objectively you’ll see that. The right (wo)man won.


@Scar vs. @symetrik - This was somewhat of the sleeper battle of the round on paper, perhaps some aren’t as familiar with these pair as I am myself having competed in leagues alongside both of them previously. Symetrik has grown into his own over the past twelve months or so and we’ve seen a huge upward turn in his trajectory, him reaching his first tournament finals here just a few months ago. Scar has been absent from the game for a while, perhaps even for the duration of time that Symetrik has seen himself improve, but rest assured Scar can write. Let’s see how this one played out:
@Scar:

“Bonnie Blue Mark”

she sang the blues
complex melodies tatted along a patch perusing the back movement of her neck.
Afternoon. Perhaps a glass or two.
It was a habit. Soon she’d hit the sack for two or some hours of sex.
Then Showered and dress.

The internal rhyming was there in that second line, though perhaps its placement wasn’t quite where you may expect it to be. There’s quite a few syllables before you get to the internal rhyme, for example, then you get another quite quickly following it before a non-rhyming end. I recognise the internal scheming being done, though not everyone may immediately, so it is worth being mindful of that. I again note that the ‘afternoon’, ‘glass or two’, ‘habit soon’ are all put there purposefully, if I’m completely honeys with you I’m not as huge a fan of the ‘habit. Soon’ internal rhyme with the sentence ending between them as it creates a sort of pause between the two - rather than it being read as a run-on sentence. I can see why you did it, but for future reference those are perhaps best avoided. I’ve mentioned it a couple of times in my write ups already, so you aren’t alone in doing things like this, but iron those small errors out and your writing will be all the better for it. Be mindful that how your audience read this may differ from how you intend it, or how you yourself read it, try to put yourself in the eyes of the reader and try to see things from their perspective when you’re writing. You want them to be able to catch these things on first read, without needing to go back and check for themselves, keep it clear and concise and easy to digest. I wasn’t a great fan of “hours of sex,” being there either if I’m being fussy, it just read a little immature and childish but that is often the case when the subject is brought up on forums such as this I find. For me, the language used didn’t quite fit with the subject matter at hand and felt a little disjointed. “Two of some hours,” needed rewording. “Showered and dress,” also had the same issue for me. It was a minor thing, but easily fixable, and again as I’ve mentioned earlier in the magazine with reference to another verse dropped this round - it would have been a relatively easy fix to put right with a little care and consideration. It felt sloppy and hastily thrown together, maybe more noticeable with it being an end rhyme. Pay attention to those end rhymes, people. I can’t stress this enough, but how that line ends is the last thing your reader remembers from the line. You want to end each strongly. It would be like a comedian fumbling the punchline right at the critical moment. Missing your chance.

They’d leave as she stares at the nothing in between.
Purple pigments painted her jaws as she careened stretched -
out on silk linen. Swimming in velvet dreams. She’d powder her chest and esteem.
The mirror…

“Stares at the nothing in between,” I really liked. The alliteration of ‘purple pigments painted,” was worked in well (yes, that was deliberate too!), I wasn’t as keen on “careened stretched” at the end of the line - I thought you should have switched that out for an alternative here (and it was an end rhyme also) but it felt like there should have been a comma between them both. “Velvet dreams,” was a nice description I thought.

An image. Perhaps sixteen years at best
skipping stones behind the house on Neponset as uncle Harold’s hand cupped the bows of her breast..

Nonetheless, Bruises are bad for business. Showered and dressed,
She hopscotched across the avenue as the hours reset.
The Cheshire moon grinning, she wandered the town for a sense...
The sound, existential musing; a roundabout way of downing a sense of....what?
Respect, maybe?
So she drowns in the scents.
Empty bottle. It was gone. Nothing left. Autumn apple intimacy, vanishing at the drop of the seizing.
Left with nothing but love notes and tatted bodies used to sing the blues til she’s dead.

Uncle Harold really needed more development in my opinion, Bonnie too here with some more foreshadowing possibly. As it is we’ve essentially just names attached to past actions and it can feel a little flat and one dimensional without the reader being invested in the characters and their predicament(s) or resolution. The line limits probably don’t help so much in these early rounds as 32 lines is restrictive as to how much you can develop a character - I completely understand that fact - though with that said the piece turned in was shorter than the maximum line limit allowed and it was a choice to opt for the character driven narrative, other options were available to you, so perhaps that’s something you may want to consider regarding the approach you take in future matchups with 32 line limits. The character driven narratives are probably better suited to longer line limits that allow for more room to work with. Not a criticism, just some advice from an old hand at this. The approach can be equally as important as the execution. “Cheshire moon grinning,” was a particular highlight for me, kudos on that one.
@symetrik:

“You’re like an angel of love”; I knew it was destined to be.
”Like Cupid?”, she cooed, as she pressed into me,
and I would nod, wooed by the beauty I’d see
beneath white cotton cloth as she moved in the sheets.
I was awestruck; I couldn’t find a sentence to speak
as she got up and washed up and pretended to leave
like she had to befuddle all the rules that I loosely believed,
but she was the half of my puzzle that made us truly complete.

Your progression over the past 12-16 months has been great to witness, this verse sums that development up very well in my opinion. The lines are short and concise, there’s not a word wasted, the opening dialogue between the two characters here is natural sounding and crisp, there’s even a slightly comedic feel to it I felt - but what is really worth highlighting for people here is the writers voice you have. You plonk the reader directly into the story and develop it from there, the pacing is quick, and end rhymes flowing freely and naturally to the point there’s a deceptive ease to the read - yet from a more technical perspective when you analyse it you actually switch it up as below:

AxxB
AxxB
CxxB
CxxB
AxxB
AxxB
CxxB
CxxB

This is probably overlooked by some that only see the end rhyme, but the difference in execution between you and Scar even from the first eight lines of each verse when you compare them is night and day. He was doing a lot of internal rhyming, with less of an implied rhythmic cadence, while you have a much stronger understanding as to the implied flow of your piece from a readers perspective and coupled that with a more rigid rhyme scheme (though it certainly doesn’t feel rigid, in fact it reads very fluently). There’s a deceptive complexity in its simplicity. It’s just good writing that can be appreciated by both the purists and the armchair fans alike. This is Sym at his very best.

She was a path to relief. Eating apples and peach pie,
we would laugh through the weeks and dabble in sweet lies,
like we were passion released, like the rattle of breached skies,
as we dashed to the tree lines in a battle to keep dry.
Time is fleeting as it speeds by, and I could see why
she was leaving. Esteem only lasts ‘til the dreams die,
so I asked her to freeze briefly cuz she had to be mine,
and I enshrined her in canvas and unhanded her when promised I’d be fine.

-sigh-

I see you with the dual rhymescheme here, very Lars-esque some may say. God forbid me to. I thought perhaps you should have loosened up the scheme after “battle to keep dry,” instead of holding onto it, there were a few syllable mismatches that wouldn’t be so much of an issue in audio but in text they can be readily noticeable. It’s nitpicking, essentially, but fine margins are often how these things are fought and won so it’s worth highlighting them here for you to learn where to tighten up and grow even better. We see what you’re doing, we appreciate it, and the fact you were able to do so much in so few lines shows you are learning. You have all the tools in place to win this thing, how far you do progress is largely dependent on yourself and a bit of luck going your way. This was a solid submission Sym.
@MMLP vs. @Inno - This was a repeat of our Black August finals, where Inno came out the victor, and if I can be brutally honest he was unfortunate not to emerge victorious again here in truth. I feel for him. I really didn’t want to have to vote on this one as I thought it would be controversial, so I stayed firmly out of it. I threw everything at getting this battle votes, tagged what must have been every name that has ever posted an Open Mic verse here, Answer stopped by to politely tell me to go fuck myself. Thanks for that, mate. In the end this one went all the way to the wire with a final vote being cast by… DOPEGIRL of all people. Jesus fucking Christ. I’m aware that Erica is a long-standing member of the forum, and not an alias, she has voted on many battles previously which have been accepted - and even AOWL Championship matches that I have been apart of where her votes have counted. The tournament needed to move along to maintain momentum, and in the lack of any further votes on this close battle - unfortunately we had to take what we had for the benefit of the tourney as a whole. Shocking, I know, and we should really be doing better, but such is the state of text at this point in 2024. It’s a long road to recovery. Anyway, let’s try and show these guys some love on their verses with the breakdown:

@Inno:

Why do the lost search to be found?
Always reaching amongst the crowd
seeking for destiny in a different world.
Perching themselves along stars that don't belong to them.

I thought you opened proceedings up strongly, the question in the opening line created an intrigue about where this would go - and how it would relate to the image at large - the lines were short and succinct, the rhyming sparse - but the vehicle wasn’t as important as the journey you were planning to take us on here and that’s evident. Interestingly perhaps is the use of that non-rhyming last line of the quatrain, which is similar to what I noted being used by Etherwave. Is there a poetry term for that I’m perhaps unfamiliar with that you users are? It seems to be an effective tool when used in this manner and one I’ve noted in both verses, so it clearly stands out and gives a great effect. Perhaps I should use that more in my own work. I fuck with it. Lol.

Trying to breach a new horizon on a whim.
Is it a useless task to want something different
To change the stripes giving to another pigment.
Evolution tells us it's human nature,
Change is imminent and always consistent.
Is that why it's such a difficult target
They tell us aim to be ourselves,
That statement couldn't be more ironic.

At first I was unsure whether the big picture epic being favoured over a more direct approach was the right choice here - but I certainly now feel this played to your own strengths more and offered you more in terms of creativity. “New horizons,” was a great subtle tie-in to the image provided, the changing of stripes and pigment was a fantastic spin you worked in here conceptually that I thought was awesome. This section as a whole was really well put together and a personal highlight to the verse for me. I think some choose to focus on the technical ability of a writer judging only by their myltisyllabic rhymes and the schemes deployed, but this is the second battle this round where there’s definitely more variables to it than “just” those elements. They shouldn’t be overlooked, and yet they often are, which is why I enjoy highlighting these other literary elements for people in my votes and feedback.

For most the road trekked is solid stone
The path taken chosen long before your born.
But destiny is such an uncertain theme
If destiny is certain then what's the use of a dream
For what then do humans reach for the stars
When the dreams you grip onto only leave scars
Only create more wounds wanting to heal
Puncturing through hopes thin vale
Until you find yourself another cog in the wheel.
Among the gallons of water, another drop in the pale.

I thought the last line here was the best, I imagine you did too hence it’s placement at that precise moment. The rest does build slowly towards that sentiment, but I did feel it didn’t offer quite as much as the lines preceding them, you know? It leaned hard into the bigger picture idea you were crafting but only touched on the image itself tangibly here, I felt perhaps had you managed to incorporate more elements from the picture into this segment - or more to do with the octopus and balloon (your opponents golden opportunity mention for example may have worked well here) it would have elevated it further still.

Monotony takes control and it's routine
Tick goes the tock lost in pendulum' swing.
How funny a thing, life is a character in your comedy.
Laughing at your fickle dream of changing the theme.
Mocking the stupid hope you cling to
Destiny is so heavy, is it worth it to sink to?

If losing my self is the only way to be found
Then I'll search for an eternity with my ear to the ground.

I thought the resolution here was strong, I did feel again it almost went away from the image itself - and beyond it too - perhaps it veered slightly too far in that direction not just at the end but also throughout - maybe an idea would have been to have started out with the microcosm of the octopuses solitary life and then posit these philosophical questions later won before bringing things back full circle and focusing attention back firmly on the details in the image. That could be personal preference, as I tend to be more direct than I do big picture, even though I do mix it up at times. I think that may have been an option I would perhaps have opted for to this, but something more firmly rooted in the octopus and humanising him (or her) more maybe during and throughout.
@MMLP: I thought you would find this picture topic a challenge, and I’m glad you at least threw your weight behind it and attempted to create something. It’s been a long time since we saw you write so I wondered how much ring rust may have set in.

An introvert amongst all the invertebrates.
Who would seldom ask for any help,
tides would begin to turn, altering my inner workings,
shaping the hands that I was dealt.
Required no backbone to stand up for myself or my streaky neighbours.
Basking in this pelagic environment of freedom chasers.

My initial thoughts here were that the opening lines were too long and wordy, the play on words around “Introvert,” and “Invertebrate,” was evident but could perhaps have been shortened by making it a portmanteau of both. The internal rhyme here of ‘begin to turn/inner work’ was subtle and perhaps overlooked by some on first read but it’s actually integral to that particular lines rhythmic cadence working - especially given its length. Just quickly while on that point, if we compare the introduction of yours to your opponents - it’s easy to see why so many were drawn towards Innovator from the off. If you overlooked the multisyllble rhyming and scheming, he has much shorter line lengths that are crisp and concise - making it easily digestible for the reader - he doesn’t overreach his hand and instead focuses on delivering something with clarity - setting out his stall early on for something bigger picture, rather than attacking the image head-on as you do. It’s interesting how different both are in their execution, even from that opening salvo of four or so lines, but there’s a clear divide between the two pieces early on. The use of the word ‘pelagic’ was a fantastic word choice, keeping the readers interest, and easy to guess as it’s meaning given the topic even if they weren’t immediately familiar with if. No backbone was a fun little knowing nod, though ‘streaky neighbours’ perhaps didn’t work as well for me personally here.

The clumpy coral reefs were radiant with the weedy ageless algae scattering the scenery,
It was a sea of green for acres on this continental plate.
Would frequently dream of greatness, wishing to be the one that got away!

The imagery here was your strong point, from “clumpy coral reefs,” to “ageless algae”, which proves a nice display of alliteration and a good penmanship. “Sea of green,” perhaps a lesser display of creative writing but solid none the less as a description. I didn’t think “continental plate / one that got away,” was a clean an end rhyme as it could have been - especially with it being an end rhyme. Internally it would have passed more unnoticeably, but at the end of a line it stands out that little bit more due to it being the last thing you remember being said as a reader. Is it a minor thing? Certainly, and relatively easy to fix, nothing particularly wrong with what was done - more so just something to be mindful of with the reader in mind when writing. These small margins can prove decisive when it comes to the vote breakdown, so eliminating as many of these as possible will make you tougher to beat.

Often contemplating as to what’s above, on the other side.
Our state abode, a commonplace in which over compensated the status quo.
Meaning the offer in my change of role was justified.
So I’d brush aside, those who wouldn’t fly with me as I pushed the furthest.
My approach, unsportsmanlike as glowing summer skies seeped through the water’s surface.
The light above the murkiest bight was the eye-opener in truth.
A multipurpose mollusc now imbued with resolve and no moment to lose.
Finding a fund of purpose, hope was totally renewed.
With a clear motive to pursue then its mission complete.
My wish was to flee, but as I focused on the blue.

I quoted a rather sizeable section here so there is quite a lot to unpack, but also a lot I feel can be addressed along a similar line. The first I’ll bring up is the formatting of the lines, which I think perhaps hurt you somewhat due to it not following the traditional idea of what’s known in these things. This could be due to your time away, or writing on your phone or something, but the formatting at times can throw the reader off as to where the end of the line is - or where the rhymes are - and having seen the votes cast this is definitely something I feel many also felt who left feedback. Particularly here the status quo ending couplet is guilty of it. I see some picked up on the internalised rhymes, but not everyone will have done so, and that was to your detriment as you went behind in votes to begin with. I didn’t feel a great deal of this progressed the story forward necessarily, it seemed more like an exercise in rhyming well enough to dig you out of a hole. You could perhaps leaned into the imagery more, or humanising the octopus as I mentioned to Inno which I felt have room to expand upon, instead we have this almost overly complex scheme that isn’t adding a great deal to the storyline or characters development really for me. There are a few turns of phrase I didn’t particularly like, “murkiest bight,” “a fund of purpose,” and “focused on the blue,” in particular I felt could have been better. Multipurpose mollusc was another alliterative term I did enjoy though. A guilty pleasure perhaps since I’ve a penchant for those on occasion.

That’s when I noticed a balloon which gleamed, it was my golden opportunity
Awarded with an open ticket to freedom, with the target ahead.
Without skipping a beat, I would depart from the rest.
As this monstrous fleshy, cherry tomato ascends through the air bubbles and froth.
Was a martyr who harnessed the strength to conquer the depths whilst thrusting aloft
Jumping along the mass of the ocean with a rapturous leap
but at what cost?
This watery coated glass was my ceiling that I’d shattered to pieces
But as I breached the aquatic region, I began struggling to gasp
Arms fully clenched, wrapping all these tentacles and clutching on the band.
Open-mouthed when coming across land, I was soon in awe.
Without knowing this gulp, would be my last
It turned out all to be a sham. Consortiums, be careful what you wish for

The ‘noticed a balloon which gleamed/golden opportunity’ was real smooth and a nice tie-in to the topic image. The internal rhymes here are worked well, done subtly with ticket to freedom/skipping a beat and all, but the standout here is perhaps the imagery of “Fleshy cherry tomato,”. I wasn’t the greatest fan of fleshy and cherry being used if I’m completely truthful, they were too similar sounding, but the “cherry tomato” on its own was a really comedic description I enjoyed. The watery glass ceiling, or oceans surface, was a nice idea - The resolution being that he broke free of the surface only to end up dying was quite abrupt, perhaps needing more by means of that section of the story to fully ‘flesh’ it out (Yup), and anchor it more strongly in the final third. As is it felt somewhat rushed towards the end, saved for just two lines near the closure - maybe left a little too late to really close proceedings with the impact required. This battle really was one of personal preference and stylistics, two very different writers with alternate takes in terms of concept and execution. It was an incredibly close contest, inarguably the closest of the round and the votes reflected that, but sadly with no further voters around we were forced to continue on with the tournament and close this out at 4-3 in favour of MMLP. I would rather have not have been forced to do that. I would ideally have had someone up by two votes before closing this one out, but with the deadline for the next round fast approaching, and with the tournaments momentum paramount, beggars couldn’t be choosers and we were forced to take what we had. I tagged over 100 members in the thread, everyone who has ever posted an Open Mic verse here were tagged, if enough felt the wrong person was winning there was amply opportunity to cast a quick vote and, well… unfortunately no one else did. It sucks but we must look forward. What a battle though, guys!

VERSE OF THE WEEK!!!!!!

So with all verses thoroughly read and reviewed, who achieves top marks to be awarded Lars’ elusive Verse Of The Week award? For me, it’s largely a toss-up between two emcees: Symetrik and @Dominate. For me they both embodied the aspects of topical writing I place most importance on. From a technical standpoint there was little between the two in terms of writers voice and rhyme scheme, with perhaps a slight nod towards Symetrik in terms of scheming as his verse was more primarily focused on that aspect than Dom’s. What I will add, however, is that Symetrik’s rigid rhyme scheme also hindered his verse a little - particularly towards the end - and it’s finding that correct balance between the two where Symetrik will really begin to shine. It isn’t that Dominate is unable to match that rhyme scheme, it’s that he’s experienced enough to know when and how to deploy them to best effect. I think, on the whole, his submission was the more consistent read of the two with only a slight hiccup around the Mighty Morphin time line that I wasn’t particularly fond of. For that reason, Dominate, congratulations and you’re awarded the Verse Of The Week:

Originally Posted by Dominate

“Detachment”

It isn’t quite peace - more like an emptiness, floating
A ghost ship, listing. Adrift in an infinite ocean
The world becomes a blur in the grip of centripetal motion -
Thoughts circling inwards until you’re too dizzy to focus
Emotions like faded photos in drawer that never gets opened
Hidden in their quiet prison. Unseen, and better unspoken
It’s raindrops on the window. Double glazed and cool to the touch
Softened reflections. Colour and edges; muted and smudged
Dulling the senses. Sleepwalking, but lucid enough
Bowed to the pull of indifference, and so secure in the numbness
It’s..
Hollowness in places where you used to find endorphin highs
Connections now just relics from a distant time, a former life
Exchanges turn mechanical - singing silent chorus lines
Retreat inside a robot mind as if it’s mighty morphin time
It’s social skills on winter rations. Muscle memory interactions
Twist the dial back and forth, there’s only intermittent static
Apathy’s a cancer but it’s progress is asymptomatic
Hollow brick by hollow brick, you build your walls up single handed
Something lost in every stone
Quickly bordering numberless
Until you’re sitting all alone
In your fortress of nothingness

BATTLE OF THE WEEK!!!

For me, this one was a no-brainer this week. It was the closest contest by far, the votes swung from one battler to the other and back again in a true rollercoaster of a ride. I tagged in so many people, over 100 usernames, in fact I tagged everyone that has ever posted an Open Mic verse here ever. Still no further votes. Answer stopped by to tell me to go fuck myself, which was about as helpful as you can likely expect from Netcees. Ideally, of course, I would have preferred to have had a clear winner up by a +2 vote margin. As it stood, the only person who has taken their time to cast a vote was Dopegirl. Now, I have to keep in mind that she is a long term member of Netcees, not an alias, and her votes have counted previously in the AOWL – including in Championship matches that I have personally been involved in. While I feel for Inno, and I genuinely do, I had no choice but to accept the vote for the momentum of the tournament to continue and to progress to the next round without unnecessary delay. It’s a crappy way to exit. The only slight solace I can offer up is that I had kept the battle open for hours so that anyone could vote for him if they felt he won, no one came forward to do so. I tagged a whole heap of people to come and cast a vote if they felt he won, again no one stepped up. I gave as wide an opportunity as I could before moving along, far longer than I had originally intended. New threads were meant to be put up Monday night my time, I left it until Tuesday morning just in case. He’s a victim of circumstance more than anything more… BUT, with that said, this was our Battle Of The Week. Inno vs. MMLP. Two vastly differing takes on the subject, but barely anything to separate them in the voters eyes:

Originally Posted by MMLP

Attachment 523
An introvert amongst all the invertebrates.
Who would seldom ask for any help,
tides would begin to turn, altering my inner workings,
shaping the hands that I was dealt.
Required no backbone to stand up for myself or my streaky neighbours.
Basking in this pelagic environment of freedom chasers.
The clumpy coral reefs were radiant with the weedy ageless algae scattering the scenery,
It was a sea of green for acres on this continental plate.
Would frequently dream of greatness, wishing to be the one that got away!
Often contemplating as to what’s above, on the other side.
Our state abode, a commonplace in which over compensated the status quo.
Meaning the offer in my change of role was justified.
So I’d brush aside, those who wouldn’t fly with me as I pushed the furthest.
My approach, unsportsmanlike as glowing summer skies seeped through the water’s surface.
The light above the murkiest bight was the eye-opener in truth.
A multipurpose mollusc now imbued with resolve and no moment to lose.
Finding a fund of purpose, hope was totally renewed.
With a clear motive to pursue then its mission complete.
My wish was to flee, but as I focused on the blue.
That’s when I noticed a balloon which gleamed, it was my golden opportunity
Awarded with an open ticket to freedom, with the target ahead.
Without skipping a beat, I would depart from the rest.
As this monstrous fleshy, cherry tomato ascends through the air bubbles and froth.
Was a martyr who harnessed the strength to conquer the depths whilst thrusting aloft
Jumping along the mass of the ocean with a rapturous leap
but at what cost?
This watery coated glass was my ceiling that I’d shattered to pieces
But as I breached the aquatic region, I began struggling to gasp
Arms fully clenched, wrapping all these tentacles and clutching on the band.
Open-mouthed when coming across land, I was soon in awe.
Without knowing this gulp, would be my last
It turned out all to be a sham. Consortiums, be careful what you wish for

VS.

Originally Posted by Inno

Why do the lost search to be found?
Always reaching amongst the crowd
seeking for destiny in a different world.
Perching themselves along stars that don't belong to them.
Trying to breach a new horizon on a whim.
Is it a useless task to want something different
To change the stripes giving to another pigment.
Evolution tells us it's human nature,
Change is imminent and always consistent.
Is that why it's such a difficult target
They tell us aim to be ourselves,
That statement couldn't be more ironic.

For most the road trekked is solid stone
The path taken chosen long before your born.
But destiny is such an uncertain theme
If destiny is certain then what's the use of a dream
For what then do humans reach for the stars
When the dreams you grip onto only leave scars
Only create more wounds wanting to heal
Puncturing through hopes thin vale
Until you find yourself another cog in the wheel.
Among the gallons of water, another drop in the pale.

Monotony takes control and it's routine
Tick goes the tock lost in pendulum' swing.
How funny a thing, life is a character in your comedy.
Laughing at your fickle dream of changing the theme.
Mocking the stupid hope you cling to
Destiny is so heavy, is it worth it to sink to?

If losing my self is the only way to be found
Then I'll search for an eternity with my ear to the ground.

TOURNEY BRACKETS!!!!!

For no good reason at all other than the fact I made this graphic - This is how our tourney bracket is looking following the first round matchups being concluded:



AOWL TAKEOVER TOURNEY MEMES!!!!!

















SEMI-FINAL BATTLE PREVIEWS!!!

With that said, let’s get straight into this section then, the upcoming AOWL Takeover Tournament SEEEEEMMMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII FINNNNNNNNAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS SSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


@MMLP vs @symetrik: This feels like a battle that should have happened already in the AOWL at some point. Perhaps it has but I don’t recall it as of writing this and I’m feeling lazy enough not to look it up. They can correct me if they wish. Two opponents highly skilled in the technical sense, both perennially floating there and abouts when it comes to the AOWL championship matches - but both missing out when it comes to the very top of the game. MMLP is lucky to still be around after his close contest with Inno, while Symetrik made light work of a returning Scar… could he be about to claim his second returning scalp here? It’s highly possible. He’s in a rich vein of form and that purple patch appears to be continuing, so we’re going to need an MMLP in the kind of form that saw him reach the AOWL Championship match if he is likely to pull off a win here. It’s no easy feat after such a lengthy absence from the game. The smart money is surely on Symetrik here, but this one should prove a much tougher test than Scar managed and MMLP used up the maximum line limit last time out. I trust he’ll be looking to utilise every line he can again here. Sym best be ready.



@Dominate vs @Etherwave: This should be an absolute banger of a semi-finals matchup with NC veteran and Verse Of The Week winner Dominate meeting eventual winner of The Topical Tournament 2024 Etherwave. Two distinctly different writers both in style, substance and sexuality. Are we allowed to mention their gender in 2024? It’s probably controversial, but there we have it. Too late now. It’s a real head scratcher to predict this one and I believe we’ll see this come down to who creates the better take on the topic itself, it’s a tricky little blighter - perhaps slightly favouring our crazy cat lady herself (am I able to say that? Too late.) but Dominate won’t be caught sleeping here I’m sure. The topic is deliberately difficult. I want them both to have to think long and hard and tease something out from it, it’s meant to be challenging. Perhaps I’ve overdone it in that respect, but I do also feel like it lends itself to Dominate’s innate ability to craft something outside of the topic image itself. Rather than work solely within its confines, he tends to use it as a prompt to immerse himself in and explores the bigger picture thematically - such as last weeks piece on “Detachment,”. The fans will be the winners of this one, though for my money I would suggest me leaning slightly towards Dominate in terms of him having the ability to couple his technical prowess with his writing ability and that could well prove the deciding factor here. I think he holds an edge stylistically, in terms of his technical ability, plus also his execution. This isn’t unfamiliar territory for Etherwave though as she has been written off time and time again previously - coming up trumps each time. Can she continue the streak?



LMAO & WTF'S OF THE WEEK!!!!


LMAO @ Headless losing his head last week. The irony.
WTF @ that Inno vs MMLP match being decided by Robranda? Please don’t let that happen.
LMAO @ these ridiculous verse breakdowns for an 8-Man tourney.
WTF do you even call an 8-Man tourney when there’s a female entrant?
LMAO @ How retarded I am
WTF @ How lucky MMLP is to be still be involved. Son of a bitch.
LMAO @ The memes on deck this week. Absolutely savage.
WTF @ Master Rock bowing our two opening rounds in a row?!
LMAO @ Text battles dying before their topical overlords.
WTF@ Mike Wrecka showing up to vote when least needed
LMAO just kidding Mike, stick around. I may need you again this round.
WTF @ Us managing to get our former tourney champ to defend.
LMAO @ her thinking we're letting her escape. No chance.
WTF @ Netcees chasing 99.9% of females off the board?
LMAO @ How quick I got this up. You're welcome.


DO ME A FAVOUR AND WRITE LIKE YOUR LIVES DEPEND ON IT!!!!!!!!!


PEACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!