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#4 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 708
Battle Record: 5-7
Rep Power: 12429299 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
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short and sweet:
cereal - length is your enemy. your pieces are incredibly abstract and on occasion, I felt like "holy shit wait are we... in the chamber? are we... at this point in the story" but I couldn't even come close to being sure. a lot of seemingly non-hogwarts things, and even though I barely know the setting, I know for damn sure hufflepuff ain't green. this goes all over the place, and takes "abstraction" too far. rock - simple and focused basically entirely on pain. simple by which I mean simplistic, but you held things together and it made a cohesive read. not impressed but it was far more impressive than your opponent. vote: rock |
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