The Parables Of Man

Diablo · 12-17-2017, 04:48 PM

I can see some people who will nitpick over the way some multies line up, but the mid section of this bounces along nicely as it says read from a flow standpoint. I enjoyed the universe section into Adam/Atoms and Eve and whatnot (mainly because I've covered something not all too dissimilar previously). I enjoyed the callbacks or carry over rhymes used as internals at certain points too, not sure there's an actual term for that stuff, but you know what I mean. The section to do with weed and Obama was kind of lost on me too in truth, maybe it's an American thing cause I saw my European thug Objective didn't get that either so I'll look past that. This is one of the better efforts I've read by you.

Keep that pen moving!

12-17-2017, 04:48 PM	#7
Diablo Badgerdick Join Date: Jul 2015 Location: Showdown City Posts: 2,634 Battle Record: 11-2 Champed - Art of Writing League Rep Power: 22685552	I can see some people who will nitpick over the way some multies line up, but the mid section of this bounces along nicely as it says read from a flow standpoint. I enjoyed the universe section into Adam/Atoms and Eve and whatnot (mainly because I've covered something not all too dissimilar previously). I enjoyed the callbacks or carry over rhymes used as internals at certain points too, not sure there's an actual term for that stuff, but you know what I mean. The section to do with weed and Obama was kind of lost on me too in truth, maybe it's an American thing cause I saw my European thug Objective didn't get that either so I'll look past that. This is one of the better efforts I've read by you. Keep that pen moving!