Thrilla

UnbornBuddha · 07-17-2016, 12:35 AM

You started very climatically out the gate, full swing (no pun intended). The title of the piece had already conjured to me your aim. As one comes to expect with a Certain piece it is very meticulously crafted. You began detailing his athletic prowess and then going to allegorically using his boxing, the punching and the striking, as the pivot toward his life at large. He was a very prolific figure in the fight against human and racial oppression. That said I found some of the latter part of the piece kind of minuscule in terms of meat.
I also didn't understand the pagan part, but perhaps that is my own fault.
Stylistically I didn't like the repetitive sold part, ironically it felt a bit too oversold. I like the ending it meshed with the beginning.
The rhythm never faltered, albeit it felt more along the lines of a poetic work. The format just seems off-kiltered to be considered hip hop still, but that's just my opinion.

Thanks for the read.

07-17-2016, 12:35 AM	#13
UnbornBuddha Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2014 Posts: 1,008 Battle Record: 23-10 Champed - Art of Writing League - AOWL Season 5 Rep Power: 23856379	You started very climatically out the gate, full swing (no pun intended). The title of the piece had already conjured to me your aim. As one comes to expect with a Certain piece it is very meticulously crafted. You began detailing his athletic prowess and then going to allegorically using his boxing, the punching and the striking, as the pivot toward his life at large. He was a very prolific figure in the fight against human and racial oppression. That said I found some of the latter part of the piece kind of minuscule in terms of meat. I also didn't understand the pagan part, but perhaps that is my own fault. Stylistically I didn't like the repetitive sold part, ironically it felt a bit too oversold. I like the ending it meshed with the beginning. The rhythm never faltered, albeit it felt more along the lines of a poetic work. The format just seems off-kiltered to be considered hip hop still, but that's just my opinion. Thanks for the read.