Week 1: Ullr vs. Timeless- ULLR WINS 8-0

UnbornBuddha · 07-22-2015, 12:28 AM

Conceptually I liked timeless more. And I tend to like that structural basis Timeless used more because it seems more natural and easier on the eyes. Reading is supposed to be relaxing after all, engaging but relaxing. However, it as others have pointed out. Timeless piece felt off-kilter due to its brevity, which isn't always an indication of perfunctory work. But, this time around the piece felt fragmentary, delivering only a taste of water while thirst was still present in the reader for more.

Ullr's piece was mechanically sound, but there was something about it that I found unappealing. It felt a bit dry to me, reason being, is because I felt like it lacked any climax and or action. Now, I understand this to be more like an ode, but nevertheless it still felt somewhat stilted. Also, all the limited verses I've read from you before, I notice that your scheming and cadence is different than what I'm accustomed. It exposes me to a different rhythm, which I appreciate greatly. but sometimes this rhythm does feel a bit too slow in delivering the outcome of your intended meaning. Nevertheless, I still felt yours unraveled more, presenting us with a conclusive idea that you carried out until the very end.

Vote: ULLR

07-22-2015, 12:28 AM	#10
UnbornBuddha Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2014 Posts: 1,008 Battle Record: 23-10 Champed - Art of Writing League - AOWL Season 5 Rep Power: 23856379	Conceptually I liked timeless more. And I tend to like that structural basis Timeless used more because it seems more natural and easier on the eyes. Reading is supposed to be relaxing after all, engaging but relaxing. However, it as others have pointed out. Timeless piece felt off-kilter due to its brevity, which isn't always an indication of perfunctory work. But, this time around the piece felt fragmentary, delivering only a taste of water while thirst was still present in the reader for more. Ullr's piece was mechanically sound, but there was something about it that I found unappealing. It felt a bit dry to me, reason being, is because I felt like it lacked any climax and or action. Now, I understand this to be more like an ode, but nevertheless it still felt somewhat stilted. Also, all the limited verses I've read from you before, I notice that your scheming and cadence is different than what I'm accustomed. It exposes me to a different rhythm, which I appreciate greatly. but sometimes this rhythm does feel a bit too slow in delivering the outcome of your intended meaning. Nevertheless, I still felt yours unraveled more, presenting us with a conclusive idea that you carried out until the very end. Vote: ULLR Last edited by UnbornBuddha; 07-22-2015 at 01:36 AM.