episode I

[Zen]

Sometimes I feel I got no voice.
I'm voiceless...
Screaming. Stop. It's pointless.
I don't care anymore.
I'm lost in void,
a guest that you ought to avoid.
I'm stressed.
In need of a fuckin' rest.
In need of a dream to believe in, I guess.
I had no father.
It was just me in the trench.
No Hero. No God.
No reason to live.
A bleedin' broken heart
in need of a stitch.

Shit...

Niece is up and screaming,
"Put on Lilo & Stitch!!"
She looks up at me,
"Come on, meathead.
I need to see it again."
Treat her like my own,
and unplug the tv.
She busts out laughing.
"You poop-butt, he-he."

lol

Spend allota time alone,
but l like it that way.
Go from zen, violent to stoned all night today.
Fist clinched with Pringles chips and a pipe to smoke.
Grinnin' big with each little hit;
dyin' from coughin'.
Sittin', seein' shit.
My minds exhausted.
How do I even exist?
Time is warpin'.

Fuck.

I'm tired. Day dreamin' again.
A caffeine addict.
I stay needin' a fix.
I grab a cigarette and breathe deep the mist
of tobacco leaf squeezed with a mint.

Ah...

Always ahead or behind.
I always seem to forget.
Walkin' the hallways
lookin' for any seat I can get.
"I been doing drugs all night!!",
I scream to the kids.
They all run and hide.
"Thank you, Jesus."
Amen.