Lost for answers, any REAL feedback?

Xnub · 08-05-2013, 07:08 AM

A couple weeks ago I made that thread talking about, 'Do all men cheat, or does it just show insecurity'...

Now, I'm not usually one to get my personal life all caught up in the interwebs, but since I'm semi-anonymous, and am sincerely lost for answers... I figured why not share my problem w/ NC's ... and see what advice I might get.

Here's the backstory needed.....

I love my girlfriend.

Meaning, I want her to have my children. I want to grow old with this person. I want to be buried next to her. She's what I'd call my soul mate. I'd do ANYTHING for this girl.

I cheated on her, 6 months into our new 'relationship'..... She found out recently... After about a year and a half has gone by...

Ok, now here's where shit get's hairy...

Once she found out, I put myself in her shoes... Or tried to at least... and found myself asking, "How could I forgive myself if I were her, could I?" and this has plagued me ever since. I think that the role male and females play in a relationship are different of course... but if I were her, would I be able to forgive me, truly?

Long story short, I fucked her over again..... Left w/ her at my house sleeping, while I was drunk.... To meet up w/ an ex.... only to wind up getting in trouble, not getting any pussy, and feeling like I totally just signed the death warrant on something that was already hanging on by a thread.

Where was I left? Still in love, still just wanting her, wondering why I chose to do the things I did... Wishing I hadn't done them at all... Wondering where my head could have been... Wondering where her head must be...

The days went by, and she became distant. Eventually, she ended up fucking someone else. After she did this, she came and fucked me the next day, got caught up in a lie... and now I found myself on the other end of the stick. I felt betrayed and hurt... I wanted nothing more than to just call her a slut to her face and be done w/ it.... but was constantly faced w/ the dilemma that I caused ALL OF THIS. If it wasn't for my mistakes, none of this would of happened, right?

Ok, tl;dr.... whatever, venting. suck my dick.....

The question I pose to NC's is this.

Am I taking this all too seriously? I mean I know I'm only 24, but shit.... who's to say she's not the one for me? Who's to say anyone else would be better? Is it possible that we can still have a healthy and fulfilling relationship together even though so many things have happened between us? How do I move past her PURPOSELY going to fuck someone else, just to hurt me... and then saying she's always loved me and just wants to be w/ me. I know where my intentions were when I did what I did, and I can honestly say they were not to hurt her..... I unno, this post has turned into an emo-esk rant... AND I DO NOT LIKE IT. FUCK YA'll, I Get more pussy than this whole site combined, get at me.... GAy ass niggas.

Peace.

08-05-2013, 07:08 AM	#1
Xnub SZNUBBED Join Date: Apr 2013 Location: California Posts: 286 Battle Record: 5-13 Rep Power: 37	Lost for answers, any REAL feedback? A couple weeks ago I made that thread talking about, 'Do all men cheat, or does it just show insecurity'... Now, I'm not usually one to get my personal life all caught up in the interwebs, but since I'm semi-anonymous, and am sincerely lost for answers... I figured why not share my problem w/ NC's ... and see what advice I might get. Here's the backstory needed..... I love my girlfriend. Meaning, I want her to have my children. I want to grow old with this person. I want to be buried next to her. She's what I'd call my soul mate. I'd do ANYTHING for this girl. I cheated on her, 6 months into our new 'relationship'..... She found out recently... After about a year and a half has gone by... Ok, now here's where shit get's hairy... Once she found out, I put myself in her shoes... Or tried to at least... and found myself asking, "How could I forgive myself if I were her, could I?" and this has plagued me ever since. I think that the role male and females play in a relationship are different of course... but if I were her, would I be able to forgive me, truly? Long story short, I fucked her over again..... Left w/ her at my house sleeping, while I was drunk.... To meet up w/ an ex.... only to wind up getting in trouble, not getting any pussy, and feeling like I totally just signed the death warrant on something that was already hanging on by a thread. Where was I left? Still in love, still just wanting her, wondering why I chose to do the things I did... Wishing I hadn't done them at all... Wondering where my head could have been... Wondering where her head must be... The days went by, and she became distant. Eventually, she ended up fucking someone else. After she did this, she came and fucked me the next day, got caught up in a lie... and now I found myself on the other end of the stick. I felt betrayed and hurt... I wanted nothing more than to just call her a slut to her face and be done w/ it.... but was constantly faced w/ the dilemma that I caused ALL OF THIS. If it wasn't for my mistakes, none of this would of happened, right? Ok, tl;dr.... whatever, venting. suck my dick..... The question I pose to NC's is this. Am I taking this all too seriously? I mean I know I'm only 24, but shit.... who's to say she's not the one for me? Who's to say anyone else would be better? Is it possible that we can still have a healthy and fulfilling relationship together even though so many things have happened between us? How do I move past her PURPOSELY going to fuck someone else, just to hurt me... and then saying she's always loved me and just wants to be w/ me. I know where my intentions were when I did what I did, and I can honestly say they were not to hurt her..... I unno, this post has turned into an emo-esk rant... AND I DO NOT LIKE IT. FUCK YA'll, I Get more pussy than this whole site combined, get at me.... GAy ass niggas. Peace.