"entertainment rhyme notes" from the last week or 2

Pharaohs Army · 10-05-2014, 12:34 AM

,

UnbornBuddha · 10-05-2014, 02:21 AM

Some comical notations indeed. It would be nice to see a piece instead of jottings. Nevertheless, I giggled and experienced lapses of satisfaction upon reading this. Although, there was a longing for a more constructive consolidation, in which you embark us on a literary journey that both lightens the mood, and produces profound insight to the state of mind you are in when you are pouring those words from your brain, and giving these shapeless ideas form. A creative form at that. Take the reader into the trance state. Almost like the shaman who beats his drum, or sings his song and soon enough his instrument becomes a passage for the listener/ reader to experience a side of life they have not yet gotten involved with.
Show the reader their destiny, twist their mind, puzzle them, show them the folly of their thinking as well as your own. Merge with their hearts, and on the same token of dichotomous similarity challenge them.
Give us a stimulus of brilliant light so that the apertures which have become habituated to the same light, and wavelength/ sound are opened to new possibilities. Alter our consciousness by taking hold of our being, and transporting us to sensory dimensional warps so we can become aware of the subtle biological change happening in us and all around us.

Rattle the reader's core with a stroke of genius that inspires them to examine themselves, and the contents of their life, and belief systems. Resonate with their spirit, and breakdown their desires. Show them the dark, and good (yin/ and yang). Take them to heaven and hell, and through the emotional joy ride accompanied by fright and shock console them by showing them that even through such ravages everything is okay.
This are not demands, more like illusory transitory ramblings as the night approaches its end. Good to see you writing.

Pharaohs Army · 10-05-2014, 03:17 AM

wow. well said. i knowww
and i know this; i know.
i just love putting the bits together and practicing and "bending".

but ask and ye shall receive.
next weekend or the 1 after.

insight to the state of mind you are in...
which means "one sitting", like the old days.
or, somehow "channel" that state each time i jot a note piecemeal..
hmm..
i will deliver though.
Thanks for reading guild

10-05-2014, 12:34 AM	#1
Pharaohs Army Banned Join Date: Aug 2014 Posts: 2,956 Battle Record: 6 - 14 Rep Power: 0	"entertainment rhyme notes" from the last week or 2 , Last edited by Pharaohs Army; 07-13-2016 at 08:25 PM.

10-05-2014, 02:21 AM	#2
UnbornBuddha Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2014 Posts: 1,008 Battle Record: 23-10 Champed - Art of Writing League - AOWL Season 5 Rep Power: 23856379	Some comical notations indeed. It would be nice to see a piece instead of jottings. Nevertheless, I giggled and experienced lapses of satisfaction upon reading this. Although, there was a longing for a more constructive consolidation, in which you embark us on a literary journey that both lightens the mood, and produces profound insight to the state of mind you are in when you are pouring those words from your brain, and giving these shapeless ideas form. A creative form at that. Take the reader into the trance state. Almost like the shaman who beats his drum, or sings his song and soon enough his instrument becomes a passage for the listener/ reader to experience a side of life they have not yet gotten involved with. Show the reader their destiny, twist their mind, puzzle them, show them the folly of their thinking as well as your own. Merge with their hearts, and on the same token of dichotomous similarity challenge them. Give us a stimulus of brilliant light so that the apertures which have become habituated to the same light, and wavelength/ sound are opened to new possibilities. Alter our consciousness by taking hold of our being, and transporting us to sensory dimensional warps so we can become aware of the subtle biological change happening in us and all around us. Rattle the reader's core with a stroke of genius that inspires them to examine themselves, and the contents of their life, and belief systems. Resonate with their spirit, and breakdown their desires. Show them the dark, and good (yin/ and yang). Take them to heaven and hell, and through the emotional joy ride accompanied by fright and shock console them by showing them that even through such ravages everything is okay. This are not demands, more like illusory transitory ramblings as the night approaches its end. Good to see you writing. Last edited by UnbornBuddha; 10-05-2014 at 02:37 AM.

10-05-2014, 03:17 AM	#3
Pharaohs Army Banned Join Date: Aug 2014 Posts: 2,956 Battle Record: 6 - 14 Rep Power: 0	wow. well said. i knowww and i know this; i know. i just love putting the bits together and practicing and "bending". but ask and ye shall receive. next weekend or the 1 after. insight to the state of mind you are in... which means "one sitting", like the old days. or, somehow "channel" that state each time i jot a note piecemeal.. hmm.. i will deliver though. Thanks for reading guild