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#1 |
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
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Last edited by Bodey; 08-16-2014 at 03:16 PM. |
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#2 |
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Join Date: Aug 2013
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Don't click it's a virus
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#3 |
obsessed
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: fucka idiyote
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yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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#4 |
βгοкε ㄴεςηαг
Join Date: Jun 2013
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#5 |
Bags will be avenged
Join Date: Jan 2013
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man, I started listening to this
I dunno maybe try writing first? |
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#6 |
Senior Member
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I feel like my flow is better when I freestyle but then it doesn't have enough substance. When I write, I think too much and get too technical w my shit and then it doesn't rap so smoothly. It pisses me off cuz it used to come easy
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#7 |
βгοкε ㄴεςηαг
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So I just listened and figured I'd give some constructive criticism. You have a style very reminiscent to Slug's, so as you space out ur freestyles, there's a few things you can do to make the lines more effective. Cut back on the profanity. It just comes across as filler, and even though it helps to provide that pause so you can think of the next thing to say, it ultimately takes up valuable space that you could be using to better emphasize your point. I would challenge yourself. You obviously knew what the concept was going to be, so find q better way of illustrating it. That part where you were saying thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen and going through your age, that was just time consuming. You need to think of better ways to cut the filler out and replace it with something more concise. Not too bad.
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#8 |
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a lot better than the last one i listened to
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#9 |
Bags will be avenged
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yeah, and don't just be like, 'I put drugs in my body'
be like 'mistaking carpet fuzz for powder.' show me what you're talking about don't just tell me |
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#10 |
βгοкε ㄴεςηαг
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This, too. If you're going to tell us a personal detail, don't generalize it. Expound on it. What drugs did you put into your body? Why? What else have you been putting into your body? Who? Where did that experience leave you and when do you expect to get over it? This alone could have eliminated alot of the filler.
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#11 | |
kickthekan
Join Date: May 2014
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I must rap my shit a dozen times over while i write it specifically to make sure the flow and breath control are on point.
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lnk.bio/kickthekan FIRSTCLASS
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#12 |
Senior Member
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Wow thanks guys. Ima sit down tonight and write
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#13 |
βгοкε ㄴεςηαг
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Lol. If ur practicing freestyling the only thing u should be writing down, if anything, is content that u would like to cover in the freestyle. If u want to challenge urself, I mean really challenge urself, u should start doing word association with a dictionary and thesaurus. One word at a time. And make a concept out of that word. Keep it going for as long as u can. Do not change ur concept. After you're confident enough, then u take the word association from the books and apply them to ur surroundings. Pick a word, look around, and tie it in. Repeat.
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#14 |
DOHpe since 02'
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cock
I spy a rock(outside my windoe) hello kitty socks crotch 2 grams of shitty pot hansons "mmm bop" (single) like this broke? im on my way thx
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Bitch I floss . I Got the chain out to see like Constantinople |
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#15 |
βгοкε ㄴεςηαг
Join Date: Jun 2013
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