Week 1 Magazine

[Sn00p]

AOBL
Week 1 Magazine
by Sn00p



Intro
What's up, y'all. This is Sn00p typing up your
first ever AOBL Magazine...for the 2nd time.
I accidentally deleted most of what I had, so
I'm really unmotivated now. Well, it was my
own fault, so I'm not gonna let it out on you.
Let me introduce myself: I'm your mod this
season. I've been modding things for some
years now and I've run some seasons of the
NBL as some of y'all might remember. But
there are some differences now. First off, I
will run this league without co-mods. Still,
I might need help with magazines at times,
but mostly, I will write them on my own to
make sure they're always on time. If you
are willing to help, though, just let me know
in this thread or in the Chat thread or via
PM. For all those who've already agreed to
help: I haven't forgotten about y'all and I
will get back to you when I actually need
help. Thanks in advance though. Next up,
I'm going to tell you something about how
I will run this league. I will enforce the
rules strictly. This doesn't mean that you
should be afraid, however, because all the
rules are posted in every battle thread. And
they aren't hard to follow at all. So as long
as you show up within a reasonable time
frame and vote, you should be good. Unless
you do something extremely stupid. But I
trust all of you to not do that. If you're not
sure about the rules (or anything else con-
cerning the league), feel free to ask me. I
am always here to help you, so don't be
afraid to hit me up with whatever. Well, I
think that's all for now. I just want to tell
you to have fun. All the modding I do is
ultimately done to make this league a fun
and smooth experience for you. So don't
forget that. But enough of this talk now.



Let's meet our Contestants
bleak — An up and coming txtcee. He has
been elevating for some time, but still looks
for that one big win to bring him to the next
level. If he keeps at it, this season he will
make his break through. Just stay trying.
Meth — Even though he is known more as
a mod than as a battler, Meth has some
funny punchlines. If he can fix up his wor-
ding, he'll be one to watch out for here.
Malachi — Prophet has been doing text
for some time and he's getting better too.
He hasn't made it to that next step yet,
but I'm sure that he'll catch some people
sleeping this season and get some upsets.
Allen Knight — There's a reason why he
has won everything there was to win on
AOB so far. He is a very consistent batt-
ler and comes with a lot of very decent
punchlines against any given opponent.
SiK — One of the better newer guys. He
was in a battle league champ match on
NC already, and I can see him doing the
same thing here. Definitely a battler to
watch. If he keeps elevating like he's been
doing, he will make a splash this season.
Boredom — Alphabet has been around for
some time, but never got that one big
win that put him on people's radar. This
should change this season if he stays in.
I can picture him in a champ match to-
wards the end of this season for sure.
Immaculate — A femcee on the come up.
She might very well be her own biggest
enemy, because she'd be a lot better if
she stopped slacking and keying verses.
Sharp Nine — Known to drop some funny
lines in roasts, Sharp should be good if
he can manage to transfer that style to
his battle verses. If he keeps elevating,
I can definitely see him in the play offs.
mdesanto — I think I remember him from
NC, but I'm not entirely sure. That's why
I can't really say too much here, but I'll
be able to next week after he's battled.
Inertia — The same is true for this dude.
He could be an alias, though, because I
don't recognize this name. So watch out
for him. Maybe he's much better than you
think and catches you off-guard here.
Dystopian — Dystopian could be an alias
too. We will be able to tell after week 1.
Hollywood — One of the top contenders.
He has a very developed style that works
well with the voters. Expect to see him in
some championship matches this season.
Rayge — Another newer guy that could
make his break through this season. He's
been elevating quickly, and if he keeps at
it, I can see him in a champ match to-
wards the end of the season like Boredom.
tyler — Tyler Durden is an on and off
battler that just never got the shine he
deserve because he always randomly
disappeared for some time. If he stays
signed in, though, expect him to make a
name for himself quickly in the league.
Joe Boston — He can definitely come
with some cool lines, but he hasn't got
the consistency it takes to champ this
league...yet. If he elevates some more,
he will make a splash this season or next.
God Of War — The only thing that can
prevent him from champing this league
is probably his kid keeping him from ty-
ping up his verses. But then again, he
mostly keys them anyways, so expect
to see God champing sooner or later.
Dr. Benzo — Probably an alias. Might
be a beginner, though. Time will tell.
Hush — If he's motivated to say in for
long enough, he's one of the guys that
are bound to champ this league. But
he can be really lazy at times. That is
the only way he won't champ, however.
Probably the Number One Contender.
Genocide — He knows how to hold his
own in topicals, but isn't quite as con-
sistent in battles. But with namix tutoring
him and him being a good writer over-
all, I can see him rise in the ranks fast.
Muff — Even though his lines have got-
ten really long, Muff still has more than
decent punchlines. If he gets back to
his old wording, he'll make a splash.
Jay — A newer guy, I think. But he
seems to be the kinda person that can
elevate fast. Or maybe he is an alias.
Strikta — This dude has some of the
best generic concepts I've seen in some
time. His wording is quite good too. He
is generally perceived as an underdog,
but not rightfully so. He'll win a lot.

[Sn00p]

Throwback Battle
John Hensley vs. Oneduh

Oneduh:
Like it wasn't enough that you bit his line & style.. the craziest shit
.. Is you using the shit in his custom text to make our alias with
If you don't pull bitch moves like last week, you KNOW you're in trouble
So go ahead, agree on a line limit......... then post more than double
Dude can't even afford to eat, will this help? nope, sadly
Hen WILL be layin an egg.. but it'll be in the vote tallies
Since you're Hen.. Rooster would be the right name for your slut
.. Plus every morning her screams wake my entire neighborhood up
I'll be remembered for settin records.. before you hate me, chill son
I'm sure you'll be remembered too,
.. as the guy I got my 3rd AND 18th win from
Don't act like you forgot.. that shit is fraudulent, pal
I got the W before, HEN.. & you know exactly WHEN I'm talkin about
You fallin off.. it was said best in Chingy's new track
Cuz everytime you try to leave.. I gotta question bringin you back
I'll get verse of the week, top power rank, & top punches?.. it's not a problem
The only place you WON'T be seeing One.. is in my loss column
Last week, you got all that^.. I was hypin him up
But thanks to you biting.. this'll STILL be onesided as fuck
When the votes come in.. you'll see everyone say my name
Champ'll get so many picks.. it'll look like the Monday night game
They say Hens' concepts are fresh.. sumin is funny here tho
He's like Janet Jackson.. his newest shit is 20 Years Old


John Hensley:
Claim to be original...

^^Never pay attention whenever this cat speaks.
Man, dudes called my line played last YEAR...
... so sure enough.. Oneduh goes and drops the shit last WEEK.
Wack geek. quit braggin, kids know this head's rhymes are wack.
Don't thank ya skills for beatin me last time..
... you can thank the votin' deadline for that.
You gave me top verse, top punch, after that how can you fuck with this.
When YOU were responsible for an entire mag that basically sucked my dick.
Now u and women? i might be the meanest, n' ya likely to see this.
Cuz a bitch would NEVER touch One.. unless they mention the size of his penis.
Janet? haha, it's halftime. i don't care if kids might see this.
But i'll play Timberlake..
.. cuz when it comes to ya title.. you're gettin stripped like she did.
Don't think he prewrote, shit, i'll let HIM tell ya his threads rehearsed.
Anthraxspits: '' put it this way.. i started writing for you when i read your verse ''
Kid broke Cale's record, so ya think ya equal and ur lovin it dog.
Except he did it against Tang, Namix, Corey, Scientz.. and oh yea, he WASN'T the mod..
Last month was the 9/11 anny, showcasing it's power.
And ironically...
.. bar graphin' ur success is just like a before n' after pic of the twin towers.
My fists cause broken necks, so stop writin' words before ya think.
^Like drivin without turn signals.. they'll make ya fuckin head turn before ya blink.
And speakin of it now, fuck an alias, best believe he's goin down.
True, we BOTH used to be King... but I'M the only one that's leavin' with the crown.
Haha, ya gettin' shut out this time, mainly due to you droppin' gay.
But u'll still be undefeated.. if u win word of the week.. n' decide to take this loss away.



Predictions
Strikta vs. Hollywood: This should be
the battle of the week. Both are known
to come with it. And they're on a very
similar level, so this is hard to call. But I
think I've got to give it to Strikta here,
simply because Holly hasn't battled since
NC shut down, so he could be a bit rusty.
SiK vs. Allen Knight: Another really good
battle. Note that all battles were random-
ly generated. But I have to say that I like
this matchup. Allen Knight is the very safe
pick here, but I have a feeling that SiK'll
be really motivated and could catch Allen
sleeping. On the other hand, Allen is a
very consistent battler that never really
slacks. So I guess he has to be the pick.
Muff vs. Rayge: Similarly to the SiK vs.
Allen Knight battle, this could end up as
an upset, because Rayge has been ele-
vating fast and Muff might underestimate
him. But Muff always brings one or two
really hard-hitting lines in a battle, and I
think he'll be able to win because of that.
tyler vs. Meth: Another nice battle that
isn't too obvious. But tyler has been do-
ing text longer than Meth and seems to
be a more well-rounded txtcee overall. So
I think that he has to be the pick here,
even though he has a lot of personals
against him that could really help Meth
clown him. Still, I got Tyler Durden here.
Hush vs. bleak: They have had picture
battles against each other in the past,
which Hush all won. Even though Hush
is probably even deadlier at picture batt-
les than he is at regular ones, I still have
him as the clear winner here. He is one
of the NC Hall of Famers and bleak is
still looking for a come-up. No Thrift Shop.
Genocide vs. Sharp Nine: This is not a
bad battle by any means. Both are still
learning how to polish their text verses,
but both already have a quite good un-
derstanding of the fundamentals. It's
probably just a matter of who's been
elevating faster recently. Still, I gotta
give this to Genocide, simply because
he's been doing text longer and has the
experience on his side. Kinda close, tho.
God Of War vs. Inertia: Unless Inertia is
an alias (which I don't think), God of
War should take this for sure. Everyone
knows what he's capable of, & it should
be enough to defeat someone new here.
Joe Boston vs. Malachi: This is a very
even battle. Both are relatively new to
txt but not bad by any means. I think
that Joe has been doing it a bit longer,
but not by much, so I give the slight
edge to him, even though this is close.
Dr. Benzo vs. Boredom: Unless Dr. Benzo
is an alias, Boredom should get this. Due
to the possibility, he shouldn't slack tho,
because he might get caught otherwise.
Jay vs. Immaculate: Both seem to be new.
And I think that both still have some ele-
vating to do. It probably comes down to
who tries more. And that's why I gotta
give it to Jay. I just hope that Immaculate
takes this as motivation and drops really
dope just to prove me wrong here. Do it!
mdesanto vs. Dystopian: A decent battle.
Unless Dys is an alias, this should be even.
I can't really predict the winner here, since
I've never seen Dys battle, but if both try
here, it should be a cool little read for us.



Time for Odds
Who will champ the league first?
bleak: 8-1
Meth: 6-1
Malachi: 10-1
Allen Knight: 3-1
SiK: 5-1
Boredom: 6-1
Immaculate: 10-1
Sharp Nine: 8-1
mdesanto: 10-1
Inertia: 11-1
Dystopian: 11-1
Hollywood: 3-1
Rayge: 6-1
tyler: 4-1
Joe Boston: 7-1
God Of War: 2-1
Dr. Benzo: 11-1
Hush: 2-1
Genocide: 6-1
Muff: 4-1
Jay: 11-1
Strikta: 3-1



Outro
That's it from me. Now it's on you to put
in some work and prove to everyone you
do deserve the props you were given in
advance. All there's left to say is: Enjoy!


[video]http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/e/16711680/wshh54N8u84G862H47JZ[/video]

[Dominate]

@Sn00p everytime I read your mags it's soooooo obvious that you're German hahahahaha

[Boredom]

Good look on the mag snoopaloopdoop

[Joe Boston]

Nice mag @Snoop

[Ghost1]

Joe bostons a faggit @Sn00p

[Strikta]

Very nice bro.

[Allen Knight]

dope mag

Sweet

[Sn00p]

Originally Posted by Dominate

@Sn00p everytime I read your mags it's soooooo obvious that you're German hahahahaha

how so? lol

[Maximus]

Good read man, thanks for taking ur time out to do this

[Dominate]

@Sn00p,

0 spelling or grammar errors
absurdly consistent formatting
a spiel about the rules and how they will be enforced


lol. I mean it as a compliment tho. It's shit like this that makes you guys so good at mathematics. I would be right at home in Germany if I spoke the language I think

[Jay]

i can dig it.... good content

[namix]

Originally Posted by Dominate

@Sn00p everytime I read your mags it's soooooo obvious that you're German hahahahaha

haha, I thought for sure you were coming @ Sn00p when I read this --- like he doesn't know the english language or something. was thinkin like, damn how's someone already attackin a mag, especially a well-done one at that lol

but totally see what your'e saying now - you're very meticulous with your mags, sn00p, good shit man!

[Dominate]

@namix lol ironically one of the things that make it obvious that he's German is the fact that his English is perfect - better than most native speakers... hahahaha

[Sn00p]

Originally Posted by Dominate

@namix lol ironically one of the things that make it obvious that he's German is the fact that his English is perfect - better than most native speakers... hahahaha

lmao thanks. It's understandable though. I actually had to learn all these things, so I apply them with more thought, I guess.

And thanks to everyone for the compliments. It's those little posts that keep you writing mags haha

[namix]

Originally Posted by Dominate

@namix lol ironically one of the things that make it obvious that he's German is the fact that his English is perfect - better than most native speakers... hahahaha

for sure man - i see it now.

even how he just used commas in the above post "I actually had to learn all these things, so I apply them with more thought, I guess."

Impressive Sn00p.


Correction:
Very impressive, Sn00p!

[Tridium]

decent mag

[Hush]

Dope job looking forward to next weeks issue.

[Arch.]

what's good Fruitcakes?